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Beside obvious red flags regarding animal treatment while dating I would like to point out the subtle detail that I noticed retrospectively from my past LV-ex and his treatment of my pet.
He would be warm and playful with my cat but when my cat would act out or do some nasty stuff that cats usually do, he would get agressively angry. I mean in a way that feels wrong since it is directed to an animal who did not have known better. He never voiced or acted out to my cat but subtlety of directed anger could be traced if I knew better.
I couldn't quite put my finger on what was wrong UNTIL I witnessed how my brother treated his gf's cat while visiting him. So, basically cat found the wet cat food at night and dragged it along the expensive Persian carpet. He was a bit pissed but in a paternalistic way and blamed himself for not hiding the wet food properly and now he has to live with the consequences of cleaning it up. He did not even had any agressiveness towards cat and in fact called his gf and asked if he should have gave him more food than he was instructed to. (He was looking after his gf cat for the first time while she was gone).
My brother was always afraid & indifferent to cats and dogs. However, he never ever hurt or acted agressively when my cat would attack and annoy him. He would just freeze to a playful cat and ask me to take the cat away cause he might hurt him by accident if he moves or just annoy cat further.
Looking back, I realized why my ex's reaction did not sit right with me. He was just winning points by being nice to my pet and in similar situation like my brother he might have had petty retialiation to my 🐈. I would rather prefer blunt honesty like my brother who can look after responsibly but a bit indifferent to pets than acting out love while treating them differently when pets are not living up to the best behaviour as expected.
I guess it comes off as word salad but my cat is very important to me and I was thinking about red flags and yellow flags on pet treatment during dating so decided to share.
I would appreciate if Queens have anything to add!
I was roommates with a NVM man who "chased" his gf's cat around the house, which stressed the cat out so much it would pee itself. The man laughed, and gave the excuse that "he just doesn't like animals" and "the cat's a little shit". The gf had no boundaries or self worth and I was the one who eventually had to confront the man about his treatment of the cat, which stopped.
Later on in the year I lived w them, he verbally and mentally abused his gf for getting a taco bell order wrong, would joke about leaving her for a supermodel (she chased him and pursued him until he gave in), and ended up gaslighting me and mentally abusing me so badly I had to go to therapy and moved back in with my parents. He knew I could see exactly who he was, I caught him in several lies and knew he was cheating on his gf but I had no proof - he was TERRIFIED of me. Just LIVING with him wrecked my mental health so badly I had nightmares about living with them for a year after, and had to seek professional counselling. Imagine DATING this man.
A man who "hates animals" is a psychopath. Full stop. You can not want to live with animals, but mistreating them for fun is psychopath behavior. A good man will never torment something smaller and weaker than him.