.png)
My gosh. Anyway this kind of stuff is old news for a place like FDS, but bears repeating ad infinitum.
I can assure you, if you are a woman and you do not want a man incessantly continuing the conversation that you only intended for the smallest of small talk (and be careful never to initiate that small talk), please try not to even make eye contact with them, but if you can't avoid the eye contact, please just be a grey rock, because they never leave you alone if you think you're conversing with them.
This man in the grocery store who was so talkative with me was offering to help take two carts of groceries to my car (it was a very burdensome grocery trip) and I politely declined no, and it seemed to take work for him to accept it.
When I was rolling my first cart to the greeter (for him to watch over, while I went to get the second cart), a couple with a soft demeanor about them (who was behind the talkative man in the checkout) offered to help me. Somehow, I felt alright with those people, but not the man in the previous paragraph. As they were helping me put stuff in my trunk, I told them that I was worried that the other man would see that they were helping me. The male of the couple assured me that he saw the man leave the parking lot.
It was almost 11 o'clock at night; there's no way I'd accept the talkative man's offer to help me out. Was I taking a risk with the couple? Maybe technically, but their vibe did not give off red flags.
that's why i'm always cold and come off as rude to most people. best, safest thing to do as a woman.
I was on my way back from a business trip in a train late at night once. The wagon was almost completely empty and I had my suitcase (which was heavy and contained valuable work stuff that shouldn't leave my eyesight) in front of the empty seat next to me. It wasn't blocking anything, it was secured so it couldn't fall or roll away, everything was fine. Until this guy (not a conductor or anything, he wore business clothes) entered at one stop, looked around the wagon, came right to me and said "Let me put this up for you!" while trying to grab my case. I put my hand on it and firmly said "No thank you. It's fine".
That should have been the end of it. It wasn't.
That guy started a huge discussion that he could get it down for me, too, if I was worried that I couldn't get it down again myself and that I would have so much more room if the put the suitcase up, blablabla. At the end I had to get loud and told him to leave me the hell alone and he called me "extremely rude" because he was "just trying to help". Yeah... right.
I don't know if he was trying to steal my suitcase or use it as an excuse to sit down next to me and hit on me for the rest of the train ride or if he was just a really weird guy. I don't really care either.
That guy sounds really creepy. Any man should know that it’s going to make a woman incredibly uncomfortable for a stranger to offer to help them alone late at night like that, but they don’t care. You’re supposed to be SO grateful to them for offering to help.
I had a really terrifying moment when I lived within walking distance of a mall that was across the street from my apartment. I was at the crosswalk across the road from my complex and this man comes out of nowhere and greeted me. I just kind of nodded at him then looked away. He then proceeds to tell me “My girlfriend just broke up with me” and lingered there. I just kind of mumbled “Sorry.” I’m always afraid that ignoring them will make them angry. He hung around for a bit and kept trying to talk, but I was very cold. He finally left. I was SO terrified that he would follow me home because something about him was just very, very unsettling.
That's why I ignore men in general, giving them attention is like an open invitation to cross your boundaries. I don't go on dates for fun but that's an open invitation to sex. I don't let men be "nice" to me or help me with anything because that means I need to pay them back with a phone number or a booty call.
One dude even admitted he would like to destroy my body by giving me a baby. I got a "breedable" body being nice and tight.
Why do men behave this way? Because men are predators by default. When I help someone even when I find that person attractive I don't feel entitled to sex. I only feel entitled to respect when I meet people.