I made my own mini handbook. A post with quotes.

Here are some quotes I saved from the FDS forum, the FDS subreddit, and other women subreddits that I feel align with FDS.

I wish I would’ve saved more when I was going through the FDS subreddit when I found out about FDS.

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Something I have had to learn the hard way is that men will never put up with the same shit they put us through. I have stayed with men who consistently disrespected me so long as they “apologized,” only for them to cut me off entirely because of a minor issue on my part. They don’t show us forgiveness, because we aren’t important to them. They don’t value connections with us; they value themselves and their own pleasure. We continue to fall for the idea that forgiveness builds relationships when men are simply not acting from the same place, and this is what allows them to continue to exploit us.

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Don’t have penetrative sex with a man unless he can bring you to orgasm with his hands and/or mouth first.

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Life is too short to waste one single second with someone who doesn’t appreciate and value you.

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Women go their whole lives trying to get love from men, and because men are not biologically capable of love in the same way women are, they never succeed at it. Women measure their value against their ability to get a man to love them, and they think that there is something lacking in them that makes them unlovable. This damages their self esteem. But the male brain is constructed very differently from the female brain. Women love deeply and unselfishly by design, because we birth and care for children. Men do not, so they are selfish and consumers by nature. There's so many women walking around questioning themselves, 'Why am I so unlovable? Why can't I find a man who will love me? What's wrong with me?' It never occurs to them to project it outward, there's nothing lacking with you, It's something lacking with him. Men aren't mentally or biologically capable of love the way women are.

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Why don't these men ever ask themselves, if they would want to marry themselves if they were a woman? It's a simple exercise to learn for themselves why they are getting the results they are getting. For all they expect a woman to be for them, are they even worth it?

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Sex is not a performance but an exchange of energy.

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We live in a society in which men are socialized to be selfish and inconsiderate and women are socialized to accept being mistreated, used and neglected.

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PIV sex must be earned.

He has to prove that he's worthy of accessing my sacred portal, and he does that by prioritizing my pleasure and by making me cum with his mouth and fingers first before a PIV.

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Men who believe love requires sacrifices. Well it doesn't because love means being in absence of negativity and control, expecting your partner to make sacrifices is both negativity and control.

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Don't romanticize men.

Think about the kind of porn they want (nasty deep throat, no female orgasm, slurs). Think of how many women they've probably called a "bitch" for no real reason.

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Do not center men. Don't change yourself in order to accommodate their shit behavior. Flip the script. They are the ones who should be changing to accommodate you.

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Stop bargaining yourself as a benefits package for a man.

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To me the man puts in an effort if he

• Gets to know me well enough at least to think of a thoughtful date idea I would like.

• Gets dressed up for the date and arrives a bit earlier.

• The place is a reasonable distance from where I live.

• Asks thoughtful questions about me, but also reasonably opens up about himself. (No emotionally unavailable people.)

• Pays for dinner and doesn't make a fuss about doing so, like I now owe him, or he did a big favor for me.

• Checks in on me after the date, did you get home safe, etc.

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Making a woman orgasm should be a matter of ego. A man should be ashamed if he can't bring a woman to orgasm. He should be devastated. That's bare minimum. It's shameful for a man to be bad in bed and expect any women to love him. Men should take pride in doing good things that benefit women, like making us orgasm.

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Either they like you or they don’t. Never try to convince somebody of your worth. If a person doesn’t appreciate you, they don’t deserve you. Respect yourself and be with people who truly value ‘you.’

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Make yourself a priority. At the end of the day, you’re your longest commitment.

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Your value doesn’t decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth.

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Straight men being polyamorous or into bdsm is probably the least radical thing in the world, and I'm inherently suspicious of them all! For most of history men were encouraged & sanctioned to both have more than one partner & to use violence against women.

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Men need sex. So he's getting it from somewhere whether it's a girlfriend, wife, FWB, or prostitute. I used to think men had single times like I always do, but it's simply not true. They always have another woman lined up when they break up with one woman. Then flirting with you whilst being involved shows you how they're always on the lookout for the next vagina. They'll keep you as a friend, and when their girl leaves or dies, it's your turn. Men say this a lot about women that, "She's not yours, it's just your turn." But that's male's projecting their own actions onto women. Most women are very sad and broken up after a break up, and it takes time to move on. Most men are in someone else's bed prior to the breakup even.

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How did the most delicate part of the male body become the most widely used metaphor for strength of character whilst the part of a woman's body which can grow life and bring it into the world is synonymous with weakness?

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Here's one feminist life rule of mine: I never judge a man based on how he treats women when they are coddling or praising him. Look closely at how a man reacts when a woman displeases him, stands up to him, or draws a boundary with him, and you will find out who he really is.

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Men seem to feel that the more they destroy and kill, the more powerful they are, mistaking destruction for power instead of weakness. They don't seem to be able to see that creation is the only power and destruction is a failure and parasite-like behavior.

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No woman is required to “respect” cultural practices which are inherently degrading to them or religious beliefs which devalue them as human beings.

We are not require to adhere to a state of patriarchal reverence, whether we're observing our own society or others, and we're free to both criticize and reject any ideology that views female human beings as innately inferior or born for subservience.

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To say that straight men are heterosexual is only to say that they engage in sex (fucking exclusively with the other sex, i.e., women). All or almost all of that which pertains to love, most straight men reserve exclusively for other men. The people whom the admire, respect, adore, revere, honor, whom the imitate, idolize, and form profound attachments to, whom they are willing to teach and from whom they are willing to learn, and whose respect, admiration, recognition, honor, reverence and love they desire… those are, overwhelmingly, other men. In their relations with women, what passes for respect is kindness, generosity or paternalism; what passes for honor is removal to the pedestal. From women they want devotion, service and sex.

Heterosexual male culture is homoerotic; it is man-loving.

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If you catch yourself BEGGING someone for…. human decency? a response? time together? clarity? respect? some compassion? some kindness? You need to take a step back and realize that you're begging someone for the bare minimum. That's ridiculous and beneath you.

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Always ask yourself: is this person worth disrupting my vaginal pH for?

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Men that say they wouldn't spend a lot of money on a "complete stranger" for a first date, are the same men that don't mind asking to exchange bodily fluids with a "complete stranger" on a first date! Make it make sense!

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The women who defend trans women have been so supremely brainwashed by patriarchy and liberal feminist ideology. They truly believe they are being compassionate, but what they don't understand is that they are being compassionate to a group of people who are in competition with us and want nothing more than to dominate us. Domination is a male characteristic, which goes to show they are not, nor could they ever be, real women. It's just another way males are trying to conquer women.

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We are trained to be empathetic with everyone, even our own predators.

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Preserve and protect yourself and your energy at all costs.

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That’s why boys will tolerate other boys outrightly bullying them but if he asked out a girl in front of her friends and she rejected him which made her friends laugh, he’d remember that forever and hold it against all women forever. Men respect/fear/put up with men but they don’t respect/fear/put up with us. Men view themselves as more important and women as second-class citizens. 

It’s why men are so fixated on what other men think of them. As some ladies have said, a lot of men are pickmes too - they’re pickmes for other men. Men will date women because they feel other men will be impressed that they could get such women. Men will make fun of women so that they look big and tough to other men.

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A “hoe phase” shouldn’t be normalized and i had that pushed on me by pickme classmates in college. She is trying to drag you down to her level.

Higher risk of stds and abuse. Taking a man home you dont know and just think about it- you’re getting naked and often hes atop you where he pretty much overpowers you. Higher risk of him being violent and abusive especially when you’re at your most vulnerable.

Yeast infections, throwing off the ph, etc no thanks.

Hookups are awkward. You don’t even know the guy. How can you even relax and really get into it? At least for me, i can’t actually get wet or orgasm at all when i’m nervous and still feel shy. Tip toeing past his roomates or parents or getting looks from his apartment neighbors when you walk to your car afterwards…. All awkward.

There is nothing to actually gain positively out of hooking up as a woman. Our bodies are hardwired to bond and “catch feels” after sex. All my friends that would hookup would be tripping or crying about how he wouldn’t ever call her back.

It holds up the global resistance. By allowing men to keep using women for low effort sex, it just reinforces to them that they can keep being low effort and keeps them in this objectifying women mindset. If we all stuck together and made them invest into us and make effort then they’d have to step it up or be abstinent.

What is a hookup gonna actually do for you that your own hands/a good sex toy alone won’t do for you? I haven’t met a pickme that actually had an orgasm from a one night stand unless she gave it to herself.

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Don’t be afraid to lose people. Be afraid of losing yourself by trying to please everyone around you.

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Stop searching for your other half. You are not a half.

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You don’t need a relationship to be complete. You are complete because of who you are, not who you are with.

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Most importantly, to a man, ANY WOMAN is better than NO WOMAN. Women bring immeasurable value to a man's life through our physical, emotional, intellectual, and sexual labor. Yes, it is all labor.

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You can flirt with my man. If he flirts back, he's yours.