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I came across a video on Good Morning America's YouTube channel about how the use of TikTok brought a guy and a lady together.
Through TikTok videos compiled into one video, a young lady named Dani recounts her visit to Colorado to visit her sister and her husband. One night, she and her sister went to a nightclub called Cowboys where she met Zach. She mentioned that Zach came up to her, tapped her on the shoulder and told her that he saw her on the ground floor from the top floor, where he was standing with his friends and before she moved away, he decided to run up to her and tell her that she was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen.
Dani says that they chatted for a bit and she wanted to dance with him but people were line dancing and she didn't know how the dance. She said that Zach proceeded to say that he didn't mind making a fool of himself by line dancing with her but before that could happen, she had to go upstairs and they ended up losing each other/not knowning where the other went. She said that she didn't see him for the rest of the night and left the club without seeing him again. The next day, she contemplated going back to the club to see if she'd find him but decided not to and eventually flew back to LA.
She decided to go onto TikTok and made a video about meeting him. In no time, the video racked up views and eventually got up to 4 million views. She ended up finding Zach, which was the reason she made a video - to see if he’d watch it or if anyone could help her find him. She eventually got the help she was looking for from 12-year-old girls who watched her video, found Zach's Instagram and sent it to her. Dani was excited and requested to follow him. He accepted her request and she messaged him first saying that she was so happy to find him and reconnect. He said that she looked familiar but he couldn't place her face (yet this is the guy that proclaimed that she's "the most beauiful girl" he'd ever seen 🙄). You'd think that she would be instantly recognisable to him but, no, he couldn't remember her at all.
She proceeded to tell him about their meeting in the nightclub and sent him the TikTok video she made about him. He said that it getting so many views was crazy and he was flattered but even though this conversation was over text, you can tell that he felt overwhelmed and probably creeped out by the whole thing.
Dani flew back to Colorado for a second time, to visit her sister and her husband and invited Zach to go out with them for dinner. You could see, in the video, how excited she was and how he just had a "whatever" attitude (i.e. very little enthusiasm on his part). They hung out a couple of times and in the end......they've remained friends.
She said that she'd fly out to see him again and even though she talked about how they're only friends and she's happy to have made such a great friend, it's beyond obvious that she was hoping that she would have a fairytale ending with this guy. Let's be honest, ”friends“ is all they'll be because this guy has shown no excitement in being re-acquainted with her and after numerous hang-outs between them, he hasn't asked her out on a date and shown any romantic interest. In the last part of the video where she discusses their status currently, you can see how she really wants something to haappen between them while he clearly doesn't.
Watching the video made me cringe for her and just reinforces these points:
1) If a man is genuinely interested in you, he will pursue you.
2) If a man is genuinely interested in you, he will be enthusiastic about you.
3) If a man is genuinely interested in you, he will make you his girlfriend in a good, yet short amount of time. He will not be fine just being your friend, being in a situationship with you for months on end or with the fact that you are dating other guys.
4) NEVER chase a man. You will only end up with a guy that shows you no interest whatsoever. You will either get a guy who rejects you outright or a guy that will entertain your interest in him because of the boost it gives his ego and other such benefits he'll get from you.
5) Chasing a man makes you look desperate and will make him view you as less than and undesirable because no woman with self-respect, that knows her worth and knows that it's a man's role to chase a woman, will be chasing a man.
For anyone who wants to see their story in full, you can watch it here:
You're not friends chica. You put him on a pedestal and acted like the most desperate pickme on the planet. It's sad, she is so sweet and nice. He was clearly trying to get laid that night and the fact that he didn't remember her is the first sign to run.
I couldn’t watch that video after I read your description!
but that is so embarrassing. I don’t believe she actually believes they are friends but she’s saying to save her own feelings. I used to pursue 🤡
so when I read things like this I just feel sad for the woman, I feel sad for myself back then.
Yeah, the text he sends early on
"How the fuck did you find me?" (because we all know the blurred out part stands for "tf")
really shows he felt creeped out by this experience of having random 12 year old children contact him on behalf of a woman he met once at a club. (Or this woman randomly finding his private social media account that he did not give out.... I would be creeped out if a guy found me online that way....) However it went down. His response shows that he was creeped out.
And then his response to seeing her TikTok is
"Wow, that's crazy."
Which is..... not a good sign. He literally calls her crazy like wtf. (I don't even talk to people who say I'm crazy, let alone date them. Imagine dating someone who calls you crazy. That must be a hit to your self esteem. And like why??) Sure, he's cute, but.... He's not the only cute guy out there. And him being cute doesn't mean it makes sense to keep him around for longer than one night.
And to be fair this whole situation is giving me "terminally online" vibes. She describes their double date as perfect. And that they hugged and that she's glad "he is real". .........I'm sorry what?! This sounds like something you say after you've been quarantined for too long and haven't been around cute guys in your area. Meanwhile.... 'Zach' is partying it up and hitting up local clubs in his area, meeting lots of beautiful women. Maybe Dani could do that too? Go out more in her area.
The moment he saw that TikTok he just knew that he didn’t had to put in any effort. He offered her to text him and gave his number, that is when I knew that he wants to make her do the work. So quick. Within minutes and they’re probably talking for weeks now while he is lying. He is really doing his best to be kind while he doesn’t even like her, it’s so obvious in his voice. I actually find her very pretty and positive, she only needs to higher her standards and not be obsessed and putting effort, only open to be impressed by men. I had the same problem when I had a crush, I was 21 and asked him his number. He also did his best to be kind. Probably regretted knowing me. When a man finds you attractive at first seeing you and wants to know you and if he finds out you are somehow interested in him to and putting effort. He’ll think: how can this beautiful woman want me?! There must be something very very wrong with her. If he’s still talking to you that’s where the emotional abuse starts. Might be regularly ghosting, coming up with excuses, bread-crumbing you.
The moment he said he couldn’t place her is when she should have just said oh, ok, and dipped out. Anything said at a club is ego boost and nothing else. I get it though: I’ve wanted something so badly I wanted to make it so, make it come true. Doesn’t work like that in real life. Realism always for the win. Feel all the disappointment then shake it off.
It helps to recognize when a guy is flattering you.
"You are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen"
is not a genuine heartfelt compliment. It's not sincere. It is flattery used by players to pick up girls (young women). No woman ever is that beautiful (even if you are extremely conventionally attractive). "the most beautiful" is way too over-the-top to sound real. (Having some healthy self-criticism can help you see through slimy compliments such as those: there are other people more beautiful than you, smarter than you, more athletic than you, and so on and so forth....) And I get the heebie-jeebies when a guy is interested in me because of my beauty. That shows he's only into me because he wants to have "a good time" for himself, but he doesn't even see me as a human being. Just as a picture on his wall.
You don't want a guy to like you for the way you look. You will not always look this good (you will age). And it's not a compliment to be treated like an image. If a guy only likes your image, run. You want a guy who likes your personality; who takes the time to get to know you, who listens to you when you talk (actually listens), and shows an active interest in the things you like.
At least this failed, maybe finally people will stop believing in fairy tales.
Giiiiiiirl… what tha fuck
“I can’t even believe guys like this actually exist!!!!!!!1!1!1!” What some dude with a tired old “MosT BoOdAFUL GuRl in Da WorLd” line. At a fucking nightclub. Where he is trying to score no doubt. And she is over the moon with this much she hunts him down with the help of 4 million internet randos. This girl is beautiful. sis … what ya doing?
Yeowtch!
Him: Caught in a lie he tells all the girls. He just adds the "I saw you from above" detail to make it seem plausible. He says it to all of them. They all have to come in the same door, right?
Her: "For some reason this raises no red flags for me. Must pursue!"
Just goes to show...even when guys are super convincing, when they hit just the right notes... Do. NOT. Pursue.
This reminds me of missed connections on craigslist. They were very popular in my college town
That video was so cringeworthy!! She's behaving like the queen of pickmes. I have so much secondhand embarrassment right now, wow. And I was expecting the guy to be some sort of male model... he's literally just average.
I dont blame her at all because she’s young and probably very genuinely kind but I do cringe that this guy got an ego boost who uses these lines. I think women get set up for this with all these stories about men having some magical intuition where they see the one and they “just know” as soon as they lay eyes on her. So then when men say these things to women they think ’it’s happening‘, the man has seen her and he has been struck by lightening and they are meant to be. unfortunately there’s a good chunk of men, particularly at night clubs, who are predatory porn addicts. I think it takes kind women a good while to get that men can look at other human beings as nothing but a game / conquest and will say sweet things to them without actually caring about them one bit. She seems like an awesome girl I hope she meets some sincere men.
Huge mistake on her part thinking a guy in a club was someone to chase after. I'd never consider a woman I met in that setting seriously. As far as its always a bad idea for women to chase men I disagree its the men the women choose to go after.
The last 3 points in the end I had done to me by a man but it turns out he's "married" for 25 years soooo...