Looking for red flags on Instagram is GENIUS - just do it!

Sometimes these proudly "Christian" men are anything but. I went on several promising dates over a couple of months with a prominent "Christian" pillar of his church and community. C-suite executive at a major company, great reputation, took good care of himself, seemingly good father to his grown children, treated me very well. And then the first time I went to his place for a drink before a theater date, he got huffy and offended when I wouldn't "suck it" (his words) shortly after he'd poured the first glass of wine. I laughed in his face and took an Uber home, blocked, deleted, and swore off OLD forever. Met my current boyfriend shortly after and can't believe I ever entertained the previous scrote.

Never. Stop. Vetting.

argh. omg. these scrotes are so good at acting!!!!

I noticed the bizarre habit of my ex after breaking up where he would follow soft core pages, these were not just hot women in sexy poses. These were like totally bizarre women, one was a gyrating torso in Scrubs with totally inappropriate captions about patience with erectile dysfunction, one was a 40 something woman flashing her crotch through the banister railings, leaning back in a chair to flash her crotch. One was an Asian woman just absolutely rubbing her stomach with zero facial expression in the mirror, so f****** weird. One was a very sad looking woman seemingly in her late 40s with huge boobs, her face was so sad in every single picture. When I checked back a few weeks later, he had completely unfollowed these women with his follower count decreasing by like 50. I thought maybe he just got horny after the breakup but then I remembered how on our fourth date he had emojis in his recent keyboard history that were questionable 🤤💦🥵 and I realized he probably follows these women simply to DM them and unfollows as soon as they ignore or reject him. Totally bizarre behavior and I'm sure it didn't start when I knew him. But he is obviously very cautious about following too many of these women or else why would you literally ever unfollow? Or even follow in the first place if you were just trying to jack off for an evening? My intuition says he was trying to DM them and knows they are more likely to respond if he's following. And when I dm'd him to tell him off after our breakup, he did not put his profile on private, it's like a travelgram wannabe page with less than 500 followers. I'm guessing he doesn't want to go on private because then women wouldn't see his interesting travel photographs LOL and have no reason to respond..

@Space97 I made fake social media pages using a photo from thispersondoesnotexist.com because I would NEVER use a real person’s photo & Facebook wouldn’t let me make a page without a photo of a face as a profile photo. I don’t know if they still do that, I deleted my Facebook in 2020, but then I had to make one to communicate with a business I couldn’t get in touch with otherwise. When I tried to make one with no photo or a photo of a flower it denied me. I’m not trying to catfish for dates so I purposely chose a fake woman who just looks like a normal person, not some hot girl. People I talk to you know I am not on Facebook, some guy was hitting on me at work that I thought I might date. Then I went and looked at his Facebook page with my fake person and I decided absolutely not.

Even if you don’t need a fake photo for anything, cruising through that website for a second, if you are not used to looking at AI generated photos, will help you get good at picking out fake photos on the internet.

@Maggie JK Yep, this is the way to go. Have a fake social media profile for checking out the guys profiles. It is a great vetting tool.

I did this on a dating site to check if my boyfriend was using it behind my back (yes!).

I made such an outrageous profile ("Ideal date: Visit me in prison, I'll bring a muffin from the cafeteria") so as not to confuse any decent guys.

I left the profile up (pause it for a month at a time, un pause, take a spin to see who is on it, pause it.)

Have learned:

Many men who say they are new to online dating are not.

Men use so many similar lines it's eerie. ("See where it goes." "Loyal to a fault." "No baggage." Etc)

Bonus: see who in my small town is "single," and who are inveterate womanizers.

Guys I know to avoid if I see them in the wild.

Sorry, I think that was so off-topic it probably doesn’t belong here. Your post just triggered that memory for me, from 10 years ago. And maybe it can be a warning for others. Don’t even let them around “artistic porn”, it turns them into freak shows.

@Maggie JK I agree 100%. If they find sexual images "artistic," pass.

Interesting, why's that? I guess I was screening for soft core type pages, not thinking about celebrities.