Using Women as Test Dummies: Misleading women as a team building exercise

Hi, Ladies!

This is a piggyback off another post I just replied to, discussing the male game of collecting women's numbers as a contest among scrotes. I shared about a (former) male friend who admitted to this because he was going along with the teachings of his Scrote Superiors, instructing him to do this--and monitoring him while he did it!--in order to "build confidence" with women, and practice approaching them. They had a specific number of girls' phone numbers he had to get to complete this mission (i.e. exercise of deception). He says he told the girl what was up, but I'm not sure he did that with all of them. What bullshit game playing! Misleading women for your ego boost, leaving her feeling rejected and wondering what happened.

I've also been told by guys I know (as well as warned about this by other men on dating podcasts) that they think it's fine to flirt with/hit on women, acting single (without actually saying they are--as if this makes them less dishonest), with no intention of actually following through. If it gets too far, or if the woman outright asks if they're single, then they fess up, but not otherwise.

They will even go so far as to make dates with a woman, meeting for coffee or drinks, etc., and if/when it finally comes out that they're married/taken, they'll play innocent and say, "Well, you never asked," or, "It's just coffee--as friends."

LOTS of guys do this, apparently, even one I would otherwise have considered an ally. He'd been with his girlfriend 8 years and wanted to see if he "still got it." I firmly told him it was cheating-adjacent and a shitty thing to do to the women he was using as test dummies. Another said, "Well, if it's not gonna go anywhere, what's the harm?" I told him that, besides dishonoring your wife/GF, you're misleading these women, making them think you're actually interested."

Now that I'm thinking about it, I recall it happening to me a couple of times...

There was a guy at a bar who invited me to sit with him, hung out with me an hour and a half, and invited me to go to another bar with him (I didn't go) before it finally came out that he had a live-in girlfriend! And, that was only because she called him right then and I asked about the caller. Then, he started pitching a threesome, saying his GF would be into it! (Who knows if that was, even, true, or if it was his highly misguided attempt at making himself look like less of a cheater, as if his GF had sent him on this mission in the first place, and his ensnaring me was a joint venture?)

Another man I met online (an expats forum for the country I was moving to), would stay up chatting with me until 3 in the morning (!), flirting hardcore, planning to meet in person when I arrived, and even inviting me to his private, indoor hot-tub!

Theeeeeennnn, since we all knew the same members of this online and IRL expats community, I found out that he had a serious girlfriend back home! Another expat woman said, "Oh, him--yeah, he's so handsome, but he has a girlfriend, and he talks about her a lot". Um, not to me, he doesn't! When I called him out, he "innocently" said, that, although it started out flirty between us, it was really just "more of platonic friendly thing". Then, when I told him off, he sarcastically said that I was at fault if I thought I actually knew anything about him when the only things he'd shared with me were what anyone could read on a basic application form or some other such banal document. Riiiight. Because he'd

invite the Customs Officer to his hot tub and talk about his little nephew with cancer while filling out visa forms. Sure, just giving basic info,like he would to anyone.... SIGH. (To be clear: I never met him in person. I met many others in the group, but he was very conveniently absent from those gatherings. Good.)