I don't feel bad for men who are addicted to porn

They blame their porn addiction and loneliness on women so I definately don't feel bad for them and I never wil. Do they feel bad for the woman they degrade and disrespect because they don't meet their beauty standards? nope.

I actually don't believe this addiction crap. Do I think addiction is a real problem? Yes. But I think "porn addiction" is yet another way for men to avoid taking responsibility for their shitty behavior.

Has anyone noticed that porn addiction seems to apply exclusively to men, whereas real addictions, i.e., drugs and alcohol, are seen in equal numbers among both sexes? There are plenty of cam or window girls, yet surprisingly, they don't suffer from "porn addiction." Now, both sexes like to look at erotic art; to say they don't is complete misogynistic bullshit. However, I haven't met one woman who acts like a pig and jacks off to men or other women getting raped on camera. Most are absolutely repulsed by it. Porn has one major theme: the man gets to come, the woman just moans her way through it without orgasming. Ergo, men care very, very little about female sexuality. In fact, I'm convinced that they hate it when women enjoy sex. (Probably because, on some level, they know they suck in bed, and it reminds them what they can't do. I haven't met one guy who was any good. Women? Hells yes!)

The very fact that men knowingly get off on women being degraded speaks volumes.

I have had these angry thoughts too.

I get especially bitter when I hear discussions on how Onlyfans exploits men financially and makes business from their loneliness and everyone agrees on how the poor men are being misled with wrong promises and scammed out of their money. Doesn’t this narrative source back to what was somewhere the ‘femme fatale’-trope, evil enchantresses taking out the poor humble man? Sirens? Witches?? Why do we project that onto girls who were groomed? Who gives a second thought about the women being promised a career and fame for humiliating themselves and violating their most intimate for men to abuse, humiliate and degrade? Why does this discussion not include women’s trauma?

When a man watches porn, it’s not only his dick and self worth that suffer, it’s the women in real life who come in contact with him who are exposed to violence inspired by porn, and it’s the women in the porn industry who are being trafficked, raped and traumatised.

If a man wants to sit at home and death grip himself until he becomes a sociopathic zombie who doesn’t feel adequate enough to leave his house, I’d say we let him. Isn’t that a choice, too?

Addictions are tragic and I know that we have to protect children and teenagers from pornography and yet a part of me still reproaches men. Women are the ones being exploited. I don’t have the choice to look at porn and find excitement in it because the images scare me. I remember my first look at porn out of curiosity in my teenage years. I immediately got a very weird feeling in my stomach, disgust and guilt and I got fear from it. I felt that maybe this was a world for someone else that I couldn’t have access to and in a way this childish understanding was a wisdom that I had to recognise intellectually much later. It’s as if I finally saw what exactly I had always been feeling as a girl but was unable to find a source for. The dooming sense that my body was a commodity and something to be used to degrade for a type of pleasure I wouldn’t understand. Women are less likely to be addicted to porn because it is made for men. I can’t possibly enjoy something that makes me feel disgusting as a person and I blame men for looking at these images, finding nothing wrong with them and making a habit of it. Boohoo erectile dysfunction, it was his own choice, even if he was a teenager.

At the moment it feels that I’m still waking up from the indoctrination that all of this is normal and I’m in the phase of anger.

I’m sick of having terrible sex with emotionless death gripped robots who wouldn’t particularly feel the difference if it was me in their bed or a somewhat warm cossette with a hole in it and who needs an entire circus of stunts and artistry to bring back his numb piece from retirement. And then being declared a prude (by men and !!women) for not finding joy in being complicit in whatever kink of weird name overrides his numbness with particular effectiveness.

When I was younger I thought that maybe I’m just not open and experienced enough but the older I get the more I find the confidence to conclude that men are just bad in bed.

I would say the vast majority of them yes, however I was addicted to porn for a few years after being exposed to it on tumblr when I was 15. I knew there had to be something horrible about it and so I tried to stop many times, successfully around age 19 when I started dating my ex, who shared how I felt about porn. As a child you can’t consent to being shown explicit sexual material, and it definitely does something to your brain when exposed that young. I do feel bad in that way because I faced the same thing, but men who purely blame the women in the films for their addictions piss me off and who refuse to recognize the harms that porn also does to women in forms of sex trafficking and their partners who have addictions. Men who are in denial idgaf about either. I always knew it was fucked up.

I don't either.

When I was about 7 I happened upon a vhs tape in my moms room while she was at work, that I didn't know was a porn. I remember being so disgusted by what I saw, and perhaps was traumatized by it but I can imagine that a lot of 7 year old boys would be "awakened" in a different way by it. Because of the way we are taught that women are servants to men. I think the way they view it starts with a lens of privilege and the way we do starts from a different place. For me it was a very depressing look into how men see us.

The men get to eat and sit on their ass -while the woman has cooked the food and cleans up after-is the way my family has always rolled, though. I really do think that is the main the reason I was so disgusted by it and why a boy would have probably enjoyed it. It was a metaphor for me, of what is expected of women versus men.

It really did look like the woman was doing all the dirty and hard work while the man was just enjoying seeing her do it and getting all the pleasure, like so many other things I had observed so far in my life.

I could write a book on this. I agree with you wholeheartedly.

What frustrates me so much is the fact that it is referred to as porn “addiction” at all. It is compulsion. It is compulsive behaviour and can absolutely be challenged and unlearned through behavioural change intervention (provided the participant is eager and committed to change; you can lead a horse to water and all that).

It is not a chemical dependency. It's not really an addiction, it's the oversimplification of language. I have much more sympathy for drug and alcohol addicts because there is a heavy physiological component to sobering up from a mind altering substance. Their bodies go through actual agony in the process of being deprived of a chemical they have grown physically dependent on.

Yes, young boys are groomed into consuming porn which has a catastrophic impact on their psychosocial development. However, I am MUCH more concerned about the women and girls trafficked, groomed, exploited, abused, and dehumanised in the creation of pornographic material.

Yeah addictions themsleves are unfortunate. But I never blamed anybody but myself about my alcoholism. I was the one who had to choose to handle it. I feel terrible about everyone it affected negatively and if any of them ever wanted to not spend time with me or date me because of it, I'd never hold it against them. Even if I was ever dating again now that I'm sober, I wouldn't get salty at someone for not wanting to date someone with that risk factor.

Getting addicted to porn because you saw it when you were in elementary/middle school and it is a legitimately addicting thing doesn't make someone a bad person.

Realizing it's fucking up your life and taking no accountability, taking no actions to fix it, blaming everyone else, and ignoring the harm it causes people you care about is what says something about your character.

They have so many resources too, like just go old fashioned and turn your wifi off or something, get a wifi number so you can only be online outside.

Very conveniently they never actually do anything or get help they just bring it up during dates like it's an uncontrollable disease.

I'm gonna go a step further and seem like a proper callous bitch and call out the "but I was exposed to it as a kid" excuse too. When I was a kid, I came across porn and instantly felt disturbed and inherently knew that it was something I, as a kid(though noone should regardless of age imo), shouldnt be watching. I felt guilty and ashamed and didnt go looking again. Thus, i've never been into porn. Nowadays for many more reasons. But then, I am a woman. When kids come across or seek out porn, they KNOW they shouldnt be looking at it. As a kid, the guilt and feeling of being disturbed made sure I never went looking again. But again, I was a girl. Boys are more disagreeable in nature anyway and on top of that, most likely feel something else that overrides any guilt.

Yeah, I feel bad for women and girls. Porn makes the world a more hostile place and worsen VAWG.

There's news about boys making AI generated naked pics of their female classmates in Spain and the victim is not one or two either. I feel very sorry for the girls.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-66877718

I understand that the boys were victims because they were exposed to porn, but I feel absolutely ZERO sympathy for them. Girls who are exposed to porn don't go making naked pics of their male peers. There's something wrong with the males.

I don't feel bad for them because they're willing to step on exploited women and girls to satisfy their depraved desires whereas other addictions like drugs, alcohol are primarily harming themselves.

Even if the addiction becomes less debilitating, the rot on their brains is irreversible and the women in their lives will be punished for it.

I agree! The only worthwhile men to date, marry, and have children children with DON'T support the sex trade, including porn, strippers, child marriage, etc. and fewer and fewer men meet this criteria. It's more critical now than EVER to teach young men how to be good humans because once they're adults it's too late. Men don't change. Like, as a woman who only dates men who don't support the sex trade the difference of these men vs the avg pro-sex trade man is STARK and it's SO easy to tell when a man doesn't see women as people. MOST men don't see women as people. I actually really like the idea of sending pro-sex trade men to war against each other like China and India are, let em duke it out with modernized ancient weapons of war. 🤣