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Those words were uttered by my brother after mom died last month.
My parents split up for the final time about 12 years ago and she never moved on. She couldn't put the hurt behind her and became even worse.
As a woman, I couldn't look up for her as a role model because when push came to shove, she was a pick me.
This woman used to smugly yap on about how if dad ever cheated, she unleash her worst on him. Well, when it happened, I waited for this independent woman to emerge, the one I'd heard about all my life. Instead I saw a sniveling pick me begging to have her man back and status quo resume. Pathetic.
Overall, the trajectory of her life was a sad one.
I can't help but think if she had stayed single, she would have been sooo much happier and not have met the lonely demise she did. I think singlehood might have kept her more sane.
Instead, she got married 'late' at 30 to a man much younger than her. First child came along and she stopped working. She was the SAHM who held it down while dad travelled a lot for work.
He took and took and took.
She thought she was getting away with something.
She was, until she wasn't.
He walked out, and her life ended.
He ruined her.
She had nothing left and refused to "lower" herself to go out and seek friends, community, and more. She never met a relationship she couldn't detonate. Being mentally ill will do that to you.
She absolutely was her own worst enemy and could have prevented a lot of her own problems. But if she had stayed single, a lot of those problems wouldn't have arrived at her doorstep.
As an FDSer, I saw a woman get used by a man then discarded. Not worth it. Not at all. Stay single. You'll never regret not giving your everything to someone else.