My dad is a huge control freak and it’s eating me alive. Anyone else have this problem?

My dad got upset that I wanted leftovers because apparently the type of food we had last night doesn't heat up well and can result in food poisoning.

I told him I was having the leftovers and he got upset and said you “can’t reheat it” even tho my mom was totally chill with me having it today. I’ve had this food for leftovers before and been totally fine. I told him that and he eventually just sighed and said “fine do what you want but it causes food poisoning” etc.

This is just one out a million examples of him trying to control me and everyone else in the house. He drinks everyday which doesn’t help( he has a stressful job), and it takes a toll on him as well as everyone else in the family.

He thinks me, my mom, and my sisters are all against him and considers us ungrateful, and while I feel bad for him at times, he makes it really hard for me to sympathize because he’s insufferable 95% of the time.

He had a huge influence on my poor self-esteem growing up (same with my mom but at least she’s self aware) so that’s part of why I have a hard time sympathizing.

However I still feel super guilty because I wouldn’t be able to attend school or anything without his financial support. I’m autistic so that’s caused some delays for me in terms of financial independence.

I want to find a decent job and become financially independent as soon as possible. I can’t do this anymore.