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I’ve been having a rough time lately, particularly with male friends, and it has led to this realization.
To summarize my experiences: I’m a friendly person who loves making friends. I don’t have any issues with women, but I find a lot of the time with men they're attracted to me, and if I don’t reciprocate they become uninterested in any form of friendship.
It led me to the realization that most men categorize women into two main categories, both of which have subcategories:
1.FUCKABLE
1a. Dateable: the “ideal“ category in their eyes because you can progress to girlfriend or wife. I’m reluctant to say theyll respect you because as we know, tons of men still cheat on their partners.
1b. Undateable: hookup/fling material. They will also take any opportunity to use you for food, money, resources etc.
1c. Ignore: the category I’m placed in. I reject their advances so they don’t want to be friends. Undateables can also be placed here once they deem you as “crazy”. This category also includes women who intimidate them that are out their league, and can’t be manipulated.
2.UNFUCKABLE
2a. Usable: a horrible place to be because even though you’re undesirable, you’re of use to them. This could range from a girl they lead on to receive favours (like homework), or an older woman that can be used as a mother figure.
2b. Useless: you’re neither desirable nor useful. They don’t want anything to do with you, and will either ignore or treat you harshly.
The bottom line is men have a self centred view of women and treat you according to utility. Be cautious and stay aware.
1a 1b and 1c are very often the same woman. Ask any of the other 'experienced' girls on here. Once you're 1a. "The girlfriend", scrotes treat you like 1b. They stop taking you on dates and start using your body as a masturbation tool and also use you for financial/emotional/household labour. This is where the term mommy bang maid comes from. Later they may also start to 1c. Ignore you cause they no longer need to manipulate you to perform for them, at this stage they may also start flirting with other women or getting heavily into porn. You start to feel neglected and lonely in the relationship and in extreme cases eventually end up being treated like a 2a. or 2b. In my opinion the idea that all these categories are different is a mind trick to get women to believe that they are 100 responsible for the crappy treatment they get from men. Women start to think that: "Men use me for sex because I'm not tradwife material." "Men need to be able to manipulate me to accept me. I need to be more submissive to get a ring." That's what those categories come down to. It's just a way for men to convince women that they need to transform themselves into one dimensional characters in order to fit a role in the LVM play. A HVM wouldn't categorize women like this because he sees women as human beings and not as tools that are built to service different parts of his life.
This goes hand in hand with the Madonna - whore complex. Avoid men that describe women as "wife material" / "gf material" or "hook up material" and the like. No matter what category you're in, you are nothing more than an item to use! A decent man would simply date or not date you. No "she's for hookup, she's gf material" bullshit!
Remember this is all about them and not you. A man who cannot see a woman as a human being but a tool for his pleasure will always treat you subhuman no matter how attractive he finds you.
Living apart together again for the win. Weeds out most of this behavior. A man would have to like me for me, and he content on his own (as a competent housekeeper) and also just want companionship.
This is so true. I've come across so many guys like this. Literally 99% of the male 'friends' I've had dropped me as soon as they realised I didn't want to date them. Just goes to show how one dimensional, shallow and selfish they are. And then there are the guys who will flat out ignore and snub women they find unattractive. Seeing this sort of behaviour has really made me change my perspective. Nowadays I treat men like how they treat women unless they can prove to me that they're different. I feel like a HVM would see women as people and so wouldn't even have a dumb system of categories.
Yeah I've went through a mental breakdown, gained weight and shaved my head and men went from 1 to 2b. Instead of coming up to me to flirt and ask how my day was, they were legit cruel to me, cutting conversations short even before I finish my sentence. It was mind blowing how badly they treated me, then I changed jobs, dropped male friends and gave up on any interaction with men. I got over my issues and now same men reach out and give me compliments. I hate them.
And it’s all just so disgustingly shallow and transactional. It’s so self-centered and baby-ish, as in what’s in it for me? Spare me.
and just stop being friends with men. Periodt. Have nothing more than standard come and go, hello good bye types of interactions with them. Unless of course they are particularly useful to YOU, in which case you be whatever you consider professional, sociable, etc to forge that lucrative connection.
Well they get their dumb feelings hurt that they’re not good enough for you so they can’t bear to look at your or be in the same room as you bc you’re a reflection of their undesirability. A symbol of rejection and inferiority. Good. Let them skulk tf on and seethe.
Low value men see women this way.