You do things because you WANT to, NOT because you "have" to.

You cook the feast for your entire family every single day? -- because you WANT to, NOT because you "have" to.

You deep clean your entire house from top to bottom every 5 hours? -- because you WANT to, NOT because you "have" to.

You build your own deck and plant the entire lawn and erect your own fence? -- because you WANT to, NOT because you "have" to.

You fix your own car and do all the DIY stuff around the house? -- because you WANT to, NOT because you "have" to.

And etc, etc.

Get it?

It is not about 'turning' yourself into the archetype Evil Wife™ that treat your husband like a slave and push him down the stairs for insurance money and left your kids in the mysterious dark woods or some shit -- of course that's not you.

But you are definitely NOT the workhorse mule that do literally every single chores and cooking and paying the bills and taking care of the child ALONE and literally be the modern slave in your own damn home -- while that piece of sh*t just sit on his ass all day playing games, no?

While also maintaining the perfect sexy highschool figure and young look while also be ready and eager to perform the p*rnstar show for him in bed, no?

Realized that you have been brainwashed to believe that just to get into a relationship with a man, any man and to ensure he stays loyal to you -- you somehow have to be this [being] that are sky high perfect in every skills and great in every chores and never complain and make a lot of money and never tired and always down to work and fight for and kiss his feet and give him anything and everything -- for crumbs of affection.

To the extent that any suggestion that you should rest and do less than him for once -- you literally goes batshit crazy. You get mad at me for suggesting that YOU should rest more and let him do more -- because he is the man, he is built for it. He has all the muscle and the energy and the engine for it, you know?

Otherwise what use is he sitting on his ass all day doing nothing? You will end up complaining and being deeply resentful 5 years down the line anyway.

You worry that if you let him get tired once in a while -- that means he will get tired of you and run away -- so instead of letting him act like an adult for once -- you just do more and give more and torture yourself to be more beautiful and eat weird shit so you can pretend to be eager in bed.

Can you not see how stupid all these is?

Seriously, what are you doing to yourself? Is this how you want to live your life?

Because sorry to burst your bubble sis -- that imagination you have that "One day, he will see all the sacrifices I've made for him and realize I am the ONE" IS A F**KING LIEEEEEE. You have been brainwashed, groomed to believe that stupid ass bullsh*t.

It is a LIE.

A genuine, kind, fully mature, decent man who LOVES you will NEVER let you break yourself into near insanity like that, understand?

You won't even go through the whole shitshow of "martyr sacrificing for the family" because HE. WILL. NOT. LET. THAT. HAPPEN!

Understand the difference between a HVM and the rest of them.

HVMs are the only men you should pay attention to because they are the ones treating you like human and a WOMAN -- the rest should be kept at bay at all cost.

Because those scrotes will do anything in their power to destroy you. They are critically underdeveloped, stunted, having whole ass toxic problems that you should never, ever associate with -- because he will destroy you just to make himself feel better for 5 minutes.

That's why you were driven to near insanity after dealing with those scrotes -- because you have been dealing with people who don't see you as human! And are intent on destroying every single fiber of your being!

So stop endangering yourself and being so careless with your safety -- and start walking away immediately!

Cut him off the SECOND he starts showing his true color.

You need a lot of rest, especially as you grow older.

You may think you are the bullet train running on endless power supply -- and you will stay this strong and healthy and unstoppable 10 years in, 20 years in;

But if you keep doing what you are doing right now -- overtaxing and overburdening yourself like crazy every single day -- 5 years, hell maybe 3 years in you will burned TF out and break to pieces.

Did you not realize that EXTREME STRESS is the number one reason of so many mental and physical diseases and health complications in women?

Where do you think that extreme amount of stress comes from?

Sure, if you are still in the young boyfriend-girlfriend chatting every night and go in cute dates every sunday; there will be no stress -- but the instant you start living together?

And there are chores?

There are laundry?

There are bills and gas and finance to worry about?

There are a house to clean and pipes to unclog and lawn to maintain?

There are bed to be made and sofa to dust and carpet to clean from endless "mysterious" stain?

Once the REALITY smack you right in the face and the joke he has been telling you isn't so funny anymore?

And in the chaos of it all, your MONTHLY MANDATORY REST PERIOD comes?

And further down the road, the pregnancy, the morning sickness, the birth, the children?

Do you really think you are this [being] that are so powerful and tireless and can keep going forever and ever and ever -- you are "above" all the realities of life and aging?

Because I was once that arrogant (code: deeply insecure) young woman that think I can keep going and doing it all and nothing can stop me -- and not even 4 years later, get the burnout of the f**king century.

And then covid came and I get the long covid symptom to this day.

I was humbled to the ground, sis.

I speak from personal experience and not out of my ass, sis.

I was arrogant and learned TF out of my lesson, and I am glad I get it early while I was still free, unmarried, no children to worry about.

But what happens when you crashed and burned after a DECADE of relationship? When you are smack-dab in the middle of everything and you can't just give up and leave?

I am NOT an inexhaustible, robot-like [being] that should do everything by herself and can keep going on and on and on and will NEVER breakdown. And should NEVER accept help, because accepting help are for those "weak girls".

And so do you.

There's a reason why you are born with the biological need to MANDATORILY REST every month.

You are not born with the continuous working energy -- men are.

You are born with the creative energy that ebbs and flows with your mental, emotional, and physical state.

That's why the kind of man that will treat you not only like a human, but genuinely like a WOMAN -- will let you do whatever you want, feel whatever you want, be in whatever mood you are -- and provides you the space to ebbs and flows as you need to be.

While he will be the constant that handles all the mind-numbing routine and exhausting chores and stressful nitty-gritty details. Because he is built for it -- and he enjoys that aspect of him very well.

Because his male pride is filled to the brim everyday, watching you flourish and happy and content and restful under his care.

You should stop thinking and projecting your exhaustion and stress on the man -- thinking that the man will experience it exactly like you do when dealing with the workload -- so you start having this misplaced pity and thinking that you should "lessen" his burden.

And start getting unnecessarily stressed because your way of doing things might not match his way of doing things -- and something as simple as how to fold the sock can turn into something way wayy bigger down the line.

That's why you should just keep doing the things you WANT to do, and not because you HAVE to.

Because the HAVE tos are HIS responsibility and you let him do it -- the hardest thing you may have to do, once you enter a relationship with a man is to fully LET GO of the wheel -- and let him do it.

You stick with what you WANT to do -- not what you are expected to do, or "woman's chores", or from the desperate need to show him that you are still "useful" etc2.

If one day you no longer WANT to do that thing? He will smoothly comes in and take over like it is just another Tuesday.

And try to believe me when I say that a genuine HVM LOVE to take care of you. Because that's the easiest way to show you the proof of his love, every single day.

And in the similar vein, he will never put it above your head, the fact that he paid the bills and all that stuff -- because he doesn't see it as a burden -- he sees it as an act of love.

He loves you by being responsible towards you. And his happiness comes from seeing you being happy, healthy, content, safe, and secure under his care.

So if you worry about being "controlled" once you let go of the wheel -- know that those "fathers" and "men you knew" are not HVMs, they are a giant pile of smelly turd. Rich or not, turd is turd.

So VET. And know when to WALK AWAY.

Stay safe, stay WOMAN.