DELETE 👏 THOSE 👏 DATING APPS 👏

They are all fucbois or men who were fully rejected by women and society in real life. Looooow level dudes.

I thought no one approaches you though?

They don't but I talk to men at my job ot social events.

No no, my fear is that if I get married I have to live with a man and give him access to my money...

Prenups and secret savings will save you there. It's handbook stuff. If you're fearful of these things, then single life (no dating at all, no OLD) is the way to go.

FDS women should not feel fearful going into dating. We should have our game, boundaries, standards so on lock that we know we are rock solid for whatever might happen. Actually utilizing FDS skills equates to you being surefooted in the dating and marriage game. But you have to follow it and understand the reasoning behind following it.

I can't stand the thought of living with someone, though. Not after having to take care of my dad. My brother might be hinting that I'm going to take care of him down the line too.

AMEN! Can you imagine being recognized irl because you had your photo up on a dating app and now this person knows you are lonely and lookin for a mAn? I dare say it's the digital equivalent of standing on a street corner making eye contact with every passing male driver.

Even out of the ones who aren't immediate sexual pests, their conversational skill barely get them past: "hey".

If they are even remotely attractive and successful they will be ambivalent pricks, because they do have the advantage in a sea full of losers.

I was on one app for about a month in a country that is renowned for not talking to strangers, but never met anyone cause they look like mutants (will post pics soon!). Would rather die alone than advertise myself like a product for evolutionary waste males.

Another major problem is that I wouldn't want to even use my real name. My name is associated with a certain religion and women in that religion (I don't even practice it or believe in it) are only supposed to marry men in that religion. They're not even supposed to date. Someone from that community could find out and wonder why I'm on a dating app when I'm technically forbidden from dating (according to them). Not only that, dating a man not from their religion? Perish the thought, according to them. It's a hot mess for crying out loud.

Girl they don't even be reading all that

Scarcity mindset and you're wasting time on apps after work to fiddle fuck around with OLD trash with swiping messaging, etc. Your time is already being wasted, but in a sea where the bar is in hell for men and they have the upper hand. Your odds are worse on there, but I know you don't wanna see it.

Editing to add, if you were having matches at a rate you'd like to see, you'd be out for these dudes multiple x a week with your current mindset. The excuses are endless. Level up, join something, get out, avoid festivals. Concerts are not a great place to meet men. Theyre drunk and its loud.... it's not a magic formula kept behind golden gates. You have options but you only want to play that OLD is your only option, even worse that you should be only focused on healing right now.... but you dont want to do that and you don't want to level up and get out in different ways and you want to stay hooked on OLD every evening.

When you get advice, you say you're too tired for men... but you're on OLD, so it's not the case.

When we offer suggestions, you say you won't be dating, but remain on OLD (which is you actively trying to date) and make it a big focus of your time outside of work.

It's a shit or get off the pot scenario. Your current strategies are doing you zero favors and are actually subtracting from your life and your time. Your mindset is the reason for the roundabout thinking. You need time to heal, but you know how I feel.

Why do so many womens minds automatically go to a bar when you say meet IRL? Of course thats gonna be a flop, men are there to get drunk and hit on anyone who looks decent 3 beers in.

There's conferences and conventions and even dog parks you can go to where normal professional men can be found. Be creative!

Just because they don't approach you doesn't mean anything, they could be in a relationship, gay, know you're out of their league, or just weak cowards. You lose nothing if you're actually interested in what you're doing. But the men online are no doubt either desperate or just see you as an option out of 5 other girls they matched with that week.

Men who don't even use these apps exist and are way better because they were never desperate enough to get on them. I have never personally met with someone on an app and have been in 5 long term relationships lol. One of them did use apps and he was the worst one.

I do stuff, but I never meet men in a romantic setting because like I said, they don't approach. The men I meet irl are taken or below my league.

That last article. Holy fucking shit. I'm not victim blaming, but that rapist is a great reminder not to meet at a man's apartment early on. Don't meet there, don't "have drinks" there, don't "have dinner" there, don't "watch movies" there, don't "meet his dog" there, don't plan a date there.

Men do this so much on there. Google "rape on dating apps 2024" and just....get ready for a long list of results.

I remember reading stories where serial rapists were on there repeatedly creating new accounts, one woman spotted it about her rapist from the app and tried to tell the companies and report it to the police. It turns out he had done it to like 3 other girls. The dating app companies would NOT release the information about the rapist to the police!!! I've always had a bad taste in my mouth after that story. It was out of Aus...

These apps have histories of literally defending and hiding serial rapists... Even from the police! I'm sure it happened under Match Group.

It looks like they are stepping up a bit better now, and Match Group intends to add in person verification later this year, but shit.... how long did things like this have to go on? How many more will happen this year until this rolls out?

Never forget these men are strangers and you have no way of gauging their personality or the friends they keep AT ALL. Another benefit of meeting scrotes in person is that you can get better a grip on what their social circle is like, who their people are, etc. Not saying it is everything, but it surely helps.

Yeah interesting! I'm kind of looking back to around 2004 when I was in undergrad and these started to take off. My weirdest man acquaintances who were just... not the greatest people nor the greatest looking tended to be on there. My hotter friends who had a little bit more going for them were pursing women IRL. But that is college and I think a different type of subculture too. It was super easy to date who you wanted to date and options were endless. I didn't try apps until like 2015 and I know for sure by that point it was trashed, LOL. Like dumpster diving looking for a good steak.

Oh sheesh we got a not-all-mener here 🙄

Then keep your apps, I'm not your queen handing down a decree.

I repeat, quality men are not on dating apps 99% of the time and if they are, they have you and 1000 other options that seem hardly any different based on a pic and 25 word bio. So in that subtle way it's NOT the same. Plus, while creeps and criminals often get kicked out of places and avoided by everyone, they can have multiple accounts online under fake names and ages with a fresh supply of victims sent to them every day. But suit yourself. If it's that way in your country then maybe this isn't necessarily about you... However, I guarantee if women in your country weren't making themselves available like this, the men would follow, but I digress.

Out of curiosity, how long have you been on the apps and how much time do you spend swiping/chatting per day or week? How much time do you spend on social media and consuming solitary entertainment? Not claiming to know your situation but sometimes priorities or sacrifices need to made, including the search for a partner if life is really that hectic and your budget that stretched. I understand many of us are exhausted and overwhelmed but these apps are proven to be a time sucking net negative. If you don't have time/energy for a social life or pursuing interests how do you expect to nurture an emotionally fulfilling relationship AND keep yourself sane? You pretty much get the energy & intentionality you put in.

I agree with your main points about dating apps having issues—especially how they can enable low-effort interactions and bad actors. However, I think your tone comes across as condescending, and you make a lot of assumptions about people’s lives and priorities. Women is my country are not easy due to religion. I am also not an "all mener", this forum should get modded a lot better if it has people like you writing such things.

Not everyone has the same circumstances, and just because someone is on a dating app doesn’t mean they lack real-world social skills or intentionality. It’s just one tool among many. While I get your frustration and doom attitude, a more balanced discussion might be more productive than talking down to women who tell you they disagree with your points.

I don't care to be tone policed, and I will not pander to make my words palatable on this platform. If you agree with the message, great, if you don't also great. You don't need my agreement to do what you want. I never said all men, no one says that so it's redundant and tiresome with this "not all men" statement derailing the original message. It really doesn't make sense to expect me to consider every single individual circumstance when I make an overwhelmingly true generalization.

One thing I know for sure is that men have managed to find women for 100s of thousands of years just fine without a dating app so you cannot convince me it's necessary so long as the real world is still out there.

I don't know what you mean by easy, which is an assumption in itself about people in non-religious countries, but from what I've observed: religious women are the first to offer themselves up as a home appliance for men and the last to separate from a POS husband. Religious men can pretty much bet on the fact that a religious single woman is eager to get married to the first seemingly "good man" she comes across, and once trapped cannot say no to sex and will put up with just about anything, since divorce is seen as a moral failing especially on her part. Hence you are pretty easy yourselves in your own ways.