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I'm inexperienced in dating and I'm in my mid 20's.
My most recent Ex (I've only had two boyfriends in my life), his dad abandoned the family and so he was raised by his mom and aunt. He has two sisters and that's it. He told me: I was raised by women so I know how to treat them.
I was very naive, but I thought it was a nice breath of fresh air that I was dating a man who was only raised by women.
He was great in the beginning. Though looking back, I can see where I ignored my gut feeling about certain things he would say.... and I ignored that I felt uncomfortable with his Instagram habits. But hey, he said he respects women 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡
Yes he did not hit me but wow the manipulation, gaslighting, AND LIES were insane!!
Even if a man was raised by only women, that does NOT mean you can relax and "trust" that he knows how to treat a woman because he was born and raised in an all women environment.
I feel like the men who say that they respect women, are usually the ones who emotionally and mentally abuse or just do the bare minimum.
Just like Lauryn Hill says, "respect is the minimum"
Also, I learned that these men tend to put their woman family members first. We were together about a year and a half. He said he sends money to his sister who has a fiancé to help pay for her house. He said it's newly constructed and built from their own plan and her and her man can't afford it. Also, his mom lives with him for two weeks per month and he said he doesn't want to move, because then his mom will be homeless. At first I thought "oh wow he loves his family" but when you really think about it.... he is still so tied to them and isn't ready to have a wife. Unless the wife wants all that..... but anyways:
Dude youre 26 and you're telling me you want a future with me yet you are still so tied to your female family members where you struggle with your own bills to send money to your sister who has three kids and a fiancé.. I thought it was super sweet at first until he put his MOM first over living together at a location we both wanted. He said that I should care about his mom if we will be married. Like of course I care about her but ..... you're a man... you are supposed to eventually "leave" to be with your wife.... Also, am I being mean about the sister? Why is the baby brother of the family sending money to the sister who has a family of her own. He struggles with his own rent. Is that sweet? Or is that weird?
Moral of the story: guys who come out and say that they respect all women and were raised by only women so they know what to do, they have a high chance of being very dangerous with your mind and heart and will most likely give you heartbreak. Proceed with caution or don't even proceed.
"Raised by women" can also mean that a man grew up in a fatherless home and may, as a result, have some weird resentment/cruelty complex toward women- thinking their women family members pushed their father away, unable to communicate and stand up to other men in a healthy way, etc.
Men with absent or abusive fathers are usually the most messed up men.
Sometimes men who were raised by women are used to being coddled by women and expect their wife/girlfriend to also coddle them. It's also worth pointing out that these men often lack a male role model. I'm not saying don't date these guys, I'm just saying that you shouldn't automatically assume a man is a HVM if he was raised by women.
Yeah the proclaiming "I was raised by women so I know how to treat them" is the unquestionable red flag.
The actual situation of having a scrote for a dad I think just needs to be investigated more.
My partner's dad won at scrote bingo: cheated on first wife with his mom, his mom was his dad's student in college, left her when he was 2, went on a journey around multiple states just picking up new wives having kids and moving on, also was an alcoholic.
The funny thing was all the ex wives were friendly, and all my boyfriends siblings/half siblings are sisters. So he was raised by women, he just never has proclaimed that makes him "better". Just has a deep distrust of men, takes care of his mom an appropriate amount, goes out of his way to be flexible with employees who are single moms and does decent stuff like put them on insurance even if they can only manage part time hours, and does stuff with a few local big brother-esque places to make sure other kids with crap fathers have some interaction with a decent man.
I agree 100%.
In the U.S., men who were "raised by all women" are some of the biggest red flags out there. Single motherhood, father absenteeism, mommaboyism, and generational trauma up the wazoo. Most likely, generational poverty is involved, too.
Denying these facts is ludicrous. I'm surprised this is even a matter of debate in the Western world.
If a man has to say that he "knows how to treat women", RUN. If he actually knew how to treat women, he wouldn't have to say it out loud, his actions would show it. Geez.
Edit: Oh and OP, that sounds like a horrible experience. Hope you're doing better.
My uncle (my mother's bro) was the only man in her family when her father died. All of his sisters ended up successful or married and all it did was make him very resentful, totally withdrawn and unable to connect with others. He was my grandmother's favorite and was still connected at the umbilical cord. Just because a man is the only man in his all female family doesn't mean JACK SHIT. VET THEM HARDER. they have not learned how to be men from other men and are very jealous of their female family members usually.
The fact that he told you that himself and in what is coming across as too confidently rings an alarm bell. It's as if he has something to prove, and he wants to create an impression that's gonna turn out not to be real eventually.