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When I found this place I was running my way into yet another shitty relationship. I told myself, though, it was gonna be the last one.
I *practiced* FDS with a guy I actually really liked and seemed high value in paper. FDS isn’t the handbook, the rules aren’t going to make you high value or know high value, it’s the IDEA.
At the end of the day no one knows what will happen the next day. What everyone does is place “bets” on what will happen tomorrow. This guy that you met yesterday, would you put money down and say he’s going to text you tomorrow? No. Do you want him to text you tomorrow? Yes. Your interests aren’t aligned, block and leave.
No one will ever try to love you for you. No one will try for you. Humans work by incentives, not by wants. View your potential next mate as a bet. Make that bet with YOURSELF every night. And if the odds *feel* against you, it’s because they are.
You can have all the vetting tricks in the handbook, but how do you know you found your HVM? Make a bet. What does your gut say? Your gut is your gut because it always just knows when something is right or wrong.
It’s not the money, it’s not the first date, it’s not what he does. You’re looking for someone whose interests are aligned with yours so things work smoothly. No one should ever change to be with who they love.
Quit trying to find the solution. There isn’t one. The only solution is to know your gut when everything is said and done is the only one who will advocate for YOU. What YOU need to do, is to find yourself.
Take off the female socialization. Who are you? Have enough compassion for yourself to get to know yourself. If you don’t figure that part out, nothing else will ever make sense. You will be vulnerable forever to end up in horrid situations because you never *trusted* yourself.
FDS in one sentence is trusting yourself enough to know that when you see a HVM, you’ll know.
Keep doing what you’re doing. Keep being you. Thats the only thing you can control. The rest is confetti.