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This is a continuation of the post: The problem with MODERN dating mentality (Part 1)
5) HOW OBSESSIVE WE ARE WITH BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP
🔎 You have your own career, your own money, your own car, your own house, you are free to go everywhere and do anything you want to do freely -- the kind of freedom our ancestors can only dream on.
🔎 But somehow, someway -- all those doesn't mean jack sh*t unless you are with a man. You grew up just thinking, wishing, dreaming, hoping, yearning for a man. The prince charming, white knight, your handsome savior ready to save you from the life you are currently living. The life your ancestors can only dream in their sleep.
🔎 I would even argue that back in the days where women were forced to marry for survival -- most of them are far more reluctant to get into relationship with a man and would use all their free time to savor the limited freedom they had before being wed.
🔎 Now? F**king 5 YEARS OLD start talking about wanting a boyfriend FFS.
🔎 Sure, "Modern" dating mentality taught young girls "You are free to do whatever you want with your body" -- but also treat they like an absolute freak if they don't have a boyfriend by this age and don't have sex by that age.
🔎 And making fun of virginity like it is something so worthless, so undesirable, so bottom level trash that unless those girls give it away as soon as possible -- they are literally Frankenstein.
WTF IS THIS BULLSH*T???
🔎 It is like nothing, nothing matters aside from being in relationship with a man. That's all we are thought to think about, care about day in day out. Being single and not in a relationship is "wrong" -- so utterly and completely "wrong" that people start treating you differently once they know you are single and being careful with relationship.
🔎 To the point that we have to justify why we are single. Like it is a Goddamn bloody SIN.
🔎 Women are ashamed -- ASHAMED to be seen as single and "undesirable" to the point some rather be mistresses and forever girlfriends of 10 years, living together, paying all the bills, doing all the chores, bore all the children -- because that is better than being single and choosy, apparently.
🔎 Now that women can buy their own house -- they let men moved in with them. MOVED. IN. Can you not see just how RIDICULOUS that is??? No honey, "the economy" is not any of your problem -- that is your house. He is the man. DOES HE NOT HAVE ANY SHAME???
🔎 YOU KNOW WHAT LATCHES ONTO A FEMALE IN THE ANIMAL KINGDOM?? PARASITE. BLOODY. F**KING. PARASITE.
🔎 It baffles me to see our modern generation so completely obsessed with relationship, with being a man that they develop mental and psychological illness from not being in a relationship.
🔎 Now women can truly be free and have it all -- and instead of becoming what our ancestors hope we can be in their stead -- we instead voluntary go chase that man and beg to be shackled to him. Even paying for the dates and wedding ourselves (because EqUaLiTy) and drag his ass to the altar.
AND NO -- DOING 50/50 IS NOT "EQUALITY". IT IS YOU BEGGING HIM TO "PICK" YOU BY OFFERING HIM MONEY AND YOURSELF. You pay him to sleep with you.
Take a step back and try to think -- just why are modern women so obsessed with men, with being in a relationship to the point that we just -- excuse my honesty -- become extremely stupid?
I tried to understand it -- I started a relationship once in high school just to try to understand -- and I still don't get it. It was boring and a complete waste of my time -- I have so many other things to do. Unless than man can be a full provider and protector for me and make my life wayyyy better than what I can do on my own -- I don't get it.
Are modern women that bored?
Stay tuned, and stay safe.
man. The prince charming, white knight, your handsome savior ready to save you from the life you are currently living. The life your ancestors can only dream in their sleep.
This. My life got better when I realized that instead of hoping I'd meet some Prince Charming-type, I could *be* my own Prince Charming and pamper *myself*, without waiting for someone to do it for me. All this helps my brain realize that I deserve nice things even without someone else thinking I do. Undoing all the Disney idealized romance messaging I grew up with takes time, but I *will* do it.
Definitely agree with this post. I think another problem with the modern dating mentality (as well as traditional) is the idea that women need a husband to have children. It's a patriarchal concept rooted in the need for men to control women's sexuality and ensure paternity so that they can pass property and titles down to their sons. We are told that being a single mother is the worst thing in the world. There is so much misogynistic hate against single mothers and single women in general. The fact is that, sure when women were property and couldn't own property or support themselves, they did need a husband to have a family. Now? They absolutely don't. They need sperm, everything else they can provide themselves.
For me, the only reason I have ever pursued marriage/a domestic relationship is for the prospect of having children. I know not all women want children this definitively but many do. I'm not totally asexual, I enjoy sex with men and I've developed feelings for men but I've never wanted to tie myself down to one for life. I have spent my 20s rushing into relationships and accepting men who objectively made my life worse because I felt compelled by social expectations to find a stable relationship in order to have children. So after years of bad relationships and a divorce with one child, I've given up on dating and had a 2nd child via sperm donor. Although its not the purpose of FDS, FDS helped me to give up on relationships haha- I've never even met a high value man, and those that seemed to be on the surface ended up having their own issues. I don't think anyone who wants children should waste their fertile years waiting on a HVM that may never appear. I definitely don't think anyone should get into a relationship with a LVM to have children and let the man ruin your life (been there). If you know you will regret not having children, consider a sperm donor!
I've never been happier since I gave up on dating. I've been a single mother for almost 7 years and while I can't say it's for everyone, it's fantastic for me. Make all the decisions with no interference and no risk of a bad influence low value father? Yes please. I have no interest in looking for a man but if one were to pursue me, I would cautiously consider but on the first red flag dump. Not sure that I would ever want to live with him. He would need to be bringing 100% positives to my life to be worth it.
One thing that always bothered me is how some people seems to put so much importance to a woman’s virginity when it doesn’t really mean much. Why make such a big deal of whether you are virgin or not by certain age and waste time debating about that, when we could be discussing things that are actually should have our attention and in general are more important?
I think it really has to do with absent fathers and low self esteem. I don't want to go all Freudian but in my opinion some women crave validation from men (me included... sigh) because they have never had it in their childhood. Why not introduce the term LVF (low value father)? LVM attract more LVM in your life, it's a fact. The only physical touch I have ever had with my father in the 20+ years I've been on this Earth has been his pinky finger touching mine and him slapping my butt "jokingly". Maybe once or twice he hugged me awkwardly but I'm not really sure. He is only able to express his love with money. He isn't a bad person in my eyes, he loves me in his own way, but we should expect WAYYY more from fathers. We should really create some form of global resistance. If every woman on this Earth only had sex with HVM in a generation LVFs would stop existing, and so called "daddy issues" (ugh I hate this term) would disappear as well.
I literally remember wanting a boyfriend at age 5 🤦🏼♀ Much different from now. Thank you for another 🔥🔥🔥
Humans are generally creatures with social needs. Perhaps women have more of that need generally. I can say that I’ve wanted a boyfriend since I started puberty. I had a crappy first one. And later a crappy situationship. Now I’m a little older and still long to be wholly seen by a loving boyfriend. I don’t agree with what was said about 50/50. Best friends, cats and vibrators aren’t a replacement for a truly awesome man. Those things can be cool but it’s just not the same. I’ve been to therapy and read the handbook so don’t bother to suggest those.