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If you go into my history, you'll see that I post a lot about my friends. Long story short, I had a fallout with this group and I'm no longer I'm contact with this group, because there's too much juvenile drama. They have contacted me and tried to make peace, but I'm not interested. Today, I thought I found a potential new group, but I can already tell it's going to be the same. From two hours, here's what I saw:
This girl was having relationship troubles with her bf (who was currently present at the time) and she's seeking advice from another guy "friend". I can already tell what's going on and that this so-called "friend" is really into her and listening to her carefully and giving her advice about how she's just jealous and not validating her feelings. 😭
The guys in this group are like monkeys. From how they express themselves it's just over the top for someone in their late 20's.
They remind me of my friends from high school.
Given how hard it is for me to find friends after my previous fallout. I foresee that I will not develop any close and meaningful relationships with this group, but I'll just chill with them, because we share the same interests at a club. I'm trying to make peace with this decision because I know that this is a practical decision and I don't want to be dragged into any foreseeable drama.
I think I'm just going to complain at how hard it is to make new friends. All my close friends have settled down, and I see them less frequently. I just want to chill with people and have an adult conversation and some food.
There’s no such thing as a friendship group for me anymore… I’ve cherry-picked the few HV friends I’ve found along the way and left the rest of the groups behind. Everytime I've been part of a "clique" (not an organised team, class, or club) something LV and messy happens! I don't try to join these cliques anymore, I just let individual people come to me. I feel lucky to have a few HV friends in the meantime but like you said it's hard to meet new friends that meet the standard.
It’s good that you’ve accepted that this group is not for you (rather than falling into the allure of drama/gossip or the desire to fix them). Treat it as a blessing so you can direct that time/energy into finding better people. In the meantime, take yourself out on food dates and journal as a way to have an adult conversation with yourself. Maybe join a sport/club/organisation or even enrol in a course to meet new people (while also upskilling!). Hopefully this manifests and attracts like-minded people towards you!
Why do your group of friends have men in it? Find ones with females only or make your own. If you have guys in your group, you will always have drama.