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In the mid-2000s, I was a frequent magazine reader. I loved reading CosmoGirl, Seventeen, and Teen Vogue. Such nostalgia!
Every now and then, these magazines would feature articles about women planning their dream weddings. All of them were obsessed with the idea of getting married, and many of them weren’t even engaged or in a relationship lol. Yikes!
They all wanted to find "the one" and rush into marriage as part of their master plan to have their once in a lifetime dream wedding.
I remember one article about a woman who had an entire composition notebook dedicated to her future wedding. In it she had outlined her theme: blush pink decor, bows, lace details, candles, and inspo pictures. She wanted everything to be exactly like her childhood dream and was unwilling to compromise with her fiance💀.
I remember reading those articles and feeling like the odd one out because I had never thought about getting married. Even now, I’ve never met a guy and thought, “Wow, I’d like to marry him.” My reaction has usually been the opposite🤭.
When Pinterest became popular, I saw similar articles online about single women having secret Pinterest boards for their future weddings. These articles were everywhere; you couldn't get away from them.
Once again, I wondered if I was the odd one out or if society was pushing the narrative that single women are obsessed with getting married. I also can't help but feel sad about how the media is cruel to us, making us think that marriage is all we have to look forward to in life.
I’ve met many women in my life and none of them have been obsessed with getting married lol contrary to what the media claims. I have a few friends who do want to get married but it is not their whole personality.
Ps. It didn't help that there were so many rom-coms in the 2000s explored this theme.
Ive never once daydreamed about my hypothetical wedding. I used to have fun asking women I knew if they, at any point in their lives, fantasized about weddings. The answers were 100% no. Women and ESPECIALLY little girls do not fantasize about weddings.
The magazines and things youre talking about are propaganda. If girls and women were naturally obsessed with weddings, there would be no need for propaganda. But capitalism and the patriarchy at large depend on the myth that women are bubble-headed romantic morons obsessed with marriage. Key word: myth.
I'm honestly convinced at this point that the 2000s was just a pickme brain washing agenda (though not sure if it was deliberate or not). I, too, felt like the odd one out when I never had an interest in dating boys (let alone thinking about marriage) when I was in middle or high school because, to me, I just didn't get the appeal that all my friends felt. Unknowingly, I was practicing fds principles as a child before I even discovered it and just didn't see any of my male peers as "high value" enough to be worthy of dating. I honestly don't think we were actually the "odd ones out," rather, we were "ahead of our time" or too smart to fall for the pickme brainwash culture bs. And considering we're all on FDS, I'd say we're still doing a damn good job of resisting pickme culture.
I want to add I've seen a lot of progress lately in the sense that women are acknowledging the harms of pickmeism being trapped in a toxic relationship/marriage in spaces outside of FDS. Overall, this is a very good thing. It also gives me faith that the media exaggerates how many women actually behave like pickmes and that most women don't actually behave like this. But it is scary to think about how media is constantly used to promote pickme beliefs by pushing this narrative that "normal women behave like this and you're strange if you don't." Earlier today I saw a video about a pickme trying to promote her "amazing sex club lifestyle" but I could see in her eyes that she was very troubled and just trying her best to hide it and appear happy. I feel bad for all the women who get dragged into pickmeism because they're lead to believe this is the "norm" when it's not.
LMAO No
Wow I know exactly what you mean. I was shocked when I was in high school in the computer lab with these girls and they ALL had wedding pinterest boards. Alot of them were very generic and I think they probably were just interested in interior design decorating aspect of it? The fact that their design choices were giving Michael's hobby store really proved they were just teens who had no idea or had any kind of developed personal aesthetics. Whoever set them up for this really did not care about them in my opinion and likely the parents had "I just work here" energy. It felt strange to witness. Now these same girls are adults now they have multiple children by scrotes, at the very least in the Midwest some scrotes here do get into construction, forklift, or trucking jobs that do pay well, but they don't seem happy so all that planning and yearning was literally for nothing. It made me wonder who allowed these teen girls to center scrotes so much? They had no distinguishable hobbies or interests so it was difficult to talk to them unlike women who really know themselves.
Seeing this made me feel all kinds of emotions but mostly pity that they had no zero role models so they just defaulted into what society is expecting. My pinterest was filled with psychology and side hustle content and all kinds of art and culture so I was very confused they were so genetic and cookie cutter. So many countless teen girls are let down and only praised for making themselves small yet young scrotes are boosted to the top and encouraged in their sports or other hobbies and goals.
Well - OK. I used to be like this, yes, probably 20-something years ago - but as I lost hope over the course of time of finding someone, I stopped entertaining these ideas.
I never gave weddings any thought at all and none of my friends ever discussed it in my presence either.
I did used to wonder if I was the odd one out and maybe everyone was obsessing over it without me.