.png)
Yes, its on purpose. If your man just sits there and watches you struggle, when he is fully capable of relieving some of your burden, he hates you. Its an insidious hands-off form of abuse called a Sick System. No mental disorder justifies it.
https://www.issendai.com/psychology/sick-systems.html
My homegirls first husband had her in a Sick System and she doesn't know it.
Example:
He wasn't abusive or a bad guy. He just refused to adult with me. I had to tell him what to do all the time. He refused to just do the damn thing. If I asked him why he didn't feed or bathe our children he would say "Well, you didn't ask me to."
That's because he wanted her to grovel and beg. He wanted her to be in a pathetic position, and he wanted to label her a nag. This childish petty game made him feel like a king. (But look like a fool) You shouldn't have to ask a man to feed his own children. You shouldn't have to ask a man to brush his teeth when he tries to tongue you first thing in the morning. He wants you to plead with him, just so he can say "Guffaw! Shes sOoOo needy for asking me for the bare minimum. Pfft."
Its on purpose. He doesn't do this with his employer, if he did he wouldn't have a job. :)
I've posted this before and I'm sorry for spamming. We deserve to have fun and be happy. (Actual happiness, not "I'm dying inside, aren't I a good woman, fellas?") A man should be more than just burden after burden, he should provide something, anything, more than fart-warmed sheets and a constant trail of debris. He is a man, not a tornado of sulfur. (Stink-nado)
The first step to escaping a Sick System is being aware that you are in one. Sick systems and financial abuse are pretty much the same thing. Its trap. Abusers never slap you on the first date. It always starts out with small acts of disrespect.
https://www.issendai.com/psychology/sick-systems.html
A couple at the church I used to go to had twin girls. The wife had almost died during their birth, but the husband still refused to do any child care whatsoever. two things I remember about them: her struggling to carry the girls’ car seats into the building while he let the door swing shut in her face, and her never getting to sit down during the entire service because as soon as one baby stopped crying, he would hand the other baby to her (who was crying by now). He didn’t even bring in a decent income: they bought their house with her savings, while he had a low-level labor job (just something like construction site clearing; nothing that paid well). They eventually had to move because they couldn’t afford their mortgage anymore. A few men in that church were involved with some (possibly illegal) day trading schemes, so that might have brought in some money (it also might have been why they had to move suddenly: I noticed that all the guys involved in the scheme ended up skipping town and moving out of state at around the same time). The whole time, nobody at church even acknowledged that their relationship was fucked up: they just praised how “submissive” she was, and how “god takes care of families who do it right”. Pretty much put me off of marriage and religion for the rest of my life. I couldn’t stand that they continued to think men were created smarter than women, while letting dumbass men ruin womens’ lives.
“A man should be more than just burden after burden, he should provide something, anything” Ha, that reminds me how I asked a man to hand me a towel after taking a shower and he was like “you really like men to do things for you huh“ and I looked him dead in the eye and said “yeah, that’s your purpose” 😒