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This is from the social Qs in the NYTimes written by Philip Galanes, a gay dude and it absolutely infuriates me!! NYTimes is absolutely grooming women to be pickmes, its just as bad as Reddit y’all. Look at them gaslighting this old lady into going 50/50. Excerpt from column (below).
An Odd View of Even-Steven
I am a 71-year-old widow with a caring new boyfriend of five months. We live in the same condo complex; it offers many (free) activities and clubs that we participate in. But when I suggest dates outside the condo, he asks how much they will cost and suggests we go Dutch treat. I am confused by this. He receives a good pension and Social Security payments. I am willing to share costs, but I would like to be the one who makes that decision. Your thoughts?
GIRLFRIEND
No one told me it was Gender Week! Forgive me if I misunderstand you, but you seem to be suggesting that you should decide who pays for dates because you are a woman. Do I have that right? You don’t mention being broke or shouldering other costs — such as regularly cooking or gardening for your boyfriend, for instance.
I hope you will reconsider your view. We all like to be treated once in a while, but you are an independent woman. Why do you require a man to pay for you — and why should he? Try to enjoy your new relationship with this “caring” fellow on an equal financial footing. If you can’t manage that, talk to him about it. But beats me how you make your request without making him feel like an A.T.M.
Lesson:
GIVE AN INCH AND THEY WILL TAKE A MILE. Ladies, just look at how stingy this boyfriend of hers is, only wanting to do free activities in the condo and asking the woman to go Dutch even before the first date!! Look at how accommodating this woman is, gently saying that she is “willing to share costs, but I would like to be the one who makes that decision” which is a nice way to phrase how disappointed she must be at her “boyfriend’s” absolutely stinginess and unwillingness to invest even a modicum of effort in her. And look at response by Philip Galenes who accuses her of “making him feel like an A.T.M”.
What about her??? How is his stinginess and lack of effort to court her making HER feel? You cannot win with these people!!!! They are absolutely male centred, big scrote energy and they will drag you to miserable pickme hell if you listen to their advice.
SAY NO to 50/50 and say it FIRMLY. DO NOT GIVE QUARTER. The moment you to try to bargain with stingy men and ask scrotes for advice you’ve lost, welcome to a life of low effort dates with a man who only wants to do free activities in the condo.
Also, gay men can be scrotes, they simply do not understand the nuances of the female perspective. All men are. No brownie points for sexuality here. Case in point: THIS article!
Link to article:
I hope the lady doesn't listen to any of that nonsense. To be honest I'm not surprised that a gay man thinks like that. The majority of them dislike women as well, they are usually even more open about their sexism and misogyny than straight men, because they don't have to hide their true self from us. Just look at drag performances, that shows what they think about us. It's also not a secret that a lot of gay men support the "red pill" ideology. They usually don't support us, they prefer to support other men and men that like to put on a woman face.
not surprising since most gay men pander to cishet men because they project their past trauma of being rejected by the hot straight scrote. they fall under the pickme category except i find them much sadder because they're also misogynistic. like hello, you could always stand in solidarity with women yet you choose not to.
I've already stated this before, but it bears repeating: These scrotes are absolutely punishing us as women for having the audacity for desiring equality and for making things possible for us all within the past 50+ years with the three waves of feminism. Because if feminism and female empowerment and liberation never happened, we wouldn't be having this conversation at all. For exactly one dinner date, we owe men and society our freedom and ultimate autonomy. As soon as a penny enters our purse that doesn't come from family or a man that is courting us, we get treated like... this.
Never forget that they want us to go 50/50 with the finances but never for anything else. Never 50/50 with the household chores. Never 50/50 with the orgasm gap. Never 50/50 with taking care of babies and children. No, none of those things, never ever. If we want all of that yummy stuff, we must surrender ourselves completely and pray he doesn't wound up kicking us out on the streets when he inevitably gets bored of us.
This drives me nuts, gay men giving rElAtIoNsHiP aDvIcE to straight women, as if they have any insight at all into hetero relationships. This is a man living a male-centered life - his advice is worthless to us. What this guy, like so many men, fails to see is that in the patriarchy there a very, very few social conventions that superficially, insignificantly benefit women, and we're not willing to give them up in the name of gEnDeR eQuAlItY. No, feminists (nor women at large) are not going to fight against the convention of leaving the toilet seat down, we're not going to demand to take the trash down to the curb to prove we're capable, and we're not gonna pay for half the meal. Tell you what scrotes - you give up your higher earning potential and control of all the world's governments, and stop abusing and assaulting us, and then we'll talk about going 50/50 on a damn seniors' brunch at the diner.
I honestly never trust relationship advice from gay men. They prioritize and love men too much and do not give advice that benefits or centers women. Color me forever skeptical of gay male advice columnists.
I read a pickme respond to an article in my local paper where a woman’s husband had an affair with her son’s wife. The advice was there was a chance to forgive the husband and not tell her son his wife is dirty.
I'll go 50/50 with a man, but that's with NO sexual activity and the caveat that if I meet a new man whilst I'm out with my 50/50 friend that he can't be mad at me for ditching him. It's sad that even old men who's dicks don't work are still trying to finesse women in the retirement community. No wonder my grandmother used to say she'd never want another man even if his dick was diamond encrusted, and my mother once told me, "All the good men are in the cemetery."
Gay men could benefit from FDS-style principles. Maybe they need their own version, lol. I've heard many a twink angsting that men on the 'scene' only want casual sex and love and commitment are super difficult to come by....what with all the pickmes and hookup culture etc. That said, this man is dispensing terrible advice, and that goes for pretty much everything I read in mainstream media. Mainstream media is a dumpster fire and the only place to get solid dating advice is FDS or Baggage Reclaim.