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His girlfriend.... I only know she's his wife because my dad told me. Seems like he hasn't told any one else that he legally got married already. Just makes me wonder about their dynamic and if she's okay. I'm happy for her that she gets to stay in the country and I get that my bro was doing her a favor helping her stay, after years of dating.
I hear she cooks him dinner every night too which is nice, but it makes me question if she's happy with this "secret" marriage. I do get why people marry for papers and I'm not judging them. So idk why I'm feeling off put. Maybe it's because I can imagine my brother receiving wife treatment, but maybe he doesn't treat her like his wife yet considering he tells me she's his gf.
my family is Vietnamese and his wife is too, she just didn't have permanent residence in the us until she married my brother on paper.
I can see things going very bad for her if this marriage feels more serious to her than him.
I understand it's their business and I wouldn't interfere. I guess I just want fellow FDS thoughts.
It sounds like your brother isn't excited to be married to her.
No issues with marrying for a green card, I know folks who have done it for a myriad of reasons. What gives me pause is that it feels transactional instead of romantic. He should be excited to tell people she's his wife — especially right after they just got married. But he's hiding it... That doesn't bode well. He wants to keep his bang maid private so he can meet his dream girl? I hope not.
Are you worried that your brother is being a scrote?
I am an immigrant. I am all for women maximizing their benefits, including immigration benefits, especially if they can do it safely. Good for her!
They have been dating for years and he’s in his early 30s; while she’s in her late 20s .
Possibly they are not dating anymore, or he is looking to date someone else. I don't know how Green Card works in that case. Either way seems like not the best situation for her. Sad reminder why dating for years without engagement even if you are young doesn't work.
i think you should mind your business. people marry for papers all the time, most pay for it so she is fortunate to have had someone that she actually knows and has had a relationship with already. you don't know what their agreement is and if he/they are not open about it....they may not intend to stay married forever. and that's their business.
helping her not get send back where she came from (if that's not what she wanted or was unsafe for her) is the least he could do if she was already his girlfriend for a while and he didn't already decide to marry her till death.