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Been on six dates with this man. Haven't had sex with him. He asked me to be exclusive/be his girlfriend on date #5 (Friday). I said yes. He and I both have trips planned, his is tomorrow through Sunday and mine is December 8th - 14th. Last time I saw him was on Sunday, he walked me to my car after our date and basically hit me with a "welp, guess I'll see ya when I see ya" (I'm paraphrasing but that was the gist of it). And since then has made no attempt to even set up a time to video call or see each other for a bit in the three days between after he gets back but before I leave for my trip. Or plan something for when I get back. I'm honestly just looking for reassurance that I'm not crazy for being super bothered by this and thinking it's a gigantic red flag, before I block him. Thanks in advance!
Update: okay, don't hate me, ladies. I went against FDS guidelines and I asked the guy about it over text. Curiosity got the better of me. He used a lot of crying emojis and basically just kept saying that it didn't occur to him to show interest in seeing me. I'm laughing pretty hard right now. At least it was entertaining.
Asking to be exclusive before they go away on vacation is a scrote move to make you wait.
A lot of guys use Tinder to date on vacation for some one night stands. Why would he ask for exclusivity right before you won’t see each other for a while?
You shouldn’t be exclusive with one guy after 5 dates. You need at least consistency of 3-6 months minimum. Just because he asked, it doesn’t mean he is sincere. You can always say no I’m not ready. I would tell him that you are no longer interested then block and delete .
He's mate guarding so you won't date anyone else while he's off scroting around with vacation women on Tinder. Not only are you not boyfriend and girlfriend after six dates (what) but he treats you like a coworker and you're questioning yourself. No, you are not crazy. He's low effort and shady and I would block and delete any guy who doesn't try to contact you every day once you are exclusive, because he's not putting in the work and he isn't good enough for you. Good men show consistent interest over long periods of time. Scrotes blow hot and cold because they know it keeps pickmes addicted to the roller coaster.
Next.
It's not crazy at all that you're bothered by this, it sounds like he figures since you're bf/gf that he can put less effort in!
How does he normally act? Is this different from how he was on the dates? Could be his real lazy self coming through now that he thinks he has you locked down.
Honestly the "see ya when I see ya" (or whatever he actually said lol) kills me, that's almost worse than the rest. 💀 Low effort AND doesn't even sound like he's going to miss you.
How does one go exclusive after 5 days? Or even 5 dates? Not enough vetting has been done.
He's probably not interested. Oh well, next.
How convenient for him to go exclusive right before the trip. Making sure you don't cheat on him, while he's gone, because you're exclusive now...
But wtf is this? You guys have been on 5 days and you decide to be exclusive? Why?
Also him saying I see you when I see you doesn't sound like hes that interested in you.
If he was really into you, you'd see him before he goes away and he would also mention that he wasn't to talk to you while he's away (once a day would be a good start, but more would show he's actually interested)
It's all a case of if he wanted to he would...
I'd dump his ass and block and delete.
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I think it’s a test. He’s looking to see if you’re thinking about him while you’re on vacation and he’s trying to make you insecure so he can see if you can be talked into trusting him again after he starts acting weird.
Girl, I would have went soooo silent after that first commitment considering the way he acts. What you're telling is a red flag. Immediate let down after a verbal commitment = shit test, hot and cold or committed because he figured that is the only way to have access to your body. As all the ladies said, regardless of the actual reason, next.
He might try to throw some manipulation if and when you tell him that you are not interested anymore. But good he showed disinterest first :D All the best.
Look, I wouldn’t get exclusive after 5 days. BUT if I did, my knee jerk response to such a milquetoast response from him would be, “oh, well that doesn’t sound very exclusive then, best we just be casual after all!” Then I block and delete. Such an immediate low-energy response to your newfound exclusivity is everything you need to know about his efforts going forward.