Love Is Blind 3 - PT 2: Should You Tell Your Partner You Find Someone Else Attractive? (FDS PODCAST EPISODE 89)

Real quick, I want to remind everyone that the idiom "love is blind" is being misused on the show. People seem to think "love is blind" refers to loving a person no matter what they look like, or something. What it actually means is that love blinds you to seeing a person's faults. For example, everyone else can see that he's just lazy, but because you love him you make excuses for his laziness as if it's not a character flaw.

Easy peasy: no. I would never tell my partner that I find another guy attractive. I expect the same courtesy from him too. If he asks me “do you find X attractive” I won’t lie, I’ll say “yes that’s a good looking guy”. But I won’t volunteer that information, and saying “yeah x is a good looking guy” when asked is different from me volunteering that information spontaneously. Unless there is some weird and exceptional situation that pops up, I can’t anticipate doing otherwise.

Love you guys but you've gotta stop doing episodes on this garbage tv show; you're killing me! I look forward to the podcast every week but then major disappointment when I see this is the topic. 😕

No, because its inconsequential to the relationship. Abusers love abusing honesty. My bf and I can find other people attractive but it should not matter to my relationship at all. So, if my bf comes to me and start telling me about how he find others girls more attractive then I would assume he regrets his relationship with me, not committed to me or simply DGAF about how these things can impact the relationship. I will never tolerate such disrespect.

I really appreciated the commentary on Zanab’s self deprecating behavior. It caused me to reflect on some things I’ve said recently about myself and my body. I knew that the things I said were not good but it’s like my subconscious mind took over and just had me blurt out things that my conscious mind would stop me from saying. I don’t know if I specifically was fishing for compliments as much as I wanted somebody to commiserate with. When Reux discusses how Zanab’s behavior comes off as, I can kind of see how I might have been coming off and how unattractive it is/how it pushes people away.

Thankfully, I know what caused me to start spiraling so I’m going to come up with a game plan to boost my body image and take care of myself mentally for next time.

Agreed with all of Savannah's comments !

Fantastic episode!

Reaux in particular was hitting it out of the park on the major topics

It’s a death blow to your relationship if your man comments on how attractive other women are - especially if (1) it’s a friend you see often or (2) happens regularly, quite a few women seem to catch his eye. You see it in the show - these men won’t tell you they regret dating you or whatever, they will continue using you and will drip feed hints Cole - hesitation regarding second thoughts, constantly talking about Colleen after meeting her. Bartiste- constantly talking about Raven after meeting her, eyeing her up, ignoring Nancy that night, then mentioning that Raven is a “smoke show” to his FIANCE’s face. Walk away at the first sign of disrespect. These women say on camera “oh I’m 30, I don’t want to be insecure.” Babe you are NOT insecure, you are being disrespected!