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Story starts in 2020. I was working with and friends with a girl (lets call her Amy). She invited me and another girl friend of mine to come on an overnight group wine tasting trip in Niagara Falls with a bunch of her friends. On this trip I met one of her “best friends”, a guy named Sam. I put “best friends” in quotations because she is unfortunately not an FDS-er and doesn’t realize/understand that no man can ever be just a woman’s “friend”. I also eventually found out that they had met on bumble but she wasn’t attracted to him so they remained “friends”.
On this trip, obviously there was drinking involved (a lot of it), and the whole group stayed in this cabin/air bnb. Sam and I were the last ones to stay up and we were basically showing each other porn videos and joking around etc. (gross I know- but this was pre-FDS).
We went to sleep in my bed and just cuddled before falling asleep.
There was no sex because I was a virgin at that time (and technically still am to this day). (Btw I said “technically”, because my ex and I tried to have sex but couldn’t because he was a pornsick scrote with a broken cock that couldn’t get or stay hard).
After the trip, we texted a bit and hung out like once but there was no attraction (from my side) so I stopped talking to him.
About a year later, I went to Amy’s house to hang out and Sam was there. We all hung out and Amy eventually went to bed but said Sam and I could chill a bit more at hers, and Sam offered to drive me home.
We ended up making out and humping semi-nude before he dropped me off.
This was right before (literally a week or so) before I met my (now ex BF who I dated for 8 months), so Sam and I didn’t really talk after this night. For other reasons which I won’t get into, Amy and I had also lost contact for some time after this (and she had also moved provinces).
After my ex and I broke up, I unblocked Sam and we would text on and off (flirting/sexual texting etc.), for me it was mainly amusement and to pass time (I know this is not an ideal way to pass time though lol).
A few nights ago I was hanging out with the same female friend who had attended the wine trip with me (and therefore knew Amy). I am not on insta anymore, but that friend showed me Amy’s story showing she was back in our city visiting (and literally was in the exact same area that my friend and I were chilling in). Sam was also in her story which meant they were chilling together. I told my friend to text Amy and give her my number cause I wanted to see her if she was free that night. She texted me and since everything was closing that night, we (me, Amy and Sam) decided to go and chill at her Airbnb. She ordered a bottle for delivery and Sam and I went to the convenience store to get chase and snacks. We didn’t really even drink the bottle (I was already a tiny bit drunk from being out earlier, but not inebriated by any means). Amy passed out on the bed and Sam and I stayed up talking.
He stepped away to use the bathroom or something, and I don’t know why but I wanted to see what would happen if I pretended to be passed out too, so I closed my eyes and pretended to sleep on the couch.
He came back, saw I was passed out AND STARTED TOUCHING ME. He just rubbing my legs and putting his hand near my vagina, and I couldn’t keep a straight face so I opened my eyes and was like wtf.
I don’t actually know if he was just touching me to see if I would get up but perhaps that is possible. I don’t really remember what he said about it but I went to go and sleep in the bed with Amy (I should have just ubered home tbh but I was tried and wanted to sleep).
I don’t believe anything happened after that but I just wanted to remind you all to prioritize your safety above anything else (we are all smart ladies though so it goes without saying).
Always keep extra cash/funds on you to call a uber/taxi. It could save you.
Also when I say to never sleep or pass out around men who aren’t your BF/husband, I also mean even not sleeping at a friends house who has a BF/brother/cousin/other male relative around. TRUST NO ONE.
This how most of my sexual molestations happened as a child was during sleep overs at friends houses. One of their relatives waited till we all fell asleep, then I'd be awakened with some males fingers inside my vagina, at age of 9/10/11. One time it was the girls grandfather, at a different sleep over it was that girls older brother. So yes, don't do it. Even when in relationships, if my bf tries to do anything sexual to me while I'm asleep, it's extremely triggering for me. I have PTSD with my most recent ex, with the way I could never sleep because sex was always expected before or during sleep or demanded in the a.m. as soon as my eyes would flutter open.
Yup, that’s sexual assault. 😡
Thank you for the reminder! You are absolutely right in that women can't even sleep in the same house/apartment as most men without putting herself at bodily risk. It's fucked up.
I hate men 😒