a couple more ways to vet men's real intentions

I'm not sure if this has been posted before, and I'm now a sometime reader. I binged on FDS when I found it on Reddit, and have kept up with the podcasts (I miss them!). I'm now logging in every few months to catch up, so I'm here, but just dip in occasionally.

First of all, I've noticed that in chat (its own world, so full of id and so lacking in superego), I can spot a desperate man broody to settle down from the first few passes of convo. I've noticed if a man asks me first and foremost what I call autobiographical info, specifically marital status, chances are he's looking and looking hard. Chances also are he's using anything but dating sites because he's a cheapskate, and because he's tried and failed to meet women in real life. So many men online are desperate for green cards, money, but mostly just attention. Chances are often good, too, that in asking marital status, he may very well be conventional, traditional, conservative, and rather staid.

It's also worth noting that if a man asks about me as a person (rare), that's more of a green flag in wanting to know me for me. What are your hobbies, your interests, do you like this or that. Trying to establish likes in common is great. However, latching on to one thing of a woman's likes, and saying he hates that or would never do that is a big red flag; it's a way of putting distance between himself and someone else. If a man does that, I quite often just leave the entire conversation without bothering to say goodbye. I'm just done, and doing that is a dealbreaker for me. These same type of men, when they find out I was a teacher, say things like, "Man, I HATED my teacher" and carry a lot of unresolved educational trauma they project outwards (how else), never bothering to self-reflect, work on healing, forgiveness, or owning their part of anything. Their being openly hostile or rude or saying things that create detachment are all dealbreakers to me.

Another thing I've noticed is that men who seem pissed off, or even just confused by my being a woman who isn't constantly laboring and/or working is a giant red flag. Lots of those broody to settle down men are gigantic manbabies who want to be taken care of. The fact that I say I'm retired, and yeah, maybe, I guess I wouldn't mind another relationship, provided we had a living apart together relationship -- then they seem less than thrilled about this, red flag every single time. They're centering their needs and wants, ie cooking, cleaning, caregiving, and my being totally unwilling to be a Mommy McBangmaid upsets them no end.

Add to that, finally, any questions about finances, when first getting to know someone, giant red flag. I just say my finances are my business, and provide zero details. I might say occasionally that I have a pension, since I'm retired, but that's it. My first thought is that these guys are lazy ass mooches, hobosexuals, and video game addicts who want a woman to keep them in the manner to which they've become accustomed.

Thanks for reading, ladies. Love to all, and keep those standards sky-high!