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When you truly love someone, you would go through anything to prove your commitment to them. If your boyfriend doesn't want to marry you, it's because he doesn't value you enough to make that kind of commitment. Or at least, he values the freedom of keeping one foot out the door way more.
And if you listen to his excuses as to why he thinks marriage is stupid, you'll quickly determine that it's not the ceremony in and of itself he takes issue with, it's the fact that he doesn't think you're worth it.
Regardless of how dumb he thinks the ceremony is, whatever issue he has with the whole affair would be swallowed if he thought you were worth the investment.
My ex wanted to marry me and made it very clear. Asked my parents and my two married older siblings if he can take my hand, his mom knew that he was searching for rings, he would talk about marriage with me to his mom and I was in same room so I know this is for fact,
and we talked about it many times even venue ideas, and he was very “about it” like I wouldn’t have expected what he told me several months later….
One day he told me he thinks marriage is slavery, just a title, just for taxes, and only a legal piece of paper.
I think of marriage as more sacred than all his words. He told me in a grocery store.
He would have still married me, but after he told me that, I didn’t want to marry him anymore.
"Or at least, he values the freedom of keeping one foot out the door way more."
Yeah, definitely. He knows for sure she's not the one he wants. He dates her to mine all her resources, labor and affection while he attempts to waste as much time as possible jUsT iN CAsE the woman of his dreams appears. Sometimes he marries her, but because he doesn't see any better option, not because he loves her.
Now I'm reminded of those wedding videos where the men humiliates their bride. Fuckers hate the women they marry.
I think that most men know full well that marriage is more than just a "piece of paper". LVM pretend to believe this because they want the benefits of marriage i.e. co-habitation, split bills and children, without the legal committment. They know that not being married makes it much easier to walk out on the mother of their child whenever they feel like it. Also if a man genuinely believed that marriage was just "a piece of paper", why not just go ahead and do it to make his girlfriend happy?!
Absolutely! I agree ! The best thing to do is not to waste our time debating then why it’s important for us women but to get the fuck out of the situation and block and delete his ass . That’s a big red flag in itself I think it’s a siren and he already showed us what he thinks of us that we are not worth committing to legally under the disguise of “ but but marriage is just a piece of paper I hate the ceremony yada yada ” that’s all we need to know .
My ex told me he would NEVER marry because I'm going to want him for his money. All I wanted was to be with him. Money was never even in the picture. We were together for 8 years....& mind you, at the time he said this I was working while he was just an intern without getting paid. I ended up being behind in school because I dedicated MY time mainly to him. I'm the reason why he's successful now. But little does he know, I'm now finishing my masters and will be applying to dental school very soon.
I no longer want to get married nor have kids. But whoever comes along in my life and wants to end up marrying me? They're going to have to go to the damn moon in order to change my mind.
I'm torn on this one.
Men should be leaping and begging for marriage, because it benefits THEM.
I know it's not pure FDS, but I'm much more skeptical of the benefits of marriage for women. Too often - even with the best of intentions, a great career and a strong resolve - women get sucked in, hosed down and ruined by marriage and child bearing. Even a HVM can turn like sour milk.
So if he's not jumping for joy at the prospect, run. And protect yourselves ladies. Having children with your own eggs and a sperm bank is safer than with a man, imo. Maybe date, don't buy?