It's such a lose-lose situation for women. Obviously, she should get out of there. But chances are it WILL effect her future employment prospects. She could be asked to explain why she left after such a short period of time, and most people (male and female, because our world is so effed up) will either not believe her or think she was asking for it. Sucks. But yeah, like I said, she needs to get the heck out of dodge, regardless of how it might effect her later.
It's easy to say "she should fight back" and "she should report him to HR/the police/his superiors" but that could mean the end of her career she has already invested years of her life and (potentially) a lot of money (student loans etc.) and effort in, especially in a small field. Even if the boss gets punished or fired - which is unlikely in this world - her whole reputation will be tainted after that. It is very, very likely that HR will happily sacrifice the intern to protect the boss. HR is not on your side. That's not their job. They are always on the company's side.
In a perfect world she should report him, punch him in the nuts and quit, yes. That's essentially winning the battle but losing the war (and likely her career prospects). The world is not perfect and she has to look for a solution that benefits her the most long-term, even if that means avoiding him and trying to deescalate for a few more months until her internship is finished and she can get out of there with a good reference. Been there, done that.
We - as women - can only facilitate long-term change if we don't quit but rise through the ranks into positions of power where we can make an actual difference for the generations of women who come after us and make sure the next generation of interns doesn't get treated that way, the next generation of male employees knows they will get fired at the slightest indiscretion and creepy scrotes like her boss are the ones we don't do business with. The best revenge is not letting yourself be bullied out of your dream career and thriving. And never forgetting the people who hurt your or didn't protect you. You will meet again and if you are in a position of power by then you will be able to let them feel the consequences of what they did.
Unknown member
Feb 20, 2023
Replying to
The thing is, you're right, but immediately punching in the nuts needs to become the normal, accepted thing. And the slow, gradual, rising to the top that everyone thinks women are doing isn't happening. Not really. It's not enough.
Unknown member
Feb 20, 2023
As I get older and wiser, it gets harder to continue to witness our patriarchal society churn out these extremely naive young girls. I want to save them all! As a woman in my 40s I know NOW that men in their 50s lust after girls in their 20s, and that all of that behavior are giant red flags. But at 21, I had no clue. And neither does she. She keeps trying to write it off as, "maybe he's just a flirty guy?" But all I see is a pervert who has zero respect for boundaries, probably married with kids, and like a vampire, wants to drain this girl for her youthful energy.
I agree. I got ANGRY reading this, and not just at the man in question, but the fact that this poor young woman hasn't been educated on what is predatory by her family, school, society at large, etc. Gross all-around.
Unknown member
Feb 21, 2023
Replying to
I wasn't taught either. I had to raise myself from the age of 9. I was very naive well into my 30s. I thought I wasnt by the time I reached 40, but nope. There was still a level of naivety, that I fell for a NVM who wasted my life for 6 years. Only 18 months NC from that guy. Found FDS and Princella, and finally feel like I have some guidance.
I hate these old creepy bosses. This happened to me - I froze in the moment (I was so shocked!) and reported him to HR. Of course, nothing was done. He’s still in leadership, I left the company.
Disgusting scrote. I remember when my 50 something year old boss tried to kiss me. I think I was late teens/early 20s when it happened 🤮My biggest regret was not reporting it to the police. I was a uni student alone in a new country and my scholarships only covered my tuition. I came from a very poor background, plus I had bills to pay so he knew that I desperately needed the job and couldn't leave.
It's such a lose-lose situation for women. Obviously, she should get out of there. But chances are it WILL effect her future employment prospects. She could be asked to explain why she left after such a short period of time, and most people (male and female, because our world is so effed up) will either not believe her or think she was asking for it. Sucks. But yeah, like I said, she needs to get the heck out of dodge, regardless of how it might effect her later.
As I get older and wiser, it gets harder to continue to witness our patriarchal society churn out these extremely naive young girls. I want to save them all! As a woman in my 40s I know NOW that men in their 50s lust after girls in their 20s, and that all of that behavior are giant red flags. But at 21, I had no clue. And neither does she. She keeps trying to write it off as, "maybe he's just a flirty guy?" But all I see is a pervert who has zero respect for boundaries, probably married with kids, and like a vampire, wants to drain this girl for her youthful energy.
Oh my goodness, this is so creepy. I'd be so uncomfortable.
I hate these old creepy bosses. This happened to me - I froze in the moment (I was so shocked!) and reported him to HR. Of course, nothing was done. He’s still in leadership, I left the company.
Disgusting scrote. I remember when my 50 something year old boss tried to kiss me. I think I was late teens/early 20s when it happened 🤮 My biggest regret was not reporting it to the police. I was a uni student alone in a new country and my scholarships only covered my tuition. I came from a very poor background, plus I had bills to pay so he knew that I desperately needed the job and couldn't leave.