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I can’t decide because I really like him. We started dating almost three months ago. I know I should probably break up but I’m the kind of person who just does better in a relationship and I just need someone to cuddle with so I can feel like life is worth the effort.
Pros:
buys me flowers on a regular basis
almost always gets the bill (unless I’m the one who made the plans)
does things when I ask
🍆
compliments
makes me feel motivated
makes sure I eat enough
makes more money than I do
Cons:
doesn’t wash the dishes correctly
smells bad, especially his clothes
rotting teeth (he’s going to the dentist but I don’t think he was going to if I didn’t threaten to break up with him)
paranoid
doesn’t make a lot of money
doesn’t have a car
wants me to tell him how to plan our dates
I guess it’s mostly clear that I should break up with him, but I also want to stay to make sure he goes to the dentist. I’ve always wanted kids and I’m at the age where I have to face that I’ll probably miss that chance, so I think part of me wants someone to take care of instead of an actual partner. Does that mean I should stay?
I don't even had to read that. Yes. If you need to go to the internets and ask this, then yes, dump him. In your heart you know you should.
If you're thinking you need kids right now and THAT man looks like a suitable partner... just go to a sperm bank. Single motherhood is cheaper, easier, and safer than having a baby plus a man baby. That man will only make your life worse, especially when a baby gets factored in. Here's to hoping you don't get trapped...
Break up with him. He does things when you ask, but you shouldn't have to ask him. He doesn't take initiative for your dates. Any man can buy flowers and pay for meals. He doesn't take care of his hygiene and health. I promise you, if you start doing it for him, it will be your responsibility forever. Men don't respect women who treat them like a baby, even though they want that. He will just become lazier and lazier in your relationship until all he does is sit on his unwashed ass 24/7, with dirty dishes piled around him. You're only 3 months in. This should be your honeymoon phase and he should be going to the ends of the Earth to impress you. But he's not. Take it from someone who has had this exact same experience. GET OUT NOW!! Actual good men are out there, and being alone now is better than being with him.
Drop him. He is not fit for reproduction. Plus he's infecting your mouth with his caries bacteria ☹️
This man doesn’t really sound mature enough for a relationship. He will do things when you ask him to.. but not actually do the mental labor of noticing that things need to get done, or planning ahead for things that would make you happy. You’re already doing all the heavy lifting in the relationship, and you’ve only been together for a few months. This is the time when he should be doing everything he can to impress you - but instead, you are having to arrange his basic healthcare?
Sorry to put it this way but.. girl, what are you doing???
This reminds me of the shitty man I wasted my time on when I was 22. I wish I’d listened when people told me to dump him at the beginning.
Do yourself a favor and drop him immediately. You are not his mother, don’t parent for him.
If you want a child very badly, consider saving up to freeze your eggs. That way, you can wait until you have an actual partner to help you raise your kids in meaningful ways. It’s blatantly obvious that this man would just be sitting on his ass and whining that you don’t give him attention anymore now that the baby’s around. He’s beyond useless, he will suck all the joy and personal agency out of your life.
Get out now, while it’s easy to untangle yourself from him.
You mention that you want someone to take care of you. This man cannot do that because he's a man-child who wants you to take care of him. He is a grown man (allegedly) and he won't take care of his own teeth. Also you mention that he doesn't make a lot of money so he's not going to take care of you financially either. Frankly this man sounds like he'll be nothing but a drain. Get rid of him!
The teeth...🤮🤮🤮
Use him while you build your life and be open for better men. Otherwise you're degrading yourself being with someone who can't wash dishes..