“You would be so great for him!”

Just a short comment because there have been so many posts about getting set up by people recently.

Remember: Most people who try to set you up with a man they know primarily have HIS interests and benefit in mind, not yours. The single cousin, brother, friend of a friend, neighbor, colleague, guy from their hobby group who is sooo lonely and tired of being single that they are taking pity on him? That’s whose interests they are serving. They know you are great, don’t get me wrong. That’s the whole point. It’s what makes you the perfect match in their mind.

They are looking at you – an accomplished, amazing woman – and their first thought is “Hey, she could really improve the life of that random, loser male I know. Let’s manipulate and guilt her into giving him a chance.”.

They know you are completely out of that man’s league and that he has absolutely nothing to offer you. But the point of setting you up is not to make YOU happy or YOUR life better. It’s to make you invest your energy and time into building, babysitting and serving a man they know because he obviously deserves that for having a penis.

Any friend, family member or acquaintance who is trying to set you up with a male who is not in your league and anyone didn’t make YOUR benefit the only deciding factor in choosing a man to set you up with is not your ally. They are actively choosing a man’s interests over yours and trying to sell you to him as a bangmaid. No person who truly loves you would do that.