I just read this and holy God! It's just consenting to be abused and used. It doesn't matter how they try to spin it it's garbage. She's basically his slave, in and out of the bedroom. She should wonder why she wants to be treated like that and she should wonder why he wants to treat her like that! Choosing that does not mean you're empowered or a feminist.
“To be honest, it’s rather heartbreaking to realize that how many men view submissives as low-hanging fruit ripe for the plucking. I circulate in my local BDSM community on a regular basis and it can be tough to suss out whose motives are on the level and whose aren’t.”Uh, the reason you’d have to suss out motives is because THERE ARE MOTIVES that are deadly. If it was normal to respectfully beat and r8p women, you wouldn’t have to circulate the community to seek-suss out men who don’t see women as low-hanging fruit. It’s not easy to find because it doesn’t exist. No HVM would ever justify his desire to sexually destroy a woman because he doesn’t have that desire. Like, fine, you think you’re liberating yourself because it’s your choice, but have ya’ll never discussed why HE is turned on by r8p?
THANK YOU!👏👏👏 If you question or criticize anything about this stuff these people will typically lash out at you and make it very nasty and very personal very quickly. They will be very defensive about it as well! They don't want to look at the roots. And they'll say it has nothing to do with trauma or whatever even though the longer you talk to me you'll find out that there's something in their past that rewired their brain in this manner speaking somehow. But they'll say this is just how they are this is just how they're wired this is just what gets them off this is just their preference and to stop shaming them! And a lot of those people in non-traditional relationships will go on to pages like fds or even conscious masculinity or sacred sex pages to try to impose themselves on to those pages and to play victim that they're not being included when these pages are very clear that they view monogamy as being the healthiest relationship regarding truly good intimacy!
This is a rambling, running commentary (that's why it might not make sense.)
Wow. Just wow. Thursday I finished reading Woman Hating, by Andrea Dworkin. She says that BDSM is inherently misogynistic because it reinforces male supremacy. In fact, there's nothing revolutionary about it. I can't believe the author of this article claims to be a feminist while being a submissive. That's so much internalized misogyny that I don't even know where to start.
I'm also reading Sheila Jeffreys, who gives a lovely history of feminism. She says that BDSM started proliferating in the 80's and is a conservative reactionary movement.
Why does her husband get the final say in the home? That's not feminist at all. She is a regular bangmaid. Wow. She cooks, cleans, and does laundry. Her husband beats her so hard that she's "black and blue under [her] clothes for days." OMG, she brings up "choice"? This isn't choice if you're being beaten, Liz. It isn't safe if you have bruises, Liz.
.png)
I just read this and holy God! It's just consenting to be abused and used. It doesn't matter how they try to spin it it's garbage. She's basically his slave, in and out of the bedroom. She should wonder why she wants to be treated like that and she should wonder why he wants to treat her like that! Choosing that does not mean you're empowered or a feminist.
“To be honest, it’s rather heartbreaking to realize that how many men view submissives as low-hanging fruit ripe for the plucking. I circulate in my local BDSM community on a regular basis and it can be tough to suss out whose motives are on the level and whose aren’t.” Uh, the reason you’d have to suss out motives is because THERE ARE MOTIVES that are deadly. If it was normal to respectfully beat and r8p women, you wouldn’t have to circulate the community to seek-suss out men who don’t see women as low-hanging fruit. It’s not easy to find because it doesn’t exist. No HVM would ever justify his desire to sexually destroy a woman because he doesn’t have that desire. Like, fine, you think you’re liberating yourself because it’s your choice, but have ya’ll never discussed why HE is turned on by r8p?
This is a rambling, running commentary (that's why it might not make sense.)
Wow. Just wow. Thursday I finished reading Woman Hating, by Andrea Dworkin. She says that BDSM is inherently misogynistic because it reinforces male supremacy. In fact, there's nothing revolutionary about it. I can't believe the author of this article claims to be a feminist while being a submissive. That's so much internalized misogyny that I don't even know where to start.
I'm also reading Sheila Jeffreys, who gives a lovely history of feminism. She says that BDSM started proliferating in the 80's and is a conservative reactionary movement.
Why does her husband get the final say in the home? That's not feminist at all. She is a regular bangmaid. Wow. She cooks, cleans, and does laundry. Her husband beats her so hard that she's "black and blue under [her] clothes for days." OMG, she brings up "choice"? This isn't choice if you're being beaten, Liz. It isn't safe if you have bruises, Liz.
This is so sad.