Former BFF is Marrying the Man Who Assulated Me and Others - and how he wore her down.

My former best friend (through all of high school and college) recently got engaged to a massive scrote. One of my current friends I keep distance from, but we chat once in a while and she broke the news to me. We all used to be friends and I remember when the scrote was just a college friend of my bestie.

He was the stereotypical fat, awkward, stinky, and ugly dude that played the nice guy. He'd come off as friendly, funny, and the life of the party. He was a gamer and would often use that as a pretense for conversation.

He'd sometimes be around at various parties and events but I didn't know him that well. Someone always invited him out of pity. Even with him being such a nice guy, I noticed quickly that a lot of people didn't like him and said they had a bad vibe.

And then one day, my friend ended up bringing him along after some other people bailed on us, and I got to know him better. He definitely seemed to have low self esteem and it was clear the nice guy was just a front and that he had a massive crush on my friend. Well my friend insisted she didn't like him and had a "type" which was the complete opposite of him. During the event, he kept making advances on her and she was rejecting him and clearly uncomfortable. She pulled me aside and asked me to talk to him for her, so I did. He basically admitted that she was way out of his league and he was hoping to "wear her down". I asked him to stop or go home.

The rest of the event unfolded and he started trying to get handsy with her, kept trying to touch her hands, waist, kept brushing up on her, pulling her in too close when we were all dancing... and He'd just keep trying. She asked me to go to the bathroom with her and really she told me she felt so unsafe that she was leaving and needed me to walk her to her car. She said that other women at her college had been saying they didn't feel safe around him either as he was too "pushy" and "handsy" and the dean wasn't doing anything and the women were transferring out of classes to avoid being in the same lectures as him.

I was shocked at this and confused as to how she knew this and would invite him anyways, but I walked her to her car and made sure she was safe. I told her I'd tell the rest of our friend group to not invite him anymore.

She distanced herself from him, but they'd still bump into each other on campus. Me, her, and our other mutual friend would all have girls nights and had a lot of fun without any problems during this time.

Then it got close to Valentines day and he started bumping into her at school and bringing her food and little gifts. Really, he knew her schedule and was starting to stalk her around campus and her favorite snacks and Starbucks were basically bribes to get her to talk to him and sit with him at lunch. Then he started helping her with her assignments and it became him writing her papers and doing them for her. She made deans list and he used it as a time to get her to "see value" and trust him again.

She admitted it to me around this time and we discussed the dangers of plagerism and I reminded her how creepy he had been before and now. She said she still didn't feel safe around him but they were always in the cafeteria or somewhere with lots of people around, and admitted how him helping her and buying her free food was in her words "too good to say no to". She was financially struggling and her family was poor (they also discouraged junk and fast foods and he knew this so he'd indulge her). She also was a C student (her parents always made her help around the house and work so she never had enough time to study) and he preyed on that. Her parents also hated him because her other friend would often tell them how he was so rude and destroyed property at her big parties.

She told me even though she was dating a guy she really liked, that the scrote was just too useful and improving her life too much to say no. She even begged me to keep him away from her and to talk to him if he was at any events we went to. She said she knew that if he got the right opportunity to be alone with her, that he'd "try something".

I offered to tutor her at this time and begged her to stop the study sessions with him, and to even talk to the dean about how he was following her around - but she didn't listen. My boyfriend and other friends were so aware of him and had seen him being creepy and she wouldn't listen To any of us.

She started to get more serious with the guy she was seeing then, and tried to create a little space between her and the scrote. But her grades started falling and her parents cracked down and he started studying with tye scrote again. Her boyfriend found out and started pulling away from her (barely seeing or texting her). Another big event was coming up and she was hoping her boyfriend would ask her, and instead he completely ghosted her. She was so upset that she went to the scrotes study session and ended up telling him everything that happened.

Scrote offered to buy her a new outfit and take her out instead. She agreed and he went and spent a lot of money on a whole new outfit for her - and told me how scrote was actually such a caring and good guy that she wanted to "give him a chance" but she just "couldn't get herself to be attracted to him" and felt the ick anytime she would think of if they'd get intimate. I reminded her that maybe she was just feeling vulnerable because of the breakup and it's best to tell him no, let herself heal, study on her own, and stay away from him because he was creepy many times before.

But she accepted the dress and instead of going on the date with a scrote, wore it to a date with a new dude she met on OLD. then she posted it and told said scrote how she just couldn't do it.

This made him even more hell bent on her. Cue the madonna/whore complex because now he saw his dream girl as a whore and evil and he was seeking to out her in her place. He schemed and she finally was leaving the scrote behind to entertain the tinder dude. She created distance from me and everyone as the tinder guy became her priority unfortunately.

So things were fine until summer came around. One of our mutual friends was having a party and me and my other friend went together. We agreed not to drink that night because my boyfriend (who'd always keep an eye on us and DD) was away. He'd been very public with telling and posting how he was traveling so everyone (including the scrote) knew.

Well we rolled up to the event and everything was great until the scrote showed up. Everyone all stayed away from him and a bunch of the dudes started making fun of him and kept asking why he was invited. Me and her decided to stick together and away from where he was. But he kept being loud and obnoxious and me and her agreed we'd get leaving soon. We went to start gathering out stuff and I went to use ghe bathroom before leaving.

When I came out of the bathroom, my friend was gone. The bathroom was in the house and down a hallway, quiet and far away from everyone and the festivities.

So I'm quickly walking down the hallway and all of a sudden the scrote pops out of some other room, like he was waiting for me. He blocked my way from the way back to the party and had this smug look on his face. He said something like "hey howve you been? Where's your boyfriend?" And as I answered and tried to walk away he shoved me by the shoulders, held me there, and started confessing to me that he always had a crush on me, and that my other friend just won't give him a chance, and thinks I'm nicer and smarter than her and how my boyfriend didn't deserve me. I got really scared and looked but no one was around.

I told him that I wasn't interested and my friend was waiting for me, outside. But he wouldn't let me go. He started saying "why haven't we hooked up" and saying that he could prove to me that I didn't need my boyfriend. All the while, he started touching my hips and waist and then grabbed my butt. That's when instinct took over and I kicked him hard and he recoiled and I ran to where we parked the car. My friend was helping someone carry stuff and said they asked so that's where she went. I told her we needed to leave now.

Later my other friend asked how the party was and I told her the scrote was there and she said he wasn't supposed to be and she was glad she didn't show up. I told her what happened and she seemed genuinely upset and started telling me that he'd do the same things to her at parties and he even did it during one of their tutoring sessions and he'd always pressure her to drink and hookup at the parties. At this point, we agreed he was assaulting women and that he'd be raping whenever he had the chance.

After that I stopped going to anything with groups of peiple that he may be at. My boyfriend and I just started inviting only 1 or 2 friends over at a time and became a close knit group. When school started up again, we heard that he was taking a semester off and that he'd be transferring. I'm not sure if she reported anything but she didn't talk to him for that whole year.

And then, she had a family member pass and had a bunch of badly ending tinder flings. Her grades were bad and she had to retake classes. Her parents were giving her grief. She'd post about it and when she was at her lowest, he started popping up in her life again. She started opening up to him, he started doing her courses basically for her, and he started having an "extra ticket" to all her favorite concerts and expensive events that she couldn't afford. When she'd tell him she wasn't attracted to him, he'd insist they were just "friends". Basically he started becoming a sugar daddy and then the events started getting further and further from where they lived after she was already feeling comfortable with the local events. He kept pushing and pushing her tolerance and his creepiness a little at a time and his initial plan of "wearing her down" was starting to work.

He somehow got money to this sold out concert in a very fun and popular major city - and of course he magically had a 2nd ticket he couldn't find anyone else willing to go 🙄 BUT he was saying that with the distance and traffic and it being late it was "too dangerous to drive home" so HE ALREADY BOOKED A HOTEL ROOM. "I can just sleep on the cot if you don't feel comfortable" he told her.

She started bragging to me how lucky and special she was to be picked to get to see this concert and how he knew all these great restaurants and shops he was gonna bring her along to them while they were there. She told me about the hotel and I was like he'll no! He's gonna get you drunk and rape you. He will pressure you into it or just get physical. Wtf would you agree to go? Get your own hotel if you're so bent on going!

But she started to say that he was buying her an outfit and heels for the day and he already dropped $300 on that. She was starting to say that she felt like sex with hin was obligatory - she truly felt that it was the least she could do for him as there was no way she could afford to do "anything else" for what the whole thing was costing. She still insited that he was so gross and started saying she'd "need string alcohol" to hope it'd be quick and done.

My friend and I couldn't talk any sense into her. We tried compromising with more local and affordable things. She wouldn't budge.

She kept blowing my phone up the whole time she was with him. She seemed so uncomfortable and I knew she was using the phone to create distance from him. But I noticed he kept buying her drinks all night and she later told me she did sleep with him to get it over with. Apparently she had been drunk and couldn't walk in the heels he bought her and he carried her back to the hotel....

And she told him how she couldn't "keep a man" around for more than a month or so. The scrote was saying the same thing and after they slept together they jokingly said they'd just marry each other if they couldn't find anyone else by the time they hit 30. She didn't like the sex but she liked the "gifts and all the traveling" he did with her and paid for and started telling me how she wished she found him attractive. She started saying that whenever she'd see him she'd close her and eyes and even call him other names and dress him in different outfits to resemble more of her type of guys. She kept reaching out to other dudes but they'd realize she had the scrote around and they'd stop bothering. She'd also throw herself at them hard core in the most desperate pickme style you could imagine. And then she'd show up to the partied and events without him, start drinking, and tell everyone awful things about him. She'd be pubically trying to embarass him saying in detail how bad he was in bed and how smelly and gross he was.... and she'd still keep seeing him 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

So they started dating, officially. After college she couldn't get a job and her parents were threatening to throw her out. Guess who moved her into his parents basement and paid for her car? Him. She sgreed to be official when she had nowhere to go.

This scrote preyed on her - he used every opportunity and vulnerability to "wear her down". She fell into the role of bang maid because she felt it was the "least she could do to pull her weight" since they didn't have to pay rent. Then, She had to start working because of all the debt he accumulated over the years- when she started working and paying bills he became unemployed. She's already used to being the bang maid, now she's also the breadwinner and she's doing it all. The scrote just sits on his ass and blows the extra money on video games and anime junk. Now money is tight and she can't afford to not work and her parents cut her off when she started dating him. She burnt all her bridges for him and he made sure to twist and trap her up so leaving I'd nearly impossible for her.

And a few days before her 30th birthday, he bought her the cheapest and most generic ring and gave it to her in the basement. He didn't even do anything special or romantic and she's been going around and even reached out to my other friend to brag how they're engaged and look at my fake diamond ring!

This is why scrotes are so dangerous and why being a pickme is also very dangerous. She knew the entire time and he preyed on her and had her so twisted and trapped up ! She believes the sunk cost fallacy and she's settled.

Of course me and my friend are the "jealous" and "bitter single women" who won't talk to her or him. Sorry for the long read but there's so many lessons to unpack here.