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So, after 3 children and I'm in my 40's. My third child was born 11yrs ago. My body has taken a hit aesthetically. However, I have worked damn hard on using what I have and making it the best I can with fitness. My body is looking good I do admit and I've found a new hobby that I socialise too. My stomach muscles are covered in severe stretch marks above my belly button and the docs said my stomach wall had collapsed and was irreversible. But I've toned it and I now have a toned stomach. Stretch marks are still visable but improved as much as they can. I'm actually learning to embrace them and now wear clothes to show my toned stomach even if the marks are visable. It's quite empowering. BUT....one thing I can't improve are my breasts. They are literally cup size B empty sandbags. I wonder about the future as in all honesty no man will find my breasts appealing! And I don't want no fuggly LV man lol! A HV man surely wouldn't want a woman with my breasts that's for sure. My previous relationships I very rarely removed my bra. So I'm thinking plastic surgery one day. But also don't want to waste money and pain over preferred aesthetics to make me feel less subjected to the; "a woman's sexual market goes down with age".
What are your thoughts here?
Choosing to be with a woman on the basis of the shape of her breasts is epically LVM behaviour.
It’s great to feel good about looking good and I’m glad you’ve found fitness to be empowering and socially rewarding. I do too! But if you believe you need perky breasts to attract a HVM, I’m very sad for you sis. You’re worth more than that.
AN HVM WILL CHOOSE YOU AND GENUINELY LOVE AND RESPECT YOU REGARDLESS OF YOUR BODY.
My advice is to remove a man from the equation and do what will benefit you.
I had size GG breasts that hung to my belly button. Finding clothes, a bra and swimwear to fit properly was an expensive nightmare that reduced me to tears and self-loathing. The size of my breasts caused back and shoulder aches and I still have indentations in my shoulders from bra straps.
I finally bit the bullet and booked in for a breast reduction. I saw the best surgeon in my city (also a female with an all-female team alongside her - double win!) and had them reduced to the smallest size possible. In my case, this was to a DD, so still a handful, but they balance out my hips perfectly and I now look hourglass instead of just top heavy.
I adore them and wished I had done it years ago. My back pain is gone and buying new clothes is now a breeze.
If you think a breast lift or implants will make you happier with your physique, then absolutely do it, but what a man thinks should not even factor in your decision, as it is your body.
Good luck!
my mom is in her late 50's and has had a boob job, face lift, lip fillers, etc. Every procedure is very painful and will knock you out of commission for weeks. Do you have someone who can take care of you 24/7 while you recover? You will be bruised and hurt all over. The doctors like to give you more than you ask for always (like if you want c's you'll probably get double d's).
My mom does get tons of compliments and attention from men (as young as their 20's) BUT she is an absolute creepy scrote magnet and I cant even go to the grocery store with her without a creeper trailing us and trying to chat her up.
My dad never cared if she got surgery or not and never encouraged her to get any of this. Shes very into celebrity culture and had a narc mom who was heavily into diet and beauty culture. My dad always took care off her after surgery though. And my mom raised her daughters not to have the same eating and body image disorders she had, but she herself is still very stuck in it. It is addictive I think and you might start getting more procedures after the first one.
Spending money to get sliced up and sewn back together + revisions, complications, and life-long maintenance, for some hypothetical HVM who thinks a mother's natural body isnt good enough, doesnt sound like a good idea.
I bet your boobs look 200% better than you think.
There are many, many women walking around, in happy relationships with saggy breasts. It's perfectly natural. Most people have no idea because women wear bras in public, or supportive swimwear. Take a look at some "National Geographic" photos of nude tribeswomen. You'll get the picture. Breasts come in all shapes and sizes and do not define us.
HVMs don't care about the size or shape of a woman's breasts.
You don't need to change your body. I would suggest self-love affirmations and therapy instead. The more happy and confident with yourself you are, the more attractive you become.
A hv won't care about the shape of your breasts. If you are looking into cosmetic surgery please consider a lift and not implants.
You should do it for your own self esteem..not because males will find perky tits attractive. But as someone who's had Breast reconstruction surgery (not breast augmentation) I did it because I had severe genetic deformities, but once you put an implant in, you have to keep getting them taken out and put back in your entire life. My popped at 5 years. The you've got to cut open your breast again, take that one out, put a new one in, then that one pops too. I got a severe infection when my first one popped. Saline, where the saline water was contaminated and all that bacteria rushed my system destroying my immune system. I was held on the hospital for 5 days because they thought I was going to die from an opportunistic infection, since my white cells were destroyed. Anyways, it's not always what it's cracked up to be. I also suffered from silicone syndrome for 3 years too. Things to consider.
Whatever makes YOU happy. Most people are in relationships not because of the boobs. If you gonna do the surgery there's a lot more risk involved with implants than with lift surgery alone. Also breast tissue tends to grow during perimenopause. Might be a bummer to have a major surgery only for breasts to grow and sag right after. Which brings to another point: most women have sagging breasts with age. Unless you date a coomer, your dude won't think or say anything about it. Don't compare yourself to celebrities, they have maintenance surgeries as a lifestyle and everything you see is photoshopped and filtered anyway.
Men are told their "dad bods" are sexy. And they do not give birth! Why is it then that women, who carry children to term and give birth are made to feel like their bodies aren't good enough (to men!) and need "mommy makeovers". I call BS. That being said, I have had a rhinoplasty and a breast lift with implants. Neither procedure has significantly improved my self esteem or quality of life. Recovery was horrendous even though my surgeries were successful, I am young and healthy and I only have a dog. I can't imagine going through those surgeries with several children to take care of. It sounds like you are fit and taking excellent care of yourself. I love to hear it! Recovery from surgery requires taking weeks or months off exercise, in the best case scenario. Surgeries are expensive and risky (while the risk is small, you can absolutely die under general anesthesia and leave your children without a mother). There is no guarantee you will be happy with the results. But ultimately the choice is yours. Just remember a man would be told he is aging like fine wine...
Improve your looks if you want to. It has nothing to do with your market value. Looks matter and always will, there is nothing wrong with accepting it. It’s not wrong for men to care about a woman’s looks, it’s just predatory men loves to prey on young women and make it about looks, when it’s not. Those men would ignore anyone about 25 regardless of looks.
Just don’t go overboard with it.