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Women are second-class citizens who have only reached economic financial independence (on a population mass scale) in the past 70 or so years. We have everything standing against us, every conceivable systemic obstacle from obstructions to bodily autonomy to sexist laws and policies. Many of us don't even have predecessors and are the first women in our families to achieve work on our own terms. We take care of ourselves and others, we create life (whether or not we give birth), we literally never stop doing productive and reproductive labor.
What are the men's excuses?
I'm anti-capitalist enough to know the system is conceptually and materially designed to beneifit the few, not the many. But patriarchy has placed men in positions of systemic dominance and given them every chance, head start, and cookie to accelerate in this system. Hell, THEY BUILT IT.
What does this mean for me? I am never again dating a man who isn't successful. "Success" is a term that must be defined contextually. For me, it's not only about dollars in the bank. (The head of a tobacco company may be wealthy but he's not "successful" in my eyes.) This isn't a post about that: I honestly don't care about men's pursuits. But I know that no man who isn't a profound success in my eyes gets a chance with me. He doesn't even get a slot on the roster.
It's a bare minimum.
Same here, if he's not successful I'm like "How many fuckin helping hands do you need?" Most of them are from middle class families too, they have no excuse.
Scrotes like to equate "women want successful men" with "women want men with tons of money", and they're not the same thing.
Financial stability is a bare minimum standard, and you can't really have success without that, but success is much more.
Success requires you to have decided your actual goals, both in material terms (a certain career, being a homeowner, etc) and as far as what type of person you want to be/your character.
Even if someone has trust fund money, if they're just aimlessly wandering about life, they can't be successful, because there's nothing they're trying to be successful at.
And then to be successful at whatever you choose, it requires discipline, drive, organization, responsibility, and many other attractive traits.
Depending on goals and career field a man might end up meeting different women's financial standards, but whether he meets a successful standard is still a different, second question. And whether whatever he is being successful at is something a specific woman thinks is representative of good values is a third question.
Yes Queen!!! Not to mention how jobs typically perceived as "female" pay lower despite being the backbone of society, certain high-paying fields still largely being boys clubs/dangerous predator groups, and women typically being more financially generous to family, friends, charity as well as having to pay more expenses than men do (prescriptions, period supplies, etc). If I sat here longer than 5 minutes I could come up with many, many more "excuses" for women and men simply have none.
I used to date men with little to no achievements and I have to save their face everytime I told people about them. That was humiliating. Now I don't want to do that anymore.
This. There are ZERO excuses when men have had every single advantage in life. And if they were born dumb (some are), then I don't want them anyway.
Work hard, invest, set goals, move forward. It's pretty simple.
If I could do it (a woman from a very poor upbringing, no network or help, now an MBA + business owner making mid 6-figures), they can too.
I am in my late 30s, and my HV dad raised me to avoid broke men. Don't disrespect them, don't build them, just avoid them.
Ever since I was in kindergarten, he has told me poor people are poor because they fucked up. An able-bodied adult (especially a man) in the U.S. really has no excuse to be poor.
It sounded harsh when I was younger, but over time, I've realized how right my dad has been, and I'm grateful he taught me early on to yeet men who have no money.
Mine is : Neat, he can't be gross, a slob, messy, anything that looks like a room of a man child.
Respect, When he acts out or allow disrespect because it's his best friends he can piss off.
Success, I'm not building a man ever, I've seen millionaires or financially comfortable at the age of 25 so I'm not tolerating him paying the light bill only while the perfume I bought for my self is more expensive than that.
He can be the leader in his own life, as soon as he starts b!tching about letting him lead I will lead him to the door and he can piss off.
Financially stable, kind, respectful, provider, emotionally mature, clean, family-oriented...thats all I can think of for now.