The media and patriarchy gives us such a mixed view of ageing, I would like to write a bit on an alternative view point of ageing and what it means to me spiritually. Even if you do not subscribe to alternative spirituality, I hope you can read this and let it help shape your own paradigm and what ageing means to you. Ageing is not something to avoid – it is a gift that not everyone is lucky enough to experience. It is the true product of living and you need to shape the experience for yourself. We all are going to age, the only part we are in control of is how we view it.
The Triple Goddess lies in every woman. There are three cycles that are often represented by the waxing, full, and waning moon.
The Maiden
The Maiden is the only woman truly valued by the patriarchy but in my schema, she is the lowest in value. The Maiden is the woman coming fresh out of childhood and learning the extent of her feminine power. She is full of life, youth, and beauty. She is learning to harvest her energy. However, she is naive and inexperienced. She is symbolized by the waxing phase of the moon and new beginnings. Women in this stage need to be protected by the other stages. The framework she learns here will impact her for the rest of her life.
The Mother
The Mother is pseudo valued in society in an almost patronizing way. She is the part of our life cycles represented by full moons and big decisions. Even if you do not have children, she represents a fulfilling of feminine energy and a stage where you are learning to direct it. For me, this means a focus on my career and the quality of my relationships (specifically with friends and family). She has made it through the maiden phase and realized that the feminine beauty is within her. When I think of the mother I think big, thoughtful moves and stepping into power.
The Crone
This is the stage we are all working towards. The Crone, the goal, the waning moon, the deep mysteries of life. She radiates from her inner being. She has survived maidenhood, thrived in motherhood, and come out the other side with wisdom and grace to teach and protect. These are the women that should be our matriarchs. Politicians, heads of families, and teachers. She is often symbolized in darkness. While some fear her, what she is better suited towards is revered respect. I plan to teach at the collegiate level in my crone phase and I look at each day as a new learning experience to shape me into the crone I want to be. Where I can eventually guide, protect, give my wisdom to the world, and be fully in my power.
Patriarchy wants you to stop at the maiden stage. To spend motherhood trying desperately to cling to the maiden stage and to fall into obscurity as a crone. Do not accept that. Wherever you are, you are not yet complete in your feminine power. Shape your life in ways to help you become the woman you want to be. Be excited for the future, not clinging to the past.
I spent many summers in a women-only space that honored women transitioning into their crone phase of life with a reverent ceremony and a celebration.