.png)
Hi Ladies,
I have something that’s been on my mind lately and just need a safe place to rant. I’m in awe of how much truth there is to it.
3-4 years ago, I got cheated on. I was the pick-me who took care of their ex, saw the red flags but still believed that our love was “real”. He told me he couldn’t wait to see me walk down the aisle in my wedding dress.. and so hearing that I was sure I wanted to marry this dude. Well, long story short, someone snitched to me about him cheating on me with a girl that hung out in our friend group and so I left him. At the time I just started working at a lounge. I was 23, my ex was 24.
Met these group of guys while working there. One of the guys in particular was easy to talk to, we eventually became friends because we got along so well. I eventually started to like his company and we started dating. This man was 45 when I met him. Divorced, has two kids. This was my first time being with an older man. At the time, I was in shocked that I fell for a dude almost twice my age. I couldn’t understand how that could’ve happened. I believed it’s because we had similar values and beliefs when it came to relationships.
I remember he would always mention how he liked me because I was genuine and it’s cute that I’m “naive”. At the time I didn’t think much of it as I was young. He displayed a lot of HVM qualities. He always had my back, Uber me to his place, paid for all the expenses, cooked for me, let me borrow his car for work, respected my boundaries, yada yada. Basically knew how to be a gentleman. At the time, I felt so in love with him. He told me he dates to marry (as did I) and so marriage was what we both hoped for in the near future. Two years in, he brought up marriage again to be sure we were still on the same page. I loved this man, but for some reason, my gut was saying no. Eventually I broke up with him because I started feeling guilty that I didn’t feel the same way anymore. We remained acquaintances as the years went by and I don’t know if it’s because I am growing older, but it wasn’t until this year that everything made sense. All the spoken statements about age gap relationships talked on FDS made sense. My mind began to dive deeper into the situation and may I say that I feel disgusted in some way? That I let a man who can be my dad had sex with me.
There were little things he said or did that was so misogynistic. He even told on himself a couple times while we were together. I didn’t think too much into it at the time. Here are some of the things:
🚩 kept telling me in the near beginning that he liked me because I am naive and innocent.
🚩 Would bring up other girls that were trying to get at him. Went into detail of their appearance (boob size, body type blah blah)
🚩 Told me how a girl tried to flirt with him when he was out and he totally ignored her. Asked me if I was proud of him for doing that (I told him that’s what you’re suppose to do when committed???)
🚩 told me he doesn’t intentionally go for younger girls, it just so happens that he meets and befriends them
🚩 Admitted to me that he “guesses he doesn’t go for women his age because they have a lot of baggage and younger women asking him for help makes him feel more like a man”
🚩 He never showed affection to his daughter when he was still part of the family. He was afraid she would take it the wrong way and didn’t want her to grow up thinking that was okay
🚩 Kept mentioning how I’m mature for my age.
The list goes on and on…
In the end, I don’t regret my decision of not marrying him. I can imagine how unhappy I would be by this age if I were to marry him a few years ago. I’m 27 now. Older men who date younger girls are a huge walking red flag. They’re losers and no matter what their sob story is, there’s a reason why they are still single. It took me 4-5 years to really get it to my head and understand.
You still have your whole adult life in front of you while he already wasted half of his. And it is he who really has the baggage (divorced and with weird relationships towards his daughter, that poor daughter ew)
Hey! Just wanted to say that I’m so glad that you ended things with him. You’ve got a bright future ahead! Also ignore alicekirk68, that person sounds like potential troll… Ladies, report that account. You have my respect and best wishes x
Major projection on his part. All this guy thinks about is sex and young girls, having a daughter is a definite internal conflict for him. Gross.
And sorry not sorry, a divorced 40-something man with 2 kids is a red flag for sure, it means some woman would rather go it alone with the children than continue to put up with this dudes shenanigans anymore. I met a guy online (before I quit that for good) who was 41, divorced, had 4 kids in another state and in our 2 phone conversations all he did was talk about his recent 20 something ex GF that he met in online GAMING. 🚩🚩🚩
Also, I'm so glad to see FDS in action! Having the tools to protect ourselves is key, and knowing we have the support of other women so you're less likely to be gaslit by some pickmesha or scrote about your decisions. 😎
I had sex with man a couple times twice my age. Hadn't had sex in a year at the time. Slowly crawling out of a deep depression. Standards were obviously low and self esteem in the gutter. It was awful lol. Something I don't mind about red pill scrotes is that they tell on themselves fast. Older dudes know how to pretend to be a decent person a little longer, probably because they grew up touching grass and having social skills. Being young and dumb I ignored the few red flags that i recognized but luckily I got away unscathed.
I had finally drank like a half of a beer after a couple years not drinking, and saw some old friends that I hadn't seen in a year. I was finally comfortable socializing again. I told him this and because of that half beer sitting weird in my belly I didn't want to have sex. He fucking screamed at me "You're fucking other people aren't you! You must be! You always want to have sex you're fucking other people!"
We had sex like 4 times. I was not his girlfriend. He was fat and short. He triangulated me with his dead ex wife lmao. I just looked at him wide eyed then ran full speed busting out his front door and peeled out in my car. Blocked his number and never talked to him again. The bar for men is so fucking low if he's older and single somethings usually wrong with them. Look at all the shit they get away with and yet still no one will have them. Not worth it. Just run.
We all come to FDS somehow. Even younger you knew something was off. Keep trusting that instinct
Ummm...can you elaborate on "take it the wrong way" when it came to his daughter?
Didn’t show affection to his daughter because HE DISNT WANT HER TO GET THE WRONG IDEA?’?!?!?!?!? Da faq
You made the right choice not staying with this guy. I'd like to offer one piece of advice. It takes extensive vetting to know if a man is HV. Him being generous with his time and money while being easy to talk to is bare minimum decent behavior from a man. Signs of disrespect are an automatic disqualifier for HV status. Treat all men as zero value until proven otherwise. You're not being mean by this assumption, you're being practical.
I would never be able to respect a woman who validated ancient moids pedo fantasies just like that