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Hi there! It’s possible many of you already do this, but I’ve found a ton of value by joining my local Facebook group, “Are We Dating the Same Guy.”
Women post pics and first names of scrotes who have lied, cheated, abused, or have other toxic problems, to warn other women to stay away. You can search by name of your latest male interest, to see if anything pops up, and also ask if anyone knows him or has feedback.
Benefits:
Searched up toxic exes. Bingo, they were nearly all there, in red flag glory. Very affirming when I doubted myself. I can also see how far I’ve come with FDS, now empowered to vet!
When randos hit on me, I search them up. Most of the time they’re scrotes, and dozens of women have already posted warnings. Safety.
Occasionally there is a good man posted, and women say they’ve known the guy for years and he’s a good person. Women usually caveat that they don’t know him romantically - but at least you can proceed (with normal caution & vetting)
Confirmation of FDS principles! You’ll begin to see patterns, that guys will say/do anything to get laid, will lie cheat, beat and steal, and deny deny deny. It’s a great education
The group gives me hope that we women are creating a better, safer world by having each others’ backs
Downsides:
Occasionally a mole will report a post and warn the guy. But the admins vet & block these pickmes
You’ll see a LOT of women asking about fugly men. In these groups, you’re not allowed to run down a man’s looks. Hoo! It’s hard sometimes because these guys are DIARRHEA UGLY. 😂
They also post photos of some of the ugliest men I've ever seen. I'm always tempted to ask what they saw in him and if they had their eyes checked out. Too bad we can't.
I’d 100% sign up if this was available in my area. But I’d like to avoid Facebook - deleted my account now that Meta wants to start using any uploaded pictures for AI training.
I've tried a couple times to get into my local group, they won't let me in. Not sure why. I'll try again if I start dating again.
Florida has a known app dater who deliberately assaulted his dates with 💩 poop. I kid you not. He has an arrest record, too, for assault etc.
I’ve seen guys I know but never dated on there. Everything said was true.
I just went and signed up to see what my exes have been up to. Excited.
How can we search by location ?
I just got MAJORLY used by my (now ex) boyfriend - it came out he was still trying to get his ex gf back while we were dating despite telling me on one of our first dates his last relationship ended months ago and they cut all contact at that point. He kept a bunch of sex tapes they made together on his phone all throughout our relationship which he knew would have been an immediate dealbreaker for me had I found them sooner. He got caught in a bunch of other lies too like taking another girl out for drinks behind my back.
My local group has two AWDTSG groups, one is only like 3K people and the other is 48K. I can't get accepted into the big one because I don't use my account very often. I am strongly considering posting him at least to the smaller group.
Anyone know if this is available in IRELAND? Should be a fixture permanently in dating to have this vetting tool , preferably not on Facebook for those of us who aren't. Love this idea
Search FB for “Are we Dating the Same Guy.” The search engine defaults to local groups near your area. Pick the one most relevant to you and ask to join. Make sure you read & follow the rules