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In light of all the recent posts about vetting women as well for friendship, what are some green flags for HVW? What worked for you? How do you vet them, and where have you found success?
I'm frustrated and alarmed but I'm not surprised based on the industry I'm working (male dominated). One of the only two people I can almost consider high value has made questionable choices as of late, and the other is a man, and I think he has high value traits, but I dont trust men much.
I'm considering switching careers.
I can’t tell you where to find HVW but I can tell you where you are highly UNLIKELY to find them. - in the bars/clubs. They are there to get men. - online. On the whole, when I tried bumble BFF and the like, the women either didn’t message much, or make excuses not to meet. It was like typical OLD! You stand a better chance of finding HVW if they do non-alcohol induced activities. If they already have a bf/partner and don’t seem desperate for male attention outside of his, that’s a great sign.
Taking it slowly, not trauma-dumping, asking you questions but not too intrusive. Respecting your boundaries, showing up on time, reciprocation in effort+availability. Your conversations pass the Bechdel Test i.e. you can talk about things other than men.
Good luck! There are many awesome women out there!
i found a HVF via work so yes, if you can't find friends within your workplace, do consider switching because you will eventually drown in the negative environment.
anyway, this younger woman and i bonded over our similar views on relationships. she is considerably younger than me so i do excuse some of her more trivial ways of thinking. however, we align on pretty much everything else so talking to her, even though we don't agree on everything under the sun, doesn't feel like i'm pulling teeth. now the reason why i considered the relationship thing a green flag is because the way someone views romantic relationships means they carry over similar opinions on any other relationship.