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Kids- Why in the everloving fuck does ANYONE wants kids? Unless you are 10%(?) of the population with thriving finances and a big, loving, intelligent, highly evolved family? Even with all that, you are putting blinders on because there is no hope for the planet environmentally. We are way past the limit and nobody with the power to stop the destruction gives a single fuck to do so. Homo sapiens may survive to the other side of this implosion, but the deluge of natural disasters and incurable diseases coming our way before earth restabilizes is assured. Speaking of which, isn't it funny how scrotes whine about going extinct if women don't reproduce their crusty genes, but never whine about how the microplastics and forever chemicals are ravaging fertility and giving babies cancer?
Have any of you ever asked your parent why they had you? I did and it was pretty eye opening.
I remember when I used to want kids, and the reasons? Sure I wanted to care for them, teach them to be a good person and have love for this planet but honestly:
A) Love that wouldn't leave me
B) To be tied forever to the scrote I was currently giving my all to in a desperate attempt to find the love/security I never got from my family in the first place.
C) Be able to make and claim a very beautiful little child and idk, look at them or something? 🥴 I thought being a top tier beauty would be the ticket to a great life, true love, and all that good stuff. But looking back I realize it's a great way to get used for clout and never seen for who you truly are, even women will be weird around you and swear you're flirting with their pet toad.
Yes I know I was an idiot but at least I can recognize that now.
As for anyone else who wants kids, WHY???
I live upstairs from a couple that just had a baby. It's been months and when I tell you this creature cries like it's gonna die every 2-4 hours I'm not kidding. Sometimes it cries and stops and starts back up 15 minutes later, no doubt after the mom has attended to it and finally found a comfortable position to rest in lol. Doesn't matter if it's 3 am. It's very annoying and I don't even have to so much as look at this baby.
Another neighbor who I actually think is really cool besides her hopeless pickme ways, has a 4 year old daughter that loves to randomly let out blood curdling screams at the top of her lungs. She has 2 teenagers on top of this... She said once "have kids they said, it'll be fun..." as well as "well she's cute when she's sleeping I guess" lol. And yes she is a great mom, I literally watch her teaching her kids life skills and setting healthy boundaries and trying to do her best for them. But she is damn tired and nearly over it.
Then theres the worst of all, a neighbor who is the sweetest woman, keeps a beautiful spotless home, and ended up with an absolute terror of a son. He is only 8 years old but I am 100% sure he will end up a criminal or a druggie. He literally just goes around the property breaking stuff, smashing things and of course, screaming for absolutely no reason. Stomping up and down the stairs and jackhammering the doorbells. Apparently he has ADHD and tourettes, what a combo! He's been smashing peoples car windows and sometimes I see him alone on the streets doing crazy stuff. I have overheard him say "Mom, should I kill you or what?". There is absolutely nothing about his mother besides being too nice that would cause this, and I can imagine how exhausting it must be to constantly be tough in order to manage him, if that's even possible. Oh and she also once left me her keys to feed her cat for a week because her abusive ex had been after her. The boy has demon genes no doubt.
So maybe this is a genuine question but definitely a reminder that you'd probably be just as happy without kids- if not more happy... even if you never find that unicorn to contribute DNA & raise them with.
Usually women want kids because they've been groomed by their families to do so. Or because they feel empty inside for a multitude of reasons, and rather than addressing that feeling they have a child to distract them from it.
Men want kids because they want to have someone to control (both the kids and the mother). Thats literally the only reason for 99% of men.
I don't want to risk having a son, they'll either mistreat you or a woman in the future.
I don’t think I want to have children, this world isn’t worth it. If I have a girl, she’ll probally be a victim of misogny and male depravity. If I have a boy he’ll probally be a raging incel. I know people will say “that’s extreme, it’s about how you raise the kids” like nothing can stop your children from changing.
But I’m hoping I can adopt a girl in the future.. I just don’t think it’s worth having my own, knowing there’s so much children who actually need proper homes.
I don't think having kids or not needs to be a point of contention amongst us. It's safe to say this world is never going to get 100% of people deciding to have children, nor 100% of people deciding to be childfree. Humanity is definitely not prepared for things to swing completely one way or the other. Having a balance of the two is exactly what we need.
We should be glad there are people voluntarily going childfree. It sure beats a scenario where women are not allowed to have wanted children, because it got to a point that population numbers have to be restricted by force. A lower population would give the next generations a fighting chance to thrive. I really hope they get to thrive.
Voluntary birth control could very well be the thing that helps humanity avert disaster in our time. Back in the 20th century, humanity almost faced mass starvation - modern agriculture hit the pause button on that disaster. But even the guy credited with that (Norman Borlaug) left us with a warning that it was nothing more than a temporary fix to buy us a little more time.
It's mostly ridiculously rich men who think the "lesson" from the story of modern agriculture is that "we can invent our way out" which is why they keep building rockets. It's magical thinking. It's hubris. Meanwhile, plenty of women are already doing something that can help save the world by limiting the number of children they have or having none at all.
Hahaha thanks for the chuckle.
Monster children are nightmares, for sure... But children are usually pretty simple and with a bit of emotional intelligence & attunement, and healthy attachment, most* perceived misbehaviour can be sorted out.
I agree with a lot of what you shared.
My thoughts.observations over the years:
people have/want kids for all sorts of reasons. Many do it without thinking it through. but even if they know it won't be easy, they still do it b/c it's worth it for them (or they thought it would be).
some do it because it's what is expected/pushed onto them by family.
some do it out of a sense of obligation
some for 'religious' purposes
some do it in order to have a child to control/possess/dominate over/ or for other narcissistic reasons.
some do it because they want to be a parent (regardless of whether they'd make a good one, or not).
many do it because of the biological urge. we are human after all. On a biological level its literally in the design. It's your mind that tells you otherwise. most people don't think about this/second guess it unless they have either been traumatised (eg bad parenting/ childhood experiences), or for some less-than-common reason are operating from a more conscious headspace than the majority.
some do it accidentally/unplanned. you know, the sex thing. minus an abortion.
some do it to contribute to society, in their minds.
some do it to pass on the family legacy/business. (strategic)
some do it because despite how f*ed up the world is, they choose hope, faith, optimism, and to be a part of the change.
Some do it simply because they want to.
Some do it because they genuinely love kids. Even though they can be screaming monsters sometimes. 😆
Some do it because they operate out of love.
some do it because they want to have a family.
Not everyone has the same world view.
not everyone has the same world view as you.
It's a basic, primal, mostly universal desire, so you'll probably continue to be baffled haha.
I'm sorry your sleep is suffering when YOU have chosen not to have kids. That's a cruel twist of fate, indeed....
Your post made me laugh and reminded me of when i stayed with a freind who had a few kids. they really were quite monstrous (an dI rarely say that about kids!).
At that point in my life kids normally got really calm and chill aorund me, but even my presence couldn't chill them the f out. it was sad though, their parents were going through a gnarly separation so that can for sure f up a kid...
I used to have the same world view as you, but for me at least, i realised i had just been traumatised by my own upbrining and once I healed that stuff I got in touch with my true desires (which were wanting kids). If I manage it (bio clock wise), I'll probably get a donor, unfortunately. Not the way I would have wanted things to be, but no way in hell am I ending up attached to a scrote for 18+ years..., plus if i'm going to have kids with a man he has to be a HVM a the minimum. no way my kids are going to experience anything other than high quality parenting, if i can help it.
Childhood may not be 'perfect' but I'm sure as hell going to do everything in my power to prevent my kids having a scrote for a 'dad'.
im child free. my dad is and will always be my first experience of what a LVM scrote is. And then i have my pickme mom who, you know what im not nostradamus enough to determine if she was always a pickme or circumstances lead her to settling with my dad. i dont know. what i do know is im never pushing out some losers kid,
I’m childfree and I can’t imagine why anyone would want children. There’s no future in which those children will be thriving, unless you have enough wealth to escape the upcoming relentless climate disasters (so, probably that upper 10% of the wealthy class).
Not to mention, there’s absolutely nothing about pregnancy, childbirth, or parenting that is appealing to me. Even if the world were better than it is, and there were a future to hope for for our kids… I would still never want to be a parent. I have no desire to raise and teach children, and far less to do all the unsavory parts of parenting that women almost always get saddled with the most - changing diapers, holding the damn baby while it cries all night long, picking up after and cleaning up after it constantly, keeping it out of trouble, disciplining it when it when the trouble can’t be stopped first. Rearranging my schedule to accommodate theirs, driving them around all the time, etc etc plus the sheer COST of pregnancy and childbirth, as well as the cost of keeping them alive, paying for daycare or a nanny, and beyond.
Everything about parenting would be, at best, a disappointment for me. Most of it would make me livid at my own life choices.
I have many, many more reasons to not want children, but people are always so surprised that I don’t want them, like it’s a given that every woman wants kids and ever woman over 30 already has them. But the whole experience would be a nightmare for me.
Even my own mom, who was afforded the luxury of being a SAHM (my dad worked full time and we lived in a different city from my grandparents, so she didn’t have a lot of support), seemed to hate parenting a lot of the time. She claims that she loved having babies, but all I remember is how miserable she seemed most of the time. Maybe she did love having babies - but they’re only babies for a short time, and you’re stuck with the consequences of your actions for decades afterwards.
I don't like humans below 12 really. Especially Gen A
I am on the fence about having kids because I haven't found any sort of male specimen worth procreating with and I don't want to be a single mother (although I agree that is best when the father is a deadbeat).
There are some things that really scare me about having kids such as the fact that I see soooo many women lose themselves in motherhood. I have also seen some really great moms who maintain their status as a human being in the world outside of being "just" a mother.
Also, what if you raise a Dahmer? Or something sinister like that? I believe women only have so much control with the hand they are dealt in children. I also think women tend to get the blame when the kid is just bound to be a weirdo (such as the Columbine shooters' moms).
Believe it or not, many women's sole purpose for having kids is to use the children for a tax break or for other social monetary benefits. They don't actually care about raising them.
Another aspect to think about is when you have a sick kid... such as extremely heavy on autism spectrum or something else like severe autoimmune diseases. One of my family members is chained to her son basically for life since he is so far on the autism spectrum. I just had a severely sick dog for a year (around the clock medication, tons of vet and specialist visits) and to say it was taxing would be the understatement of the century (he's on the upswing now but geeze that was utter hell). I can't imagine going through similar processes with a child for who knows how many years.
And just to add to the biological debate, I did feel the urge around 28 start having kids and it was very strong. It was bad timing because I was going through a massive breakup and I remember thinking, "Really? Why now?" I do sometimes wonder if I would have been happier at this point in my life if I had actually followed through on those urges.
You’ve literally described the awful children of pickme women and their scrote men and think “yeah, these are all who should reproduce.” Lmao! The only couple who really gets a pass is the newborn cuz babies aren’t exactly known for being good communicators.
I want kids cuz a HVM and I will raise kids in a happy, healthy home creating more HV children who will grow up and make the world a better place. If HV people don’t procreate then who is instilling good character and values into the next generation? Who’s creating our next leaders? Our next innovators? Our next feminists? Like??? The easiest way to make the world a better place is to create better people. You think leaving the scrote and pickme kids to terrorize the world is for the better? You think letting scrote and pickmes dictate the character and values of the next generation is actually better for the greater good? I definitely don’t.
People say it's biological, but I refuse to believe that. If people didn't know it was even possible to make babies, they wouldn't think about having them. They might think about having sex, but not about babies. It's not like the biological need to pee or sleep. We are programmed to procreate.
It only works when there's abundance. Men usually think of having a child as getting a pet so without money they offer nothing. I think women are told to compromise and they end up being nannies not mothers.
Update: I now hear the downstairs neighbor with the baby crying and arguing with her man frequently.
For context I'm in a proudly feminist country with excellent free healthcare and insanely long maternity and paternity leave. It's the general social expectation that men should do equal housework although statistically they fall short in practice. I don't even hear him arguing back with her, maybe throwing in a "yep"here and there, but whatever her feelings are I am sure they are valid.
This is as good as it gets unless you're rich.
I feel like we have lost the plot on FDS. This is not a black pilled space. I want kids because that’s what any species naturally desires. It’s biology. If you have a doomer mentality I do feel for you because that is very depressing. My kids will be a light in my life and the world. I believe there is hope for a better planet, and I want my kids to continue that hope. If you’ve given up on a family, why even waste time finding a man…which is the point of this space after all. At that point, just date another woman. It’s easier to be lesbian if you don’t care about creating a biological family.