The importance of reading between the lines

I am never again going to see "chill" and "relaxed" as anything but a lazy cop-out for actual effort. I recently posted about my disappointment with a friend and how she accepted a no effort proposal on the couch. She claims to like him because he is "chill", his whole personality is a pot smoking turtle, staring off into the distance. As far as I can see, he adds nothing. We had dinner parties where he was perfectly content to sit on his ass while she is running around cleaning and catering for him. What happened to the strong, independent woman that picked me out of some scrotes ashes and told me I deserved better?

Kinda suprised this lazy guy had oneday the energy to look up what type-a personalities are…

And if you don't put the emotional work in I will dump you because I need someone to plan my life and my adventures for me.

1. "Couldn't care less"🙄🙄🙄🙄 cornball 2. Talking about ex gf🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 corrrnnnnballlll 3. "gOiNg WiTh tHe FlOw"🤓 cornball and wonder why your last relationship didn't work out because "not proactive" 4. 50/50 CORNBALL CRINGE EW I'm glad you blocked this thing because he got on my nerves and idek him lmao

Is this him saying he wants to be 6 years old? In what way would this nonsense be desirable?

Yikes

Aww... he wants to play the little sleepy coquette who never lifts a finger in the relationship and hopes some Boss Babe comes in to carry all the responsibilities on her shoulders while he sits pretty. Foh. 😒

"last gf was amazing but she was also easygoing and we didn't do anything since we both weren't proactive because i can't be fucked to care; that's the woman's job".

I like how his last GF played him.

“I don’t care what we do” is a lie. If so, he wouldn’t have broken up with his last gf. He does care, he just doesn’t want to be the one that initiates.

And if it’s a need, you can’t and shouldn’t go 50/50 on it. A need is something you need in a relationship for it to be worthwhile.

Yeah this is tricky for sure. I can empathize with some parts of it, because I'm fairly "low key" myself in some ways, and I don't care about "external" things (material possessions, career, etc.) as much as several other people I know. However(!), I know that sometimes this carefree attitude is also a double edged sword and can stem from a lack of ambition or self-esteem. Why bother with goals when you can be disappointed anyway, right? Better be content with less. There is some merit in being able to create happiness and contentment for yourself even if you're not killing it in every aspect of your life. "If you think happiness is somewhere else, it will never be where you are" and all that. Then again, most men I've met who describe themselves as easy going and chill are just way too okay with doing absolutely nothing. And I do feel a small amount of "unhappiness" is useful in life because it drives us to improve, and we need a little bit of constant improvement to offset the natural decay that's happening to us all (and everything we own or have learned, for that matter). What I'm trying to say is that I do agree with other commenters who have said that complete polarity (super chill and super ambitious) will probably not match well, but I can imagine an ideal situation where you can push each other if needed but also remind each other to relax and smell the flowers if needed.