Nonmonogamy is abuse

normal people don't engage in polyamory or stuff like that.

Polyamorous men are abusive. polymarous women... don't know what their problem is, but they need therapy.

I look at the bright side to poly being "trendy" these days - guys are more likely to disclose it upfront, giving me a chance to get away from them immediately.

Sure, they might do the bait and switch, and you don't find out until they think you're too invested to leave. But scrotes do that whether poly is trendy or not.

People who consider themselves "ethically non-monogamous" will look down on those who aren't upfront about it. At least that's better than the discourse before this one, that used to go something like "humans aren't meant to be monogamous! So it's perfectly fine for me to spring polyamory on other people whether they agreed to it or not!"

Yeah, low bar. But still, good to see an improvement over... that.

Some of us come from cultures where "one man, many women" goes back to ancient times, much further back than the 1970s. Ironic that some people think they're doing "progress" when they are setting humanity back thousands of years.

When I was on dating apps the whole ENM/poly crap really pissed me off. Funnily enough, you could usually tell which men were into it before reading their profiles. They tend to be quiet unattractive, and look like they have a mental disorder.

I really don't understand why anyone would engage in polyamory. When I was growing up in the 80s and 90s, many people looked down on the 70s with it's wife-swapping and swinging. I never imagined that swinging would be repackaged as polyamory and would come back. It amuses me that these polyamorous people think that they're so original and free-thinking when they're doing something that went out with the 70s. I shudder to think of all the STD's and unwanted pregancies that result from these types of arrangements. After all, if only one person in the group gets an STD, chances are they'll all get it. I don't see the appeal at all.

Even if you happily and eagerly did the depraved sex act they'll STILL treat you like garbage, cheat on you and leave you.

I am no longer triggered by this sick phenomenon (waste of energy and it's not in my personal universe anyway), but I still can feel sorry for the women who don't tolerate it and one day find out their seemingly committed partners are this kind of scrotes. I would be offended to put it lightly.

Anything other than hypergamy for women, honestly, is abuse. In this patriarchal/misogynistic world, loyalty to any man on a woman's part is oppression.

I usually consider polyamory abuse in these circumstances.

1. Men with OPP: one penis (his) policies.

   
   

2. As coercion/leverage to avoid separation.

   
   

3. Hidden (ie: cheating) ENM.

   
   

4. And most importantly: any other reasons.

I agree.

I used to want to do polyamory/nonmonogamy and even bought that book for it. Maybe I can shed light on why a woman might be attracted to this philosophy.

The reason was, I had just gotten out of a long term relationship and wanted to date but didn't want anything serious for a while. I didn't want to be a girlfriend again right away and liked being single. It felt like the males around me were trying to hurriedly snatch me, control me, and hoard me away like a dragon's gold. It felt very controlling and I thought being polyamorous would give me more freedom.

There was one guy I was interested in and wanted to date him, but I didn't want to just immediately and permanently commit to him like males try to demand. So I offered to be his girlfriend, which I didn't really want, if we were polyamorous, so I could pretend I was more free. I wasn't jealous of the idea of him being with another woman because I didn't really care about the relationship.

It is so stupid. When I want to commit, the males want casual. When I want casual, the males want to trap me ASAP. They lie lie lie, to us and to themselves. They lie so much that they don't even know what they want most of the time. They all have a legit case of oppositional defiance disorder.

What I didn't realize was that I wanted to start dating but do it slowly with a scrotation and no commitment until I actually want it. I wanted to be single but I also wanted to have sex, which is the contradiction. I realize now it's not safe or healthy. I was trying to have my cake and eat it too, which males can do but females get hurt when they try.

I was too naive to realize that males would rather be oppositional crybabies and lie to you and fuck with your head, rather than just... have a fun casual sexual relationship with a beautiful woman with a high sex drive. I guess... that's just not enough for them. Free sex basically handed to them. All this male had to do was keep being sorta nice and he couldn't even do that... I could probably sense that he wasn't worth much and that's why I didn't want a real relationship with him in the first place.

I definitely made some mistakes but it taught me just how ridiculous and irrational men are. They legitimately destroy everything for no reason at all. I wrongly thought that I would be more free, but adding more males never increases female freedom.

I personally at first hated the idea of a polygamous relationship. But then I see the amount of undesirable parasitic males and I can understand why a billionare would choose to have multiple wives. I personally wouldn’t do it, but it’s much more beneficial for multiple women to be with one billionare man than to be in a monogamous marriage with an average scrote who will use you as a bang maid, incubator, servant, maid. LEGIT getting nothing in return.

If your partner wants to or "agrees" to be "polyamorous" with you, they do not see you as a viable long term partner. You're just a stop-gap until they find the right person whether they realize it or not. And my exceedingly hot take is that I think the women who enter into throuples with one man and another woman are lesbians with internalized homophobia who cant bring themselves to act on their female attraction without also involving a man in the relationship