He Invited me to dinner and refused to order

It's a trick to shame you into not ordering anything either or to go "you ordered it, you pay for it! Even 50-50 isn't fair because I only had a drink" in the end. He was pissed and blocked you because you ordered something and expected him to pay and didn't fall for his scam.

I would honestly get up and leave when they say they don't want to eat anything. Having dinner/lunch together implies both of you eating.

Sounds like he's too broke to date and he knows it, and instead of -not dating- he gets all pissy with his options, which tells me that he's mentally broken as well.

"If she's not willing to starve for me -

Sir nobody is willing to starve for you. Stay glued to your phone, where you belong, please. 🙄

Also, I noticed he's cool with the liquor, but not with the food. If not a rapist, his priorities are out of line. Bullet dodged.

So he doesn't eat after 7 pm, but did so anyway? Wtf?

The 45 min drive was already a huge red flag for me. A man that tries to get me to drive so far away is getting his ass booted from my life. For one thing, it's dangerous. And second, like all the others have already stated here, it makes you give into the sunk cost fallacy after all that time and gas wasted on driving over there. A first date is always as close to home as possible that can get you in and out of there and back home safely within 10-20 minutes at most.

As soon as some idiot tries to play head games with you, including "I'm fasting uwu", get up and just walk off. I'm serious. I know it's frightening to do so in the presence of men when we all know what they are capable of. But it's always best to just leave. Just say "Excuse me, I forgot my wallet in my car." (brokies love hearing that like it's sweet music) and then book it once you're safe in the vehicle.

Was this man from a dating app?

Do a video chat with them first. See if you vibe like that. If they have even a bit of sincerity, they will agree to the video chat. Otherwise, they're looking to play games for their own sick fun, and get you in bed for nothing. That's all this gaming food is about: messing with you.

Please do not ever drive more than 10-15 minutes. And parking can’t take more than 5 minutes.

Why? When you are “inconvenient”, you will weed out men that are looking for an easy lay.

But just as important, because you already drove 45 minutes- “sunk cost fallacy” sets in. You will be more willing to just get up and leave if you only drove 10 minutes. But after a 45 minute drive, the mindset becomes, “I’m already here. Let’s just see how this goes.” And look how it goes.

BTw- I have been in entire relationships with men who did all of the driving.

Why would you even agree to a place that’s 45 minutes away from you? That’s already a red flag.

Eating-disordered men are one of my biggest red flags. They will project that on you as well and expect you to not enjoy food either. I would not consider spending time with a man who does not want to enjoy food with me or who adheres to strict diets. It’s a truly miserable existence to me.

it’s also really cheap of course. I would not want a man who can’t even afford to enjoy good food. often men who are cheap about dates and food have some other habit that takes up all their money and have no problem spending hundreds a month on video games, weed, collecting video game figurines to paint or anime figurines, some other lvm hobby. or they are just lazy and under-or unemployed.

you can prevent this from happening again by giving up on men entirely. works wonders.

Inviting me to dinner and then saying "I dont want to order food" is very unattractive. He's making you feel awkward about eating a meal. That's at minimum very poor social skills. Worst case scenario is he's doing it on purpose to throw you off your game. Wouldn't get a second date with *me*. Lol I have a small stomach; if I know I'm going to dinner I'll skip lunch or whatever to make sure I can eat my money's worth at dinner. I'm gonna be hungry and you better believe I'm ordering food, AND I'm judging his no-food-ordering ass for his poor planning.

This was a male dating tip being circulated on TikTok a while back but... it was a joke?

Basically this guy was saying that if you want to save money on dinner dates, eat before you go on the date and when you get there say that you are dieting and order a small salad or appetizer. The woman will be both impressed that you are dieting and also feel too embarrassed to order a more expensive dish.

Now just FYI, the original video was clearly parodying and making fun of male dating coaches but a lot of dudes in the comment section were saying, "Wow this is actually a great idea!!" Many comments from women were pushing back for this exact reason: If she's hungry and it's dinner time, any normal logical person would just order a proper meal.

I'm sure that video was based on an actual tip being circulated by some red pill dating coach. That seems to be what is going on here. I'm sorry this happened to you and I'm not sure what you can do to sus out this behavior before it happens, but if it happens again I would ask for your food to go and just leave so you don't have to sit there while some weirdo watches you eat.

I would have gotten up and left . But I also learnt it hard way 🥲

It’s a test to see how agreeable to his bullshit you are. Firstly, you flat out block and delete coffee dates. That’s a hard no. You’re worth more than a cheap ass coffee. Same for cheap restaurants. If a scrote manages to get you into this no-eat situation anyway, you order whatever the hell you want to make you happy, then you go home, block and delete and think about the nice meal you enjoyed.

Just walk out the minute a guy tells you he's not eating or drinking on a dinner or drinks date that HE asked you to. It's just total manipulation. On his part. And always remember, you can't spell "manipulation" without MAN.

Omg this actually happens? 💀 How much of a loser does a guy have to be to pull something like this? It goes without saying that you're far too good for this.

I’ve had something similar happen to me before too! I was young , early 20s and I didn’t know what to do!

This is back when I accepted coffee dates and I get there and he said he doesn’t drink coffee but I can get whatever I wanted. I thought it was so weird back then. So I had my coffee and then left. I never takes to him again even though he kept asking me out.

if this happened now id probably just walk out. but I think the first red flag was making you drive 45 mins and then pay for parking. on a first date I only will go somewhere that is MAX 20 min drive. And the parking better be free.

Also: if this ever happens to me again, I’m going to pal it up with the waitstaff and bartender. I’ll make a plan with them, get a kick ass to-go dinner, put it on his tab if I can, and slip out the back. Tired of this shit.

Yep happened to me with a scrote recently too. Twice we made dinner plans and he said some shit about “I’ll eat in front of you eventually, I’m just nervous” — while that may be a real thing, if I’m being honest, I need to be with someone that can eat a meal with me in public. Also. Feels like a lie to run this game that everyone in the comments is talking about — trying to trick me into just drinking.