Quick way to vet: nail down concrete plans. Make him chase and do nothing. Have very realistic expectations and state them. Set a small goal that’s concrete and expect it to be met. Then set a few more. Keep making concrete plans. If he can’t or won’t comply or follow through, that’s your answer: he won’t because he can’t.
i told a guy that the next time we went out, i wanted to only meet in the daytime because when we first met, it was for dinner and i'm more of a day person. he gave (justifiable) reasons why he wouldn't be able to meet me the next weekend, then still suggested dinner plans for throughout the week or that i would have to wait. i said sure i could wait, then he didn't reply.
I’d say immediately a proper dinner date or something else that proves he listens and takes your preferences into account. Museum date, which needs a decision on place, time, date, meet up location. Or saying you need specific help picking out a new appliance. Make it to where he has to show up, keep his word, and something that requires ongoing convo and feedback.
One thing that I have never seen a genuine man do is make comments about someone being their ‘wifey’ talk about marriage or kids in a cutesy way And not be a total psychopath. I’ve seen a genuine man ask if I want to be married and have kids in the future but any of the cutesy joking about relationship, pregnancy, babies, marriage, run away the man is a narc.
This. The only time a man is serious about marriage is when he has a ring in hand and is on one knee. I’ve lost count of the number of men that have told me they want to marry me and/ or have their children. It’s very cruel future faking in that it can derail a woman’s life and it is a hallmark of a future faker/ nefarious 🤡. If a man is serious about this, he will broach the subject delicately.
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Quick way to vet: nail down concrete plans. Make him chase and do nothing. Have very realistic expectations and state them. Set a small goal that’s concrete and expect it to be met. Then set a few more. Keep making concrete plans. If he can’t or won’t comply or follow through, that’s your answer: he won’t because he can’t.
One thing that I have never seen a genuine man do is make comments about someone being their ‘wifey’ talk about marriage or kids in a cutesy way And not be a total psychopath. I’ve seen a genuine man ask if I want to be married and have kids in the future but any of the cutesy joking about relationship, pregnancy, babies, marriage, run away the man is a narc.
Love bombing is the worst. Especially when you actually like a guy and he doesn't need to be doing that, and you can see right through it, but uhg.