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Society taught us women that it's your dream day, where you marry your prince charming. And after seeing how many lvm are out there, finding one worthy of marrying (that you didn't have to chase or beg) is definitely something to celebrate and enjoy. But we need to make some things very clear in regards to weddings.
- if your wedding is giving you high levels of stress then you need to take a step back. No wedding or scrote should be causing you that much stress.
- remember that your fiance should be planning the wedding WITH you. I see so many brides complaining and stressing as they try to plan their own wedding while the scrote acts like a bump on a log, just nodding along "whatever you want hunny", whilst he makes no actual effort to find venues or look around for a photographer. He should be making actual efforts as it is not fair for the bride to overwhelm herself by doing it all.
You can also hire professional wedding planners! You can also recruit the help of your family or the bridal party. I'm tired of seeing bump on a log scrotes being toted around like a puppy dog while the woman exhausts herself doing all the work.
- there's a lot of pressure from society that your wedding day be this massively expensive and luxurious event. On the other hand, theres a ton of pressure for the opposite extreme saying that it's okay to have the cheapest wedding possible in a fire hall, back yard, or to just skip the wedding and have it at a courthouse. I'm here to remind FDSers that your wedding is YOUR day, cast aside what society says and to look at what you genuinely want and what your budget is. If you can afford something more lavish, then don't let a cheap scrote talk you our of it and don't shamed if you have to settle for the backyard special because you shouldn't go into heaps of debt.
- remember if your fiance is acting like a scrote that he ASKED YOU to marry him. If hes complaining, disinterested, and acting miserable leading up to the wedding then dont be the pickme who drags him to the altar. You can call it off. "But I'll loose the deposit / but we already ordered the cake / my dress can't be returned" stop making excuses. It's the sunk cost fallacy.
-some men will seem high value and then around the wedding they'll get weird. Is he flirting with one of the bridesmaids? Did he fool around with a bridesmaid before the wedding? Call it off. There's nothing for you to be ashamed of. Tell people "I called the wedding off because he ...". No, he didn't get "cold feet".
-he shouldn't be scoffing at the prices.
-if there's some people that you don't want to invite, he will respect that and say okay. He isn't gonna try to change your mind, guilt trip you, or invite them anyways.
We always say if he wanted to, he would. A man that genuinely wants to marry you will be considerate to what you want on the wedding day and he will actively be helping plan his own wedding. He will be genuinely interested and excited for his wedding day because he can't wait to marry you. He won't let you get so stressed or overwhelmed. He'll step up and have his family help or recruit his friends to help out because he won't to see the woman he loves struggling.
- Remember that you can CALL OFF THE WEDDING. There is still time to get out if he starts acting like a scote. I've seen women call it off and die the dress and do funny photo shoots in it instead. I've seen the would have been bride take herself on the honeymoon when she couldn't get a refund. I've seen her show up to the venue with her best friends instead to party together that she dodged a bullet. I've even see the would have been bride give away the venue reservation for a deep deep discount to others. You don't have to do any of that but it's suggestions. My point is calling off the wedding isn't a taboo. Don't believe the sunk cost fallacy.
Damn yea he should be nothing less than excited to marry his dream partner or what is the point?
those wedding cake toppers where the lady is dragging the man to the altar really make me cringe.
I'd rather elope and use the money for a honeymoon and a house.
Also, I'm introverted and don't like being the center of attention. The thought of walking down the aisle with everyone looking freaks me out. I don't care if it's people I know.
More women need to see and learn from this post. Especially young women.
On my wedding day, the photographer kept telling me I needed to smile, that I looked nervous. I couldn't smile. By the time I got the wedding planned I realized I didn't want to be married to him. I felt trapped by the actual wedding, the family, the expense, etc. It was awful.
I was married once so I wouldn’t waste money and stress over a big wedding. If I were to get married again, I want a nice celebration with my closest loved ones at a very fine dining restaurant that has a pianist and I wear a beautiful dress. Then I want to go on a honeymoon for a month or two ☺️
Sunk cost fallacy: I think I need more on this because it may be how I’ve been living.
This reminds me of that one viral video titled something like ”his girlfriend took on a second job to pay for their wedding” and I think in the video he goes to the restaurant brings her flowers and Starbucks and leaves her a $20 tip… and then he films her face the whole time she’s working like 😡 Just so rude. It masks the fact that she had to serve and clean up after him. And more importantly, he took the space of a table who could’ve brought in said money for their wedding that he spent to “treat“ her.
I can see how on the surface this looks “aww“ and “cute” depending on where you are in your pickme stage, but if you have to take on a second job and struggle for that wedding he ain‘t it!
What if one person wants a really cheap one and doesn't see the point in big parties, and one person wants a more traditional one? Or if one person wants to elope or whatever?
I’ve been married before and we did a really small cheaper wedding and then took a longer honeymoon. We had been living together for a bit so just asked guests for money for wedding gifts and it covered pretty much our entire wedding and honeymoon.
If I got married again I would just elope and do the long honeymoon again. I’ve always hated weddings and found the planning to be annoying and time consuming just for the wedding to be over in a night. The wedding industry is also overpriced as hell.