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I’m quite new to Fds and have been reading alot on the forum and reddit. I think I’ve probably read almost all the posts And handbook.
I’m still trying to process it all but I saw a couple of points about coercion being rape / assault.
I’m actually crying thinking about this because I’ve always been someone who wasn’t open to having sex with just any guy I got with unless I was dating but for some reason I have ended up having sex with a lot of guys and I recently started feeling very bad and terrible that I actually slept with all these men and none of them ended up in a real relationship, it was always having sex in hopes of getting into a relationship or them liking me. But it all makes sense how I actually ended up having sex with these men, thinking about it 90% of all of them were coercion, being convinced, some were even them holding me down and me just giving up and thinking I like them and maybe they are really attracted to me or convincing me how they are already aroused and I was too. I ’d end up giving in and always blaming myself.
But it makes sense now because I never really wanted and I would always say no I wasn’t ready or didn’t want sex but was convinced or made feel like I wasn’t cool and I thought giving in would get me benefits ( a relationship ) .
This has pretty much been my story when it comes to dating ever since, though not all were like this, sometimes I did want it .
Here I am now feeling so terrible for giving myself to all these men. I feel dirty but I actually understand better now and I should never let someone convince or trick me into sex.
I’ve also gone celibate now but it still stings
Things scrotes do to get laid with no regard to ethics and morals are astonishing . They do 'romantic overture' to distract you and consider it normal to use coercion, gaslighting and other arsenal of PUA tactics to get sex and no wonder women feel used and bad afterwards. Manipulating their way all the time they do mental gymnastics to explain why disregarding LMR (last minute resistance) is totally ok. If anything positive can be pointed out for your experience is that those scrotes are not orbiting near you now! Keep on your leveling up sis and don't look back, since you were in no fault but being naïve as society conditioned us to be.
I understand how you feel. This topic fucked with my head for a really long time. There is nothing wrong with you for doing what you did. Society everywhere grooms women constantly to do what males want them to do. It's simply impossible to escape, and even if you do you pay some sort of price. Take comfort in the fact that now you know better and you can make real choices.
Emotional and physical abuse happens to too many women. I fear for younger women all the time who are less experienced in manipulation and abuse tactics. There should be laws to stop these crimes but emotional abuse is not recognised in courts. I'm sorry your life was robbed from you by frauds and abusers. Women need to fight back together. Men need to fix the problems they made not women.
My advice to young women would be: never be alone with a man. Ever. If you know, you know.