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I was scrolling through Instagram and saw an ad for yet another dating app (why there are so many, is beyond me. The purpose, in the beginning, was great but with how toxic most men are, it's a waste of time making them and having women running to use them). I smiled to myself because it reminded me of something I've read many times over about what men think of women who use dating apps. To men, women on dating apps are desperate and easy. Men apparently feel this way because they feel that no woman with options will be on a dating app. They forget two things: 1) the men judging women are on the apps too so if women are desperate, what are the men? 2) women go onto dating apps because so many men that they meet offline are horrendous.
Seeing the ad made me think of other double standards that exist:
1) Men feel that women who sleep with them on the first date are easy and not to be respected. They feel that if a woman can sleep with them straight away then she must be like this with other men. Some men even think this way about a woman that kisses them, even if no sex is involved.
2) Women who sleep around are sluts but men who sleep around are manly and impressive.
3) Women who date multiple men are suspicious as they must be sleeping with all men but when a man dates multiple women and is even sleeping with all of them then it's just a case of "what men do".
4) When a woman shows her interest in a man, regardless of the timeline, the man may feel that she's too keen, desperate or easy and as a result of that, feels that it's OK to take advantage of her or ghost her but when men show interest in women, whether that interest is reciprocated or wanted and regardless of the timeline, then women must accept it and even, appreciate it and reciprocate it.
In all the scenarios, the men engage with the women but somehow, only women are guilty and looked down upon. Men feel that they are always exempt from everything while women are always guilty. While these double standards may be seen as being unfair to women, they are actually to our benefit. Only opening up more when a man has proven that he is indeed high value, only serves to keep us safe. Even if a guy were to dump or ghost a woman, it would hurt less if the woman had invested little to nothing at all compared to if she had given a lot of herself to the man.
Plus, it's what FDS preaches: let men prove themselves to you. When you give them things they so desperately want early on without them doing much for you (i.e. sex, attention, your delicious home-cooked meals), they take you for granted and take off. Let a man prove that he's worthy of you before you give him your best.
Men also judge women for not being readily available to them. You're damned if you do, damned if you don't, under the patriarchy.
Not getting invested early on is a a better course of action, because at least, you can somewhat protect yourself.
Men are always exempt, women are always guilty. 💯
I always get a little heated about the dating app one--men go on there to find women, treat the women there like garbage because wHy wOmAn oN ApP sHe mUst bE DEfEcTivE*, so women leave the apps in droves and/or don't stick around long, and then men complain about how they get no matches or there's only bots and sex workers looking for business and nO rEAL wImMins. HOW DO THEY NOT SEE THE ISSUE? BRUHHHHH
MAKE DATING FUN AND SAFE FOR WOMEN AND MAYBE YOU'LL GET YOUR PP TOUCHED ONCE IN A WHILE
good GOD
*side note: these morons think any woman worth having would be asked out in real life and therefore not be on the apps, but the reality is a lot of men don't ask women out in person AT ALL anymore, even if they do find her attractive and actually have the opportunity. However they WILL match with her on OLD and then proceed to waste her time on the app and other social media. Source: College.
What I'm saying is, a lot of women go on the apps because men in their everyday lives are too wimpy or porn addicted to make an effort to court them, but then they run into the same low-effort problem because men think women on the apps are automatically low value...when it was (those) men's behavior in real life that pushed women onto the apps in the first place to try and find someone to date 🙄
Not quite on topic, but other common beliefs...
> Women are nurturing and caring. That is until you have two nurturing and caring people in the same room and then all bets are off. Cat fight! Only give your care towards men, ladies.
> Women are bitchy and love to gossip. Women who believe this won't talk to other women, thus not sharing vital information about men and other important aspects of life. I wonder who that benefits?