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I just got back from another date with a guy four months older than me.
Everything was going well. We met last week at a party. He proceeded to ask me for my number before I left the party on Friday. The last Sunday, he asked me if was free to have dinner/lunch with him today. He took care of everything, was conscientious about my likes and dislikes. He was very outgoing, and a gentleman. He took to me to this fancy Italian place. No doubt, the food was good, however he mispronounced some of the Italian names of the dishes when he was ordering. To be fair, English is not his first language, and I know it's hard let alone pronouncing Italian words. His mispronunciation was making the Italian waiter cringe, and after he ordered, I stepped in corrected him. Some of the words I remembered him butchering was bruschetta and gnocchi. To me, it wasn't a big deal since it's normal. I just wanted to give him a heads up just in case it ever happens again. However, he just brushed me off and continued on towards other conversation topics. I didn't want to press on and thought it was over. Anyways, after the end of early dinner, as he was walking me towards my car, we were talking about what foods he liked since it was his time trying it. This is where things go downhill. Again, he pronounced gnocchi incorrectly at least three times, and it was bothering me, so I playfully corrected him. Things just went silent as he walked me to my car which was a good three blocks. We said our goodbyes and that was that.
I don't know if I'll be seeing him again. If it were me, and someone corrected me, I wouldn't mind. I'd probably laugh it off and thank him.
I'm just flabbergasted at his behaviour.
He's deeply insecure which means he needs to have control at all times. You correcting him removed that control and he was spiralling in that silence. Not a good sign at all.
I dunno, this isn't flabbergasted level for me. Clearly not a love match, so fine and dandy there. But I can see not wanting to belabor the point that he was messing it up/being slightly embarrassed when he was trying to impress you (and with the background given, pronounciation of words is probably a big insecurity he has). It doesn't sound like he made a deal about it.
It's not your job to coddle his insecurities, but this one isn't "oh my god what a fucking scrote" level to me.
Also, how did he pronounce bruschetta and what did you say the correct way was?
It was rude of the waiter to cringe. The waiter should have corrected him, not you.
I don't know... I don't openly correct people's pronounciations in general if they don't explicitely ask me to beforehand. I think it's a rude thing to do unasked, especially if you are dealing with someone pronouncing words in a language they don't speak. I'm sure I have butchered my share of names of dishes in Asian or Ethiopian restaurants and I would absolutely find it rude if someone loudly pointed that out.
I draw my conclusions (and yes, if the mispronounciations are so grave they make him seem uneducated or are embarrassing in a public context, it would be a dealbreaker for me. Sue me.). I sometimes also use the word in a sentence on purpose and pronounce it correctly later (if I am absolutely sure that I know how to pronounce it) and let the other person draw their own conclusions and save face.
Both English and Italian weren't his first languages, I wouldn't have said anything.
I'm no Italian language expert, but if his pronunciation made the waiter cringe, then it would have made me cringe, too.
Cringe is bad when you're trying to impress. Clearly, he was out of his element.
If he gives you the ick, you need to block and delete. Do not let anyone talk you out of your standards.
Yes always trust your intution.