This claim infuriates me, since almost my whole life I've been rejected even by the ugliest scrotes until only recently (have a boyfriend now so huzzah I guess). In middle and highschool I really wanted a bf and approached a ton of sometimes even plain unattractive men out of desperation (or boys should I say), and NO ONE reciprocated. I was just annoying them even though I tried every trick in the book on how to make conversation and get to know someone. They all just responded with short words like "nice" or "yeah". One even fucking straight up ran away after I approached him to chat a second time. I believed the manosphere's lie that there's a ton of "average" men that are just begging to have a girlfriend and I thought I could easily get a boyfriend by basically demolishing my standards and approaching ugly scrotes. This didn't get me a boyfriend, but it did made me have a reputation as a creep in the school and I ended up super bitter. I spent my entire teen years and childhood completely friendless and with no one to love me. So when dumb incels claim that "hurr durr women can't be lonely and they can get anyone they want" I want to bash their brains out. And yes, as you can see I'm still bitter about what happened.
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Because to men "get" means "have sex". And to women "get" means "find someone who respects me and treats me well". One is much easier than the other.
Well, if you lower your standards enough and have no regards for your own safety or enjoyment you can probably can get a lot of men to have sex with you (aka use you as a living fleshlight) because they won't say no to free sex.
It speaks for itself that men would consider this a great and enviable situation.
Because most men are inherently rape-y and want what they "can't have". They don't want to be pursued, they want a challenge. They want "the chase". This is literally something I've heard from a man's mouth myself.
So it's "women can get whoever they want" with an asterisk and terms and conditions, and it's for the men already interested in you that YOU get to choose from.
Also it's *women*, not high school girlies who don't understand the game yet. If you're still young pls be careful throwing yourself at men. Surefire way to get yourself traumatized. Avoid. If I could do my life over, I'd have never spoken to a single boy in HS.
Part of patriarchy is putting out concepts like these so that women, especially younger women, do think they're supposed to throw themselves at men, and that way even if the women they're pursuing don't want them, it's still in their mind that they can find someone for if / when they get desperate enough. Aka access to women no matter what.
Big point you made though, you said you had no one growing up to give you love, and I'm so sorry this was your experience. You were supposed to have that love and acceptance at home. Girls who don't grow up with that protection tend to search for the feeling of it elsewhere, in other people. Prioritize finding a therapist as soon as you can to work on the pain. And find an older woman, I swear by that! You want wisdom from a woman, who's lived long enough as a woman, to give another woman guidance. Just my two cents.
When I reject men that ask me out I usually try to be as polite as possible about it (exceptions would be I'm being stalked or have reasonable suspicion of danger) because I'm aware of how difficult it is to gain the courage to approach someone you like.
The few times I persued men ended up horribly every time. Men seem to get off on publically humiliating a woman that likes him. They'll yell "ew" so everyone around her can hear and the men will gossip and spread rumors about the women a braggy neggy way.
Some boys I went to school with angrily yelled at me for it. The belief that men want women to approach them is a total lie. Men only like it because it boosts their egos and opens up an opportunity for a potential easy lay. It has nothing to do with romance.
Men really enjoy making women cry and kicking women when they're already down. Its so disgusting and pathetic.
It's funny because scrotes are doing exactly what they accuse women of. It's all projection.
It's not true. you can have F boys or boyfriends who want husband priviliges but a partner for life is extremely hard. Like that Jamie fox idiot, after his recovery he is trying to get together with katie Holmes while she didn't even know he got sick, that's how far she removed herself from him.
Actually most men would... I don't know what was wrong with you. Maybe it was your gender 🧐