Imagine living like this!!

This was my comment to that post. Of course I got downvoted, surprise surprise 🙄

This man will never learn unless he hits rock bottom. This might mean him losing this new job or worse, but this woman should not stick around for his race to the bottom. Imagine how much more she could accomplish in her life if she re-invested this time and energy back into herself? This man is negative value, it is costing her a lot to be with him in opportunities, resources and her mental well-being. She should drop this guy off on his mother’s doorstep. The fact he has no clean underwear is beyond disgusting 🤮 I wouldn’t even let that biohazard in my car while I’m on my way to his mother’s doorstep. He’d have to sit in the back trailer on the way there.

I actually went through something similar as OP. It’s hard to just leave someone like that. So I get it.

But I never regretted leaving him and only wished I had done sooner. But I was young and put up with a lot.

He‘d always be in and out of jobs and would never do anything around the home. He would say he’s depressed so he didn’t want to work or clean. It drove me insane. Like he would get fired because as soon as he got a job he’d Start going in late or calling in sick. That sort of stuff. He couldn’t keep a job long term.

Even when I left he didn’t have a job but I already found a new apartment before I broke up with him and told him I’d be out soon. So he better figure something out. While we were dating he was having an emotional affair so when I left he just went to mooch off her.

This is why you NEVER give any sympathy and when they aren’t pulling their weight you drop them. There’s plenty of other women who will do everything for them. Don’t be those women.

He is not depressed, he is a lazy lvm who wants a bang maid. Let's stop excusing the lvm behavior with mental illnesses. Thanks.

Also notice though the op wrote it sounds like she's been cooking, cleaning, and doing all the chores for a while.

The lesson is not to be any man's maid. Don't pick up after him don't cook and cleanup after him.

If a man shows any red flags especially of being lazy or a slob, you need to drop him immediately. Otherwise, ops reality of a stanky man child can be a possibility.

I had an ex like that before fds. I'd spend the weekends at his apartment, and after a while I noticed it started getting sloppier each time I came over. I Realized he hadn't been cleaning it. The one time it was so gross, I hit my breaking point and headed home. Being a pickme I ended up communicating saying that his apartment was making me feel sick - the cat litter smell and all the dust and dander was churning my stomach. He of course tried saying that if it bothered me I was welcome to clean up for him.

I stopped talking with him and I stopped going over. Being a pickme though I foolishly took him back and he was hanging out in my clean dorm. Anyways he was always a slob for the rest of the relationship and it was one of the reasons I ended up breaking up woth him. Thankfully he was so snobby he left another chick's panties in his bed area and I had seen them - seeing it was thankfully finally enough to get my stupid self to end it for good. Lesson learned.

IME men don't help us manage our lives unless they give us wanted "help" to control us. For instance, i had a messy handbag with receipts and would go through it time to time. Years ago, my NVM wx literally forced me to sort through my handbag with him and throw things out. I ddint ask him for help-- he just liked controlling me. Whenever i was worried about his health or wanted to make my own choices, i was always "wrong." In spite of that I accomplished so much more than he did and multiple people tried to talk sense into me for dating him. Sadly too many "mutual friends" were silent bystanders when he called me stupid at Uni between classes.

So, why should she parent him and help him with things that are his responsibility, as a grown adult? Even if he genuinely has functioning issues, he should be able to speak up and find help, not expect her to mind read and remember all his deadlines. This is maddening in so many ways. I don't know how these women get on with such passive men :(

🤢