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Hi ladies, here is another old FDS post from my Reddit account last Christmas.
The truth is that most marriages are miserable for WOMEN because most men are negative value/ low value.
Society programs/ brainwashes/ gaslights and in some parts of the world even forces women to settle. The world we live in really underestimates the stress and trauma that LVM and NVM cause their wives/partners and children. The realisation that most women are utterly miserable in their marriages really hit me this holiday season. Literally almost every single friend and family member of mine are married to negative value men. Some female friends are in such terrible, abusive marriages, that this holiday season, a couple of them have admitted that their children are the only reason they have not unalived themselves. I found this absolutely terrifying and disturbing. All of these same friends have rejected FDS but that's a story for another post. If you took one look at a certain sub, (Breaking mom) you'd see a multitude of gut wrenching holiday horror stories from wives with children. The common denominator of all their holiday misery was their NV husbands.This holiday season, I've truly come to realise that most men hate their wives. They don't see them as actual human beings with feelings. These women are just their slaves to clean up after them, feed them, £*ck them and raise their children. I only saw one positive post where a husband was praised for doing the bare minimum. One woman said being around her husband gives her migraines. Whenever he's gone she's fine and has no migraines. She dreads spending time with him because it's like being around a large toddler/teenager who she would always have to manage. Another had a nasty indifferent old grump of a husband that made her cry herself to sleep for Christmas. Another woman went to multiple international stores just trying to get her husband a specific holiday gift that he was talking about since October. At midnight this twit of a husband goes to the dollar store and fills her stocking with cheap garbage that she doesn't even like in the first place. It seemed like he just picked the first assortment of junk he saw. There were also lots of stories of husbands ruining Christmas for the children. Marriage is sold to women as the happiest thing in the world. It's the ultimate success to get married and breed as a woman. The white dress fantasy, beautiful wedding decor, happiness, diamond ring, spending the rest of your life with the love of your life, having 2 children and a white picket fence. This is society's way of telling women that getting picked is the best thing that could ever happen to us, it's supposedly something that will make us incredibly happy. What a lie. Simultaneously boys are sold porn fantasies of degrading and dehumanising women. In fact, men are taught to fear and be repulsed by commitment and weddings. They're told to sleep with as many women as they can. The result is idealistic, love struck women loving men who actually hate them and only see women as objects to degrade for status and enjoyment instead of human beings with feelings. And the most devastating result of this lie sold to us, is that women project their love, empathy, and morality onto men. It's probably why it's so hard to leave. They think that men actually have the same level of humanity and regard for them. They think that if they beg, communicate and explain till they're blue in the face, he will uDeRsTaND and see my humanity and pain 🤡 If marriage is so glorious why are the majority of married women so utterly miserable, hurt and exhausted? Why are there so many studies that show married women are the unhappiest demographic and don't live as long as single women? The reverse is true for married men. I've only ever seen 2 happy marriages my entire life. I think most single women long for a relationship only because they are told that they can't be happy without marriage and kids. When in fact the opposite is true with how depraved the males of today are. From childhood, women are brainwashed to waste time fantasizing about relationships, marriage, and the fantasy of being rescued by a handsome Prince. It's literally all we're taught to think about. Boys are taught to seek adventure and thrills like racecars, mortocyles, etc. They're taught to seek exciting hobbies, financial knowledge success, self empowerment, etc. Marriage is the last thing on their minds. Most marriages are miserable for women because most men are negative value. The marriage lie perpetuated by society reminds me of George Orwell's book, 1984. Or back when cigarettes were marketed as having no adverse effects on your health. It's a lie. Men and society need to lie because no sane women would ever marry men and trap themselves in a life of misery if they really knew the truth. The truth hurts for some time but ultimately sets you free. Applying FDS principles will save you a life wasted in misery centred around men. Decentre men from your lives. If you don't meet a HVM and want children, you have modern technology on your side. Get financially stable and plan for life as a single mother rather than settle. You and your child will be happier for it. VET forever and stay ready to leave at the drop of a hat.
The way girls are raised to be wives and mothers and to work hard in a relationship, be faithful, that there’s a good man who wants to marry you, etc. is diametrically opposed to way that boys are raised to see and use women as mobile sperm toilets. And this disparity has only gotten worse as more porn and hookup culture has progressed. I know my female relatives tried to warn me about men, but when I was a young girl, I just couldn’t fathom how males really are. I couldn’t understand that the love and care I have in my heart towards them isn’t what the feel at all. I didn’t realize that they were just mimicking and faking loving emotions IOT trap me and to get what they wanted. My own father told me about 20 years ago, “The problem with women is that you have all of these emotions, but we men feel NOTHING.“ I wrote that off as “not all men” to my detriment. The longer I’ve lived and the more experienced I’ve become with males, the more it leans towards ALL MEN. Me giving men the benefit of the doubt has resulted in nothing but heartbreak and devastation for me.
"If marriage is so glorious why are the majority of married women so utterly miserable, hurt and exhausted? Why are there so many studies that show married women are the unhappiest demographic and don't live as long as single women?"
**Standing ovation**
I'm often out alone socially, and after older women get a few drinks in them, you would not believe how many come up and grab my arm to tell me I've got the perfect life because I'm single and don't have kids. They whisper to me I'm doing the right thing and they wish they had done it too. Amen.
I'll never forget a particular scrote at my kids' little league game. He was on the phone complaining about his wife, how he hates her, he can't wait to leave her. She showed up and he got off the phone. He wasn't lovey dovey- he was pretty stand-offish, but you could tell she wasn't picking up on it (or if anything, it was making her pick-me dance even more). Then she had to leave early, and he got back on the phone to complain about her. He even said "There are so many MILFs at this game, I don't know what I'm doing with this awful woman". LOL! As if any of the "MILFs" would give his fat, bald self a chance. It is SO gross how so many men hate and resent their wives, but will still stay with them and gaslight them. I'm sure that poor woman had asked him many times why he was acting the way he did, and he just denied it and made her feel paranoid.
On the topics of holidays, it also makes me think about how not only do women do 99.99999% of the planning, preparation, and execution for all of the holidays, but to take it a step further, some LV/ NVM will have the AUDACITY to complain about all the work his partner is doing.
"Do we really need all these decorations?"
"Why do we have to go to this party?"
"It's not like you didn't know company was coming over" (when it's HIS family coming over)
So not only do they NOT help out whatsoever, but they take the opportunity to whine complain and act like a moody teenager while they're at it.
I absolutely ADORE @thatdarnchat on TikTok and her work on unequal domestic labor. When a scrote complained about his wife "dragging" him to take a family portrait she said,
"Don't go. Then you can explain to friends and family why you aren't in your own family portrait. Think of it as a divorce soft launch."
Just... *chef's kiss*
i’m vehemently childfree and this helps weed out the scrotes but I’m also so weary of marriage.
it truly is a scam for most women and a straight up life ruining horror. also the amount of married men even with kids who will check out women in public or do worse. I openly gag or glare at them
Yep. I'm increasingly told by married women that I'm lucky to be single and to keep it that way. I was previously told that only after I had known them for some time, now I'm being told that within the first time I mention I'm single. I frequently hear men complain about their wives, but seem to forget they were the ones who proposed. My parents are still married, but when you get them on their own, they will both openly admit they wished they married other people. Growing up, my mother was fiercely adamant that I not marry the first man that comes along. It was her way of saying don't end up like me. My ex partner had a few friends who were intending to leave their wives or long term girlfriends, but were waiting until she reached her late 30s so she wouldn't have enough time left to meet someone else and have children (so their mental energy was simultaneously future faking her and planning an exit - so screwed up). The daily news stories of men attacking and assaulting their wives physically repulses me. There was that awful story of a woman in the UK whose partner raped her *while she was in labor*. The depths to which men want to hurt us has no end. While I sometimes am deeply saddened by being single and childless not by choice, I am grateful every single day that I have never been in any of these situations.
I always knew from single digits that I very much wanted to be married and happy, hence doing it twice and second time was the charm. Also knew from single digits that I never wanted kids. My bullshit radar went off in single digits because back then in the 70s/80s, nothing negative could be said about parenthood and yet all I saw were tired, stressed mothers and checked-out fathers. I always believed what I saw. I found out just how conditional social approval was. So much approval for getting married; so much disapproval for refusing to have kids. I’d often troll the most pro-natal by being even more childfree than I actually felt because there was no other way to get them to back down and back off. It was some serious coercion by random people who didn’t even know me. (Fortunately zero pressure from family!) Then in my 30s I found out what mirroring was and how it upsets insecure people when you choose differently and don’t validate their choice. Irrationality explained! These days as most of you know, I’m 50+ and widowed. Zero desire to marry a third time. Mild desire for male companionship but only passively on OLD. Surrounded by family, friends, community. Have my own house, worked and invested so I hope to build my forever house soon, and am lucky to have my needs met and then some. All this to say it was my first marriage in my 20s that hit all the lows. I woke up from being a pickme, centered myself, leveled up, found Jack, moved, married, and kept leveling up. Can't tell you ladies how blessed and privileged I feel. That said, good men are out there. They exist. You'll just need to weed out a hell of a lot and vet ruthlessly. You're worth it.
Marriage benefits men which is why the patriarchy sells us these lies. It’s a complete bait and switch and manipulation. And women who defy the patriarchy… say a woman who just wants to live in the woods by herself with her cats…would get
burned alive a few hundred years ago in the US. Women who defy the patriarchy are getting murdered in Iran right now as we speak.
And we are going backwards. Women who don’t believe the lies get punished. That you can believe.
This is facts on facts on facts on facts. We're all very very lucky to have founds FDS before it was too late.
What are we to do to protect ourselves if we do want marriage and kids?
I remember reading this on the reddit fds, it was one of my favorite posts! I shared it with a couple of friends. Thanks for posting.
There has to be some men that are quality, so if we do get married it should only be if it will makes us incredibly happy right? Maybe it’s statistically unlikely, but we can always choose to stop or resume dating whenever. You are right though modern gender relations is in the dumpster.