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I had been very good friends with ‘Ben’ for 7 years. We have been incredibly close and I considered him a HVM. He was thoughtful and respectful to his girlfriend, a supportive and dependable friend to me and an all round nice human being to have in my life. We had been there for eachother through thick and thin and he had never been anything but a gentleman. HOWEVER
It turns out Ben had been spending his spare time photoshopping pictures of me onto horrible, graphic fetish pictures and sending them to men online. He had been pretending to be me, giving out personal information such as info about my family and my job. The only reason I found this out was because one of the men he had been messaging reverse image searched a picture that was sent to him and found my insta profile. Ben admitted to the entire thing when I was telling him and his girlfriend about the police report and how this could affect my job. He blamed a porn addiction and gave me a sob story about how much he’s struggled, all whilst putting my safety and career at risk. Ben and his girlfriend remain together. He is blocked on everything and out of my life. Police investigation was completed and closed. CONTINUOUSLY VET THE MEN IN YOUR LIFE DO NOT LET YOUR GUARD DOWN EVER!!!!
"A cautionary tale about vetting your male friends" - what male friends?
There is no such thing, as you so astutely pointed out. 🤢
Wow, just another reason for me not to put my picture up online. I never ever found the need to put my picture online for others to see.
What the actual fuck. Thank you for sharing and I'm sorry this happened to you. My mind is reeling I don't even know what else to say
There's no such thing as a male friend.
Women should be extremely cautious posting pics of themselves online. Use a pseudonym and a pic of something that is not you, ladies.
I don't think you can find decent male friends these days. I joined a band, but I have to leave only two weeks in, because the misogyny is unbearable. The constant negs, sexism and perverted jokes. And it makes me so sad, because I love doing gigs.
Gee girl. I am sorry you went through this. None of us is safe. I exited a group of friends when I found out they took Instagram pictures of me and put them in their fap folder. They did screenshot of other women too and fapped to them. They were convinced I would feel honored to be in that folder. No, I wasn't. To this day they do not understand why. No woman is off limits. This is why I refuse to engage with men as "friends". If I were you, I would grey rock that pickme friend hard. She doesn't deserve your presence.
Ben and Jerry's more like Ben be Scaries
I’m sorry to hear that this happened to you, absolutely sickening.. Why am I not surprised to see the gf stayed with that scrote though😣
I’m really sorry this happened to you. I’m glad there was a police report so there is no confusion with future job prospects. My best advice is to surround yourself with ONLY friends who are women. I don’t think it’s super safe to be friends with men since they will most likely end up taking advantage of you
Yes, hard agree, you wouldn’t believe how many men really just ain’t sh** A hard majority of men do not care about your safety or well being as a woman, and I had to learn that the hard way this week 😭
Wow, this is terrifying.
This makes me so sick. unfortunately I have sent nudes in my pick me past. I constantly worry that someone will post revenge porn of me, or they already have and I just don’t know about it yet.
I’m so sorry this happened to you and that both him & miss girl are too stupid to see how gross it is.
Ugh, this level of unconscionable bastardry and the associated shock and betrayal trauma would knock me off my feet. I hope you are getting all the support and care you need right now. Thank you for sharing your experience and reminding us of the importance of staying aware and open.
I am so sorry this happened to you. How are you dealing with this? Did you file a police complaint?
What an absolute low value POS. This post PROVES that you can never be certain…meaning vetting is a lifelong process with ALL men. It’s a permanent practice we have to use. Pretty sad, but is what it is. Thank you for sharing this. We all need this reminder but I’m sorry to hear he turned out to be such a douche. Last thing; his girlfriend needs FDS. Ugh
“He blamed a porn addiction” Notice how he immediately victimises himself, behaves as though his actions are separate to himself, and has absolutely no empathy for you. I am so sorry this happened to you. That is mortifying.