Fantasizing the HV Life instead of Men

Part of my FDS journey involved changing my mindset: instead of dreaming about a prince charming type of guy saving me, I created a different type of dream. This helped me decenter men further from my life and goals, gave me more strength and hope, and helped me stay even further away from the "clock is ticking" and "hitting the wall" fallacies. I encourage everyone to create their own "fantasy" about a high value life without men in it especially as a single woman.

Before FDS, I used to secretly dream and fantasize about a man sweeping me off my feet and getting me out of my lackluster hometown. I dreamed that he'd be well off and cultured and show me the finer things in life- my family didn't have a lot of money growing up and I was always fascinated with the finer things in life. My parents weren't truly supportive or present in my life and my grandparents did what they could to raise me - so I always craved going on vacations and spending quality time with a man. Maybe he could get me out of there I'd hope because I didn't have the support and resources I needed to save myself at that time. I struggled in college with my grades and mental health and floundered in my early and mid 20s.

Finally I found FDS and realized from scrote exes that LVM would only further drag me down.

And now I'm close to 30, I made it out of my home town, started a successful small business, have my own place, and work a part time job in the city. As more and more of my coworkers and former classmates settle for any scrote that will have them, I'm honestly not feeling pressured to settle for anything. Instead of fantasizing about a baby and marriage or a price charming, I daydream about what it'll be like to go into my 30s and 40s as a high value woman.

I'm excited for my 30s. I already feel like I've found a better version of me who doesn't focus on competing with other women, who doesn't engage in gossip, who doesn't tolerate any nonsense from family or friends. I've cutoff friends and family members to protect my mental health. I've started to find my own voice and I'm okay with being a "bitch" who is assertive and speaks up for herself rather than being a doormat or pickme people pleaser. I've started setting boundaries.

I've become so much better of a cook and improved my sewing skills. There's less people in my circle now, but I have a much deeper and more enjoyable time when I do see them.

I picture myself moving into a nicer place in the city in my 30s and having my sanctuary and my peace. Dressing and doing my makeup for myself, cooking for myself, taking a nice hot bath, and cultivating HV friendships with other women. I aspire to get my finances back on track and have the ability to take myself traveling and to museums and more cultured attractions. I'll only be picking up after a dog or cat here and there and thoroughly enjoying their company rather than picking up after a LVM.

I dont want kids and part of my joy is imagining me having the extra money and energy to spend on myself. I'd rather put that into volunteer work and transitioning into a new career perhaps. I imagine myself feeling fulfilled.

I aspire to be like my "cool aunt" who is single and went into business, travels, and spends her free time traveling and going out with similar minded friends. My one coworker is older and happily divorced - she is roommates with other women, enjoys her job, and seems so genuinely happy. She cooks, goes out with her friends and her son, and spends time on her hobbies. Her life is filled with family and friends and she isn't stressed or tired. She's not even close to the "hit the wall bitter / old maid" fallacy that scrotes use as scare tactics.

I'm not against dating - but it's the last thing on my mind. If a man would enter my life, he really needs to add value to it. Even now my life isn't ideal and neither are my finances - but I'm overall happy with how I treat myself and the progress I have made - I am so happy even now that I wouldn't trade or risk it for a scrote. I imagine when I become more successful and get on my feet again it'll be even harder to sacrifice! This is why I encourage all women to date yourselves and give yourself a life where you are treated well - it'll keep you goal oriented and less likely to settle for scotes.